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  1. #11
    mrs disregard's Avatar
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    I am currently experimenting with being social for its own sake. I am pretty good friends with the people I work with, friends enough to have become friends with them all on Facebook. It's unmarked territory for me, but we do care about each other and I've been invited to outings and such (turned down, both times), so I'm just going to face the fear.

    I want to have a network. I tend to avoid socialising because I'm afraid, and I just won't let it run my life anymore.

  2. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Santtu View Post
    Enjoyable? Lucrative? Waste of time? A necessity to get on with one's life?
    If one is socializing with the people one enjoys spending time with, then it's great. But just socializing with randoms I often view as a waste of time at my age.

    Do you believe that being social, connecting to people and spending time with them is an end in itself? How much of your time would you use for that if given opportunity?
    Yes I believe that being social, connecting to people, and spending time with them is an end in itself. But not with JUST ANYBODY.

    Do you mind that conversation goes on the topics of shopping, bands, celebrities, food, drink, cars, people, houses and jokes?
    I enjoy those kinds of conversations, mostly, except for the "celebrities" part, those are all perfectly acceptable interests. I'm also not big into cars, it's just not my hobby.

    Do you mind that conversation goes in some specialized topic that you DO know of, but it can't sidetrack?
    Huh? Either I listen or get bored if it's something I can't participate in. Question is too vague for me to determine which reaction I'd give.

    When you think of something, i.e. a new find in science, a new building project, anything.. do you first think of
    1) it's social side (i.e. how it is thought of)
    2) it's factual side (i.e. what it is).

    Which one of the two is inherently more important?
    I tend to always look at the social side first, but I think both are inherently important

  3. #13
    Honor Thy Inferior Such Irony's Avatar
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    Enjoyable? Lucrative? Waste of time? A necessity to get on with one's life?


    I don't socialize that much but when I do its mostly enjoyable provided the others share similar interests. I find excessive socializing to be a waste of time but occasional socializing I enjoy.

    Do you believe that being social, connecting to people and spending time with them is an end in itself? How much of your time would you use for that if given opportunity?

    It can be an end in itself and it can also be a means to an another end. Ideally, I'd socialize for fun a couple of hours a week.

    Do you mind that conversation goes on the topics of shopping, bands, celebrities, food, drink, cars, people, houses and jokes?

    I don't mind talking about food, people, or exchanging jokes.

    The other topics I don't know much about or lack interest so I feel like I wouldn't have much of use to contribute.

    Sometimes I like talking about bands. It depends on if the other person shares similar music interests to me. What I dislike are heated discussions about why a certain band is superior/inferior to another band.

    Do you mind that conversation goes in some specialized topic that you DO know of, but it can't sidetrack?

    I'm uncomfortable with the idea that a topic can't sidetrack. On the other hand, I don't like it either when a topic constantly sidetracks so its all about balance.

    When you think of something, i.e. a new find in science, a new building project, anything.. do you first think of
    1) it's social side (i.e. how it is thought of)
    2) it's factual side (i.e. what it is).


    The factual side.

    Which one of the two is inherently more important?

    Well both are important but I'd say the factual side just because if you don't have a solid understanding of the factual side, then the social side doesn't mean much.
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  4. #14
    Member Cephalonimbus's Avatar
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    Enjoyable? Lucrative? Waste of time? A necessity to get on with one's life?
    For me, it's all of the above, except a waste of time. I tend to withdraw and isolate myself more than i should, and socializing keeps me from becoming a detached, crazy hermit. It's something i have to force myself to do every now and then.
    Most of my good friends live outside of town so i don't talk to them very often, but even superficial interaction helps me keep my faith in humanity and retain my sanity... real-life interaction that is -- the internet does the exact opposite
    It has a positive effect on my mood, it's a confidence boost when people respond in a way that indicates they like me and it's also a way to develop my social skills, which are underdeveloped when it comes to initiating conversations.

    Do you believe that being social, connecting to people and spending time with them is an end in itself? How much of your time would you use for that if given opportunity?
    I'd say that the goal is to find people i can connect with on a deeper level and subsequenty to spend time with those people. That's not going to happen without socializing. I'll always need to spend quite a lot of time alone though.

    Do you mind that conversation goes on the topics of shopping, bands, celebrities, food, drink, cars, people, houses and jokes?
    I mind talking about some of those things, yes. Celebrities and shopping aren't things i care about in the slightest and i wouldn't know what to say anyway... i don't even know who most celebrities are or what they're famous for. But i chat with random strangers every now and then, which pretty much always leads to meaningless smalltalk, and i actually enjoy jokes and light-hearted conversation.
    It's not really the topic that matters, it's more the... energy? Just today i had a pleasant talk with a girl at the supermarket... i think it was about bread. I don't even know what we said, and it didn't matter because it was a fun little interaction.

    Do you mind that conversation goes in some specialized topic that you DO know of, but it can't sidetrack?
    Oh i love that, but it certainly will sidetrack. I've already left the computer twice while typing this reply because i had a brainfart and now i'm going to make a sandwich. I like goat cheese.

    When you think of something, i.e. a new find in science, a new building project, anything.. do you first think of
    1) it's social side (i.e. how it is thought of)
    2) it's factual side (i.e. what it is).

    The factual side, usually. It depends whether or not it's an idea regarding a group activity and if it is, what my role in the group is.

    Which one of the two is inherently more important?
    Again, it depends.
    ik sprokkel wat dagen, drop baggage,
    soms heb ik geen zin om die koffers te dragen,
    ik laat los, los het op, word onzichtbaar
    en geef de buitenlucht wat ruimte terug
    dus.. nu zit ik op m'n fiets alsof het niets is,
    maar niets kan toch niet uit zichzelf pedalen laten draaien?

    ~ Typhoon

  5. #15
    Senior Member animenagai's Avatar
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    Enjoyable? Lucrative? Waste of time? A necessity to get on with one's life?

    Enjoyable. I like to express, connect and joke around. I very much like a warm social setting. So yes, I do think it's a necessity, at least for me.

    Do you believe that being social, connecting to people and spending time with them is an end in itself? How much of your time would you use for that if given opportunity?

    Based on my answer on the last question, yes, I do see it as an end in itself. Small talk is never boring for me, as long as we're joking around, which is pretty damn common when I'm around. I like connecting with people in a fun way. I would hope most of my day at school/work etc. would involve some sort of interaction.

    Do you mind that conversation goes on the topics of shopping, bands, celebrities, food, drink, cars, people, houses and jokes?


    Nope, especially not the last one. I make any topic into an opportunity to laugh. Honestly, I don't want to sound pretentious, if you can't find intrinsic value in a good laugh, there's something wrong with you.

    Do you mind that conversation goes in some specialized topic that you DO know of, but it can't sidetrack?

    Nope.

    When you think of something, i.e. a new find in science, a new building project, anything.. do you first think of
    1) it's social side (i.e. how it is thought of)
    2) it's factual side (i.e. what it is).


    If I had to choose I'll say it's 'factual side', but that include extraneous concepts too, such as symbolism and intermediate functional roles it'll provide. If 'the social side' only involves how something is thought of, that will come later, but if it includes the social consequences eg. if it helps develop a capitalist spirit in society, then that comes pretty much straight away too.

    Which one of the two is inherently more important?

    Once again, depends on what the question means.
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