Thank you for your insights, everyone. I have been thinking hard over the last few days, remembering back to my "pre-illness" self. I am positive I am "I" and always have been, but I can see how the illness has made me even more so. I am also pretty certain about the "N". Still having trouble with the rest, though!
Metamorphosis, I do think you're onto something about N's appearing as S's when ill due to awareness of physical sensations. I think I mentioned in an earlier post that, on my really bad days, it seems to take too much effort to be intuitive and the sensing just happens. It seems like my head becomes clouded over by pain and I can't think clearly, I just sense and feel.
Elfinchilde, thank you for the info about shadow types! I think that will help me sort through this and figure myself out a bit better. And thanks for sharing about your own struggles with your illness and how it affects you. Very helpful to me and I appreciate it.
Delirious, I am very sorry to hear about your pain and struggles. Especially being told that you are imagining them!
I see myself in your description quite a bit. Perhaps I am a NF? Well, I'm married to an ISTP who thinks I'm overly emotional, even though I don't necessarily think I am... there's a lot of friction between us these days!
What about P/J? I love closure but have a hard time making decisions. I also have some mild OCD tendencies, but I wonder how much of that is actually "me" versus being a coping mechanism to get some control in my life?
in brief--P stands for Perceiving. So generally, a P would be someone who is more spontaneous, doesn't need/like deadlines, prefers to work as-when. More often than not, we are Procratinators.
J stands for Judging. ie, needs plans, routines in order to function. Prefers things closed, neatly, all loose ends tied up. So Js will tend to be more 'fixed' about things, and prefer to stick to plan, whereas Ps will just up and go.
Think back to your natural tendencies, before illness takes over. Cos i think, when one is sick, there needs to be a certain routine, and you're forced to be more J, for instance, in taking medication, avoiding certain foods etc---there can't be that much of spontaneity, devil-may-care attitude in that sense.
Some of the other forumers may be better at giving a clearer explanation of the types though, especially the cognitive functions; that still has me a little stumped.
Edit: not always true that Js are faster in reaching a conclusion. Sometimes, for Ps, we reach a conclusion faster, since it's never quite ended anyway, and you can always change it. but for Js, they may sometimes take a longer while to reach a conclusion, because for them, once they do, there's usually no turning back. Especially so for STJs: the sensory, and rational aspect would mean they consider for a long time, and then make a decision and never look back. NTPs like myself, we make decisions, but are always happy to change it. heh.
You gave me hyacinths first a year ago;
They called me the hyacinth girl.
Yet when we came back, late, from the Hyacinth garden,
Your arms full, and your hair wet, I could not
Speak, and my eyes failed, I was neither
Living nor dead, and I knew nothing,
Looking into the heart of light, the silence.
Under stress, such as that caused by illness or medication, your shadow (opposite) type tends to appear more, but sometimes only on one function. This also varies according to the situation. The challenge is for you to figure out who you really are when not under stress. To do this, I think it would help to imagine what your ideal life would be like if you were unaffected by lyme disease.
This is a very, very late post, considering this thread was started almost a year ago, but I thought I'd chime in anyway because I had a fairly bad case of Lyme Disease. Lyme Disease affects people differently and different strains of it and related bacteria can do different types of damage and cause varying degrees of the illness, so I'll add that mine affected me not only physically (PROFOUND exhaustion--I mean sleeping 20 hours a day, as well as incredible joint paint and muscle issues, among other physical problems), but also mentally (depression, hopelessness, out of mind and out of body feelings--the depression and hopelessness was mostly attributed to feeling like I was dying physically, mentally, and emotionally and not knowing what the problem was and thinking that I was perhaps going crazy because none of the doctors thought Lyme Disease would cause the set of problems I had--they thought it would be strictly joint pain, which I had terribly, but they thought combining the joint pain with my other symptoms ruled out Lyme--that was, until I went to a Lyme Disease specialist and had appropriate comprehensive testing). After two years of being undiagnosed and it progressively getting worse, they figured it out and I went on HEAVY doses of antibiotics (doxycycline) for a year. I have been Lyme-free for almost 4 years now and let me tell you, I did not realize just how sick I was until after I felt better. I almost forgot what it felt like to feel "normal" physically, mentally, and emotionally. So, yes, chronic illness can certainly affect type. To what extent, I'm not sure. I tested INFJ strongly before, during, and after my bout with Lyme. But, I can tell you that when I had Lyme badly, I did not feel like myself at all, so it was tougher for me to identify with one type in particular (and perhaps maybe the reason why I was still strongly INFJ in testing was that I was answering the questions knowing that I was not myself and was basing the answers off of how I was previously).
Pink and I have been sick since our teens, and it does seriously affect our personalities. I'm probably one of the edgiest ENFP's I know - I feel like I should be more buoyant or lighter in heart perhaps, as my instinct, when I'm not feeling as bad, is to be playful and engaged. But, I spend my energy really quickly, so I have to be quiet and still a great deal more than I would normally.
Someone close to me suffered for years and years with chronic illness which undoubtedly effected her 'type' or at least they way she displayed characteristics.. I noticed a gentleness and empathy that wasn't there in uch large doses before... I also noticed that because she had to slow down her hobbies and interests were different.. I would even say that her sensory function was cut off to some extent and so she developed incredible inuition along with great perception...
... couldn't drag me away
Željko Ražnatovic: argus
Željko Ražnatovic: do you want heir's?
Željko Ražnatovic: to carry your genealogical code??