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  1. #31
    Senior Member substitute's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nightning View Post
    Yes... but if the very strong Fs suddenly change I think you'll miss their nagging a little bit. The difference between Ts and Fs acts as a foil. Makes you appreciate something so much more.
    Actually no... When I spend a lot of time around Thinkers I don't miss the Feelers or their input at all, I just find the peace, lack of drama, the clarity and directness refreshing and peaceful. When I have to deal with some of the Feelers I know, I feel like I have to sorta 'gird myself' or roll up my sleeves, sorta thing But when I have to deal with Feelers a lot, I do miss the clarity and directness and pine to be back among Thinkers again! I guess it's only natural, a variant of homesickness maybe?

    It all feels like a rather uneven playing field to me, you know? I'm not saying I'm right but just describing how it comes across to me. It's like intuitives and Thinkers are expected to always come over to the Feelers' and Sensors' plains of operation, like we have to be ambi-planal haha, or something, because they claim not to be able to come over to us. So like, when dealing with Feelers I have to be gentle and couch things carefully and tread on eggshells, and with Sensors I have to struggle to speak in concrete terms and to go through stages of thought clearly rather than jumping about, but if I ever ask that a Feeler dam up their emotions for a moment and just be direct and objective, or a Sensor to just use their bloody imagination for a minute, I'm somehow being mean, I'm invalidating them, I'm being unreasonable, I'm not accepting them as they are etc etc...

    Now this isn't a generalization because I'm talking here about some of my experiences with certain individual people, and I'm not blaming all of the issues I have with people on mine or their MBTI types. It's just this is the title, you know, like you wanna know what it's like being a Thinker so that's what I'm telling you, that for me, that's how it sometimes feels, whether or not there's any truth to it.
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  2. #32
    We all got it comin' kid Delilah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by substitute View Post
    It all feels like a rather uneven playing field to me, you know? I'm not saying I'm right but just describing how it comes across to me. It's like intuitives and Thinkers are expected to always come over to the Feelers' and Sensors' plains of operation, like we have to be ambi-planal haha, or something, because they claim not to be able to come over to us. So like, when dealing with Feelers I have to be gentle and couch things carefully and tread on eggshells, and with Sensors I have to struggle to speak in concrete terms and to go through stages of thought clearly rather than jumping about, but if I ever ask that a Feeler dam up their emotions for a moment and just be direct and objective, or a Sensor to just use their bloody imagination for a minute, I'm somehow being mean, I'm invalidating them, I'm being unreasonable, I'm not accepting them as they are etc etc...
    It's not just you, I find dealing with too many Sensors and Feelers for an extended period intensely draining, it feels like work because it is work for me, but I still put forth the effort to do it when I must, it would be nice to have it go both ways.
    *clinging to my face like a starfish of love* ....... PinkPiranha

  3. #33
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    I don't know if it helps to remember that Thinkers tend to evaluate their feelings as objects (if they recognize they are having feelings); Values-oriented people tend to subject their thoughts to their values.

    So at the end of an argument, someone could try to make me "feel better" by saying lots of nice things and apologizing for the conflict... but if the conclusion doesn't make sense, then it still doesn't make me feel better. It continues to eat at me until I can point out what doesn't make sense and have it addressed somehow (even if it's just the other person acknowledging my point and then refusing to agree. At that point, they've acknowledged the inconsistency, so whether or not they want to agree is inconsequential).

    I still tend to do better with NFs than SFs, overall. Even when T/F conflicts, the N connection creates a bridge.
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

  4. #34
    We all got it comin' kid Delilah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jennifer View Post
    I don't know if it helps to remember that Thinkers tend to evaluate their feelings as objects (if they recognize they are having feelings); .

    True, I view mine as dirty, lying, distracting objects that I want to lock into a dark box and bury in the backyard, after I do that then I feel happy, until I bury that.........
    *clinging to my face like a starfish of love* ....... PinkPiranha

  5. #35
    Member The Unknown Essence's Avatar
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    1) What goes on in your mind when you're thinking? How would you describe it?

    My thinking is not sequential. Thoughts develop in a very random manner in my mind and I tend to make connections between unrelated ideas very easily.

    2) How much does logics weight in on your decisions and how much does feelings come into play? How do you determine whether you've over-thinked?

    Logic definitely overrides emotion for me. I always thought of feelings as very fickle and I've never understood how people can make major decisions based on a changeable thing. Logic, however, is a constant. As for "overthinking" something, there's no such thing for me.

    3) How easily can you go through the steps you've taken to arrive at a conclusion? Is it automatic? Or does it involve some translation to get it into a form understandable by others?

    It's hard for me to explain my thought process to others. Because of the fact that my thoughts are very abstract, it's difficult to "convert" them for those with a linear mindset.
    "But only in their dreams can men be truly free. 'Twas always thus, and always thus will be." - Dead Poets Society

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  6. #36
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    I posted this on a blog and it was a response to a post. I thought it pertinent here too.

