Okay so I'll make it a little less awkward.
List 5 positive and 5 negative values of importance. From there discuss your strongest value of importance and your weakest value of importance.
eg My highest values would be
Positive self belief
Looking after my health
Recreating my confidence
Creating self esteem
Negative self belief
I asked this of my father and his highest was money is lowest wast improving his personality. I asked my mother, after being evasive she said we are, her children and her lowest value was to herself. Then I asked my brother and he said to intelligence and his lowest to, I forgot what he said.
I believe having a positive self belief has a flow on effect, when a person can feel secure about themselves than many of the other values that are positive tend to follow. And then the energy and enthusiasm changes. I think there is a gulf between trying and giving up, success and failure, optimism and pessimism here that is foundational. Whenever I say to myself that I give up I haven't really because I am still breathing. I am still fighting, I am still trying and that means that I have a belief in myself even though my spirit has been trampled on beyond belief. To the point where I saw failure and pessimism as symmetrical in whats wrong with the world. And this limited my enthusiasm towards that which is success and optimism until I had created the foundational basis for positive self belief. This I know could never truly be created in an environment that amplified negative beliefs through criticism and duty which is not the same as being responsible.
Where as this ties in with negative self belief or self image of myself. When I focused on what was wrong with me, what was wrong with my family, what was wrong with the world, what was wrong. I was in effect creating a resistance and a pattern where I was seeing myself as the victim rather than the creator of my life. My family reinforced this with bringing into my attention their negativity and in turn this became my self belief, a warped sense of self, a distorted confidence in trusting myself and others and my security in knowing who I am was under rugs swept. Because my whole being was pulled under me and in turn I lost belief in everything and everyone. Even when I saw the goodness I had a lot of hurt and pain and guardedness because there was such reinforcement that it took me a long time to bring myself to a positive frame of mind and belief in myself when nobody else did in my family.
girlfriend and family including cat
fairness and respect for others
understanding the world we live in, inventing the warp core
time management, professional success, being dutiful and the real construction of my dreams ( you never know how useful a stirling engine in the basement may become )
health, saneness and staying in control of myself
I, myself and making my demands the ruling force in my life
massive amounts of money and status symbols
following the crowd, letting others tailor my world
egocentrism, egoism, selfishness, self-occupation, everything that starts with "self-"
"How dreadful!" cried Lord Henry. "I can stand brute force, but brute reason is quite unbearable. There is something unfair about its use. It is hitting below the intellect." ~ Oscar Wilde - The picture of Dorian Gray
1. Learning - I love to learn new things and pick up new information. While there can be times where I work on mastering something, I tend to enjoy things that take me a little out of my comfort zone. This can also take the form of being a perfectionist as in some ways I'm rarely satisfied with how I did something.
2. Solving problems/puzzles - This is kind of similar to the learning though within a specific frame of reference. I enjoy knowing the answer to questions.
3. Helping people - While this may be a tangent from the previous one in the sense of looking at specific problems, it does generally make me feel good to help others and know I did something useful in their lives. This is also why I'm on various on-line sites where people can post questions like Stack Overflow, Programmers - Stack Exchange, and Career Overflow.
4. Emotional sensitivity - For example, I tend to cry in most of my therapy sessions and even in social situations if any of my triggers are hit. While I may still be trying to figure out why I have this, it is definitely a part of me that I acknowledge and am starting to find some enjoyment in having.
5. Faith - While this may appear to be a belief in a higher power, this is more about how the world works and various life lessons I've seen time and time again that I accept rather than try to prove. The idea of things working themselves out, life being what I make it, and a few other things are a the heart here though I do have faith in God, that isn't quite as important as other things here yet.
As for those things that I value the least, aside from negating the 5 above options,e.g. ignorance would be the negation of the first one to my mind though I'm not sure I see it as useful to state it so I'm trying to find other things:
1. Relationships - I am better at this now and while I do work on this to some degree, I do tend to see this as a deficiency in my life. While in a way I have tended to be rather self-reliant in my life, I am trying to see how others can add to my life through having a connection or bond with them. My mother really sheltered me and spoiled me materialistically as issues for me to overcome.
2. Destructive behavior - While I have had various thoughts of doing some rather evil things, I haven't acted on them and thus this is of little to no importance to me now. This would include things like suicide attempts or destroying someone else's property.
3. Telephone conversations - While this may be seen as something under one, I tend to rarely want to call someone or talk over the phone with people. I do know how to use a phone and have various people's numbers stored on my phone but I'm much more likely to want to send a text or e-mail than have a verbal conversation with someone.
4. Athletic pursuits - While I do exercise for a half hour a day 5 times a week, I do not play sports or have any desire to do so. Granted that I have a Charcot joint, diabetes, heart condition and am morbidly obese as a few things that would be issues to work around, I grew up with a great dislike of playing sports especially if it is in any kind of competitive environment.
5. Country life - I am most definitely a city guy and do not like being out on a farm for more than a few hours at a time. I like having various stores around me, my high speed internet, buildings and other stuff that one finds in the city. Natural settings are a close second here though farms tend to just rub me the wrong way. I just don't like all that open space with plants and animals growing. I enjoy eating meat, not seeing how it came to get to the supermarket to put this into somewhat crude terms.
This was harder than I thought, though it was a fun exercise. Learning is something that I enjoy and have had various stages in my life where I had various subjects be the focus of my intense self-study including psychology and personality information. There have been a few times in my life where I just enjoyed picking something up and then being able to use it to do something cool, though this is generally outside of athletics or arts. On the flip side, I've known for years that I suck at relationships but I am trying to work on that as generally they are a part of most people's lives that aren't hermits.