I want to run away!!!

[miss fortune]

My life, in general, is going quite well... I have an SO who I adore and who adores me, we have a house, I have a job that I do well at and requires little in the way of routine. Somewhere in the back of my head there's a voice that keeps saying "run away!"

I've felt the compulsion to run and keep on running since I was a kid... I used to run away from school when younger and escape for weekends while in college without telling anyone where I was going... I even got a good excuse and fled the country once for a few months. Something about perpetual motion and meeting people who don't know me and having that sort of blank slate is thrilling

Problem is though, I LIKE the life that I have... it's kind of a split there- the compulsion to run and the enjoyment of what I have. I KNOW that I can't have it both ways and I've already thrown my lot in with one of the options. Anyone else have this split going on? what do you do about it?

 

[prplchknz]

I'm a bad p, i like things to stay the same no matter how bad they get. so i can't help you.

 

[miss fortune]

I'm a very good P unfortunatly

 

[Atomic Fiend]

Sure, take me with you wherever you go.

Besides you don't have to run away and never come back.

 

[A window to the soul]

Do it. I'll go with you!

 

[miss fortune]

the problem is that I WANT to be a good, stable pillar of the community type but I doubt that I have it in me... I'm kind of NATURALLY bad

 

[SilkRoad]

I voted that I'd like to run away, but it is very much circumstance-driven at the moment. Things have just been a bit sucky lately and that makes me wonder if I really want to be where I am. It's not a feeling where I desperately want to run, though. I think last time I felt that way was several years ago after a bad breakup (and I actually did leave that city a year later, and wish I'd left sooner!!), and before that it was when I was pretty tired of the town I grew up in.

I'm INFJ, I doubt running is too much of an issue for me I'm more like, put down roots somewhere and schedule in some good travelling.

 

[miss fortune]

after breaking up from a 3.5 year relationship that involved an engagement I actually picked up and moved to a different city over an hour and a half away where I didn't know anyone and didn't have a job yet... different scenery and I was still good at finding the same old types of problems for a while

something liberating about nobody knowing my past though

and @ people planning travel... my ISTJ is delighting in carefully plotting our mini-vacation that I suggested on a whim in a few weeks!

 

[KDude]

I'm a very good P unfortunatly

I think it's the Se version of P that does this. I could use some of it. Perhaps we could do a trade. Here's a song to get you started.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XatoHLQcrTY]/[/youtube]

 

[guesswho]

Are you running away from something specific? Fear of ... ?

 

[miss fortune]

no... just running for the pure joy of running... because that's what I DO

would I love to run away from my past as well? Hellz yes! but that one isn't possible and I know it

and kdude... you may have all of my locational instability you desire

 

[KDude]

and kdude... you may have all of my locational instability you desire

I sympathize really. It must be a similar pull as mine, just in reverse. Just recommending that you appreciate the good things in life would be trite and unhelpful. You need something to stimulate you and keep you appreciating. I suggest piling on some hobbies. Create some fun while you're at it. Start some parties or something. It'll at least wear you down for awhile.

 

[miss fortune]

yeah... I could do with some hobbies I suppose

and I really do enjoy being a stranger more than I like to be known at all

 

[kelric]

I've wanted to run away too -- to just sort of get a reboot on life. A new place, new expectations, new opportunities, the whole deal. Hasn't happened, and I'm not sure that it will - it's hardly practical at this point, and I'd be giving up a lot to do it, with no real expectation of being able to make up for it financially, etc. later. I know that part of it's just antsy-ness, too. Few things are more relaxing and stress-relieving for me than just *going*. Usually that takes the form of just driving and being physically in motion, but there's a part of me that would just want to throw away my position in life and start over, too.

Part of that's just wishful thinking, too, of course. Easy to think that a reboot would fix things when you haven't yet done it and realize that it's quite a pain in the behind, too .

 

[KDude]

yeah... I could do with some hobbies I suppose

and I really do enjoy being a stranger more than I like to be known at all

I think Se (and extroverted P in general) generally likes "the new". Sometimes you guys for go for the obvious ways of getting that though. In your case, it's "I NEED TO RUN AWAY!!" But you can find plenty to do that's new without being so drastic. I guess that's my only advice. I wish I could gear it for you. I don't know what ideas to throw out for you exactly. Just chill out for now and think of some things.. don't get in your car tonight and take off.

 

[Thalassa]

When I change my life I don't move an hour and a half away, I move across the country. I've done it three times now (NC to CA ...well, then to NV from CA, but then from NV to WV, and now from WV to CA). It's never been pointless, though, I always had a good reason.

I used to also like running away spontaneously to the beach for a few days about an hour or two away in NC when I was younger.

I don't know what to say if you still want to run, even though you like your life.

I don't know. Maybe you should take more road trips. Are you working too much? Get to the root cause of this feeling - you may just be overwhelmed by something that is manageable - before it becomes a real problem and you regret leaving.

 

[miss fortune]

I'm not even sure that it's something that I want to run FROM... I'm kind of afraid that it's the pure, freedom of running- window of the car down, wind in my hair, the knowlege that I don't even KNOW where I'm going to end up next and that I never know what the next day will bring... something almost romantic about that in a way

though I know that if I run, I'll miss what I have even more than I miss running... I feel split there

 

[Poser]

I have had these exact thoughts many, many times. But I don't think that I could ever actually do it. So now I sometimes fantasize about those stories of people that go for a drive, have an accident and end up with total amnesia and live a new life for a few years before they are found. Except, I wonder if it would be life altering if you didn't consciously make the decision to change?

 

[Thalassa]

Oh, I love that feeling too.

That's why I said take more road trips, so that you don't like, leave your wonderful boyfriend and house because you get so fed up from not having that feeling of being on the highway with wind in your hair.

I do relate, but if you like your life, just be careful.

 

[miss fortune]

yeah... I feel like I'm playing with a lit stick of dynamite even ENTERTAINING those thoughts... I can't run, I'll slip back into my old ways and I'm pretty convinced that the only thing I really run from is me anyways

and yeah... stories about people with amnesia are kind of enviable until you put yourself in their shoes and realize that it'd just be confusing instead of liberating