    Here's what I think I'm learning. (Edit: from the Feeler/Thinker/Blog) Neither the "F" nor the "T" is of more value than the other. Neither approach is a choice in its demanded dominance. Its no different than being male or female... they're different, surely, but equal values(parity.) One cannot place value judgements on them nor force one's self into being the other.

    Of course, everyone thinks. Of course, everyone feels. The difference lies in which approach is necessary/required in the individual to be most effective as a human being. To ask an "F" to function as a "T" would disable them into paralysis.... likewise for the "T" trying to be "F." For instance, strong negative emotion does, quite literally, incapacitate me. Perhaps to explain to an "F" I would have to define it as rage which they've surely experienced... rage hinders the ability to think and, consequently, make wise choices. The enraged person is somewhat senseless. For me, as a "T," what an "F" might experience as simple anger interferes with me just as rage would to an "F." So, yes, if I do ever experience anger, I will immediately push it down in order to think. It has, now, become so automatic that I perceive it as not ever experiencing anger.

    This one is pretty easily understood but becomes "murkier" or harder to grasp for an "F" I'm sure when the whole gamut of emotional possibilities are considered... those they might see as more positive emotions... but the same thing occur generally speaking. All I can say is this "pushing down" in order to stay effectively present is an automatic, normal, process. The responses in the face of inhibiting emotion are learned from others. That doesn't mean we're cold, uncaring, people... we just need to stay focused in thought to be effective if we're going to stay connected to/with them. Which is, surely, what we find required by our caring. Caring, for us, lies more in our thoughts about the person and their needs rather than emotional identification or connection with them.

  7. #37
    Senior Member bluebell's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eri View Post
    It's not just you, I find dealing with too many Sensors and Feelers for an extended period intensely draining, it feels like work because it is work for me, but I still put forth the effort to do it when I must, it would be nice to have it go both ways.
    Yep, same here. It would be nice to meet in the middle. A few do that, but most don't.

  8. #38
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    Quote Originally Posted by Seanan View Post
    Of course, everyone thinks. Of course, everyone feels. The difference lies in which approach is necessary/required in the individual to be most effective as a human being. To ask an "F" to function as a "T" would disable them into paralysis.... likewise for the "T" trying to be "F." For instance, strong negative emotion does, quite literally, incapacitate me. Perhaps to explain to an "F" I would have to define it as rage which they've surely experienced... rage hinders the ability to think and, consequently, make wise choices. The enraged person is somewhat senseless. For me, as a "T," what an "F" might experience as simple anger interferes with me just as rage would to an "F." So, yes, if I do ever experience anger, I will immediately push it down in order to think. It has, now, become so automatic that I perceive it as not ever experiencing anger.
    How true this is, at least for me. Thanks for putting this into words!

  9. #39
    Emerging Tallulah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Seanan View Post
    I posted this on a blog and it was a response to a post. I thought it pertinent here too.

    Here's what I think I'm learning. (Edit: from the Feeler/Thinker/Blog) Neither the "F" nor the "T" is of more value than the other. Neither approach is a choice in its demanded dominance. Its no different than being male or female... they're different, surely, but equal values(parity.) One cannot place value judgements on them nor force one's self into being the other.

    Of course, everyone thinks. Of course, everyone feels. The difference lies in which approach is necessary/required in the individual to be most effective as a human being. To ask an "F" to function as a "T" would disable them into paralysis.... likewise for the "T" trying to be "F." For instance, strong negative emotion does, quite literally, incapacitate me. Perhaps to explain to an "F" I would have to define it as rage which they've surely experienced... rage hinders the ability to think and, consequently, make wise choices. The enraged person is somewhat senseless. For me, as a "T," what an "F" might experience as simple anger interferes with me just as rage would to an "F." So, yes, if I do ever experience anger, I will immediately push it down in order to think. It has, now, become so automatic that I perceive it as not ever experiencing anger.

    This one is pretty easily understood but becomes "murkier" or harder to grasp for an "F" I'm sure when the whole gamut of emotional possibilities are considered... those they might see as more positive emotions... but the same thing occur generally speaking. All I can say is this "pushing down" in order to stay effectively present is an automatic, normal, process. The responses in the face of inhibiting emotion are learned from others. That doesn't mean we're cold, uncaring, people... we just need to stay focused in thought to be effective if we're going to stay connected to/with them. Which is, surely, what we find required by our caring. Caring, for us, lies more in our thoughts about the person and their needs rather than emotional identification or connection with them.
    Beautiful assessment! I might frame that.

  10. #40
    On a mission Usehername's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jennifer View Post
    So at the end of an argument, someone could try to make me "feel better" by saying lots of nice things and apologizing for the conflict... but if the conclusion doesn't make sense, then it still doesn't make me feel better. It continues to eat at me until I can point out what doesn't make sense and have it addressed somehow (even if it's just the other person acknowledging my point and then refusing to agree. At that point, they've acknowledged the inconsistency, so whether or not they want to agree is inconsequential).
    Does this actually help a feeler? I always assumed this was universal.
    *You don't have a soul. You are a Soul. You have a body.
    *Faith is the art of holding on to things your reason once accepted, despite your changing moods.
    C.S. Lewis

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