I think a good example of this is how I dealt with my roommate last year who felt that doing dishes was evil. This was particularly bothersome to me because we were freshman without a kitchen, and I was content to just get paper plates, but she wanted to split the cost of a cheap glass set. So I was fine with it, until moldy dishes began to accumulate in the room.
I definitely wanted to say something and end this once and for all, but I knew she was going through depression and I didn't want to make her feel like I was attacking her. So I brought up the issue in a rather round-about way--I said that I noticed that "neither one of us" was remembering to do the dishes, and so I asked her if she'd help me do half of them (when in actuality they were all hers). Then I mentioned that I was going to get some paper plates/plastic utensils for myself, but that she could keep using the dishes if she wanted.
So, in this sense, I definitely take people's feelings into account when I make decisions, but I don't let them have ALL the say. I mean, I felt pretty crappy bringing it up to her when she was feeling SO depressed already, and I did most of the dishes twice before I finally had it and stopped using them...but I just couldn't let guilt stop me from having a non-disgusting room.
But then again, I'm not a very strong INTJ...my T percentage is about 65% I think.
It's very interesting how the Feelers say they take everything at a personal level...except for one sore spot I have, I really don't take much personally at all, and often feel disconnected from other people...but I don't see that as a negative thing. (Except in romantic situations, which truly ARE the Achilles' heel of the INTJ....I just DON'T know how to turn off the T in that arena...)