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  1. #61
    morose bourgeoisie
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    My parents were worn out from parenting my older siblings by the time I was born (I'm 8 years younger than my sister). That and my father's severe case of PTSD made them...not really present when I was a kid. I guess I'm saying that they were neglectful in a number of ways.

  2. #62
    Riva
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    Quote Originally Posted by MacGuffin View Post
    But I'd be in the USA, I could've ran off and joined the circus!
    Huh that's a cool idea . The wisdom of an INTP.

    Sorry for derailing folks. Been a while.

  3. #63
    meinmeinmein! mmhmm's Avatar
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    What do you wish your parents had done for you as a child?
    didn't spoil me so much. and perhaps a little less freedom in my mid-teens.

    What did they do which really stands out as significant?
    they provided me with an amazing childhood. i saw the world.
    they gave me the best opportunities so i could do something
    spectacular---without ever defining what that 'spectacular'
    would be, it was always up to me to choose.
    i never doubted their love. ever.
    every normal man must be tempted, at times,
    to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag,
    and begin slitting throats.
    h.l. mencken

  4. #64
    Senor Membrane
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    Quote Originally Posted by JAVO View Post
    What did they do which really stands out as significant?
    Mom was really supportive but not too mothering. That was nice. Nowadays she is kinda friend and a mother at the same time but in a way that I don't feel no pressure to contact her at all, then go there and talk the whole day with her. She's cool.

    Quote Originally Posted by JAVO View Post
    What do you wish your parents had done for you as a child?
    Dad could have been there more. He is too shut up in his own world, I haven't got the slightest idea of what that world is about. If I ever get a glimpse, it is in form of criticism. I only know the things he doesn't like... Well, usually the things he likes are the things expected of men by the society. Quite boring to me.

    But overall, I am pretty ok with everything. I used to be angry about some things, but what does that change..? I accept that there is no way I could have the kind of relationship with my father that would like. I'm not saying this with a sad tone, by the way. It just is as it is.

    One thing, actually, which would have been nice. They could have put me on piano lessons or such. I would love to be able to play something. I've been toying around with a piano some bit but my hands seem to not be able to co-operate too well...

  5. #65
    As Long As It Takes.... Redbone's Avatar
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    What do you wish your parents had done for you as a child?

    Respected the strange, different, but nice daughter they had. That they had my back no matter what. That my father wouldn't have looked right through me like I wasn't there. That my mother wouldn't have been a self-pitying alcoholic. That they would have raised me to be a mature, responsible adult instead of neglecting me and let me do it the very hard and fucked up way.


    What did they do which really stands out as significant?

    Shown me exactly how not to be with my own kids and partner.

    They were both highly intelligent and they exposed us to a lot of things that people in my family and neighborhood did know about or get to do.

    My mother also let me help in the kitchen a lot and that has paid off very well.

  6. #66
    i love skylights's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nolla View Post
    I've been toying around with a piano some bit but my hands seem to not be able to co-operate too well...
    oh yay don't give up!! it takes a little while and a lot of feeling like your hands are uncooperative and then all of a sudden CLICK and you're playing.

    my recommendation would be go and buy a beginner's lesson book if you haven't already and practice for a set time each day, you'll be playing in no time

  7. #67
    Senor Membrane
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    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    oh yay don't give up!! it takes a little while and a lot of feeling like your hands are uncooperative and then all of a sudden CLICK and you're playing.

    my recommendation would be go and buy a beginner's lesson book if you haven't already and practice for a set time each day, you'll be playing in no time
    No, I'm not giving up. Actually I don't do it in order to learn how to play. I can never learn anything by "forcing" myself to learn, and I consider an objective or a schedule in some ways forcing. I am composing a song for fun and learn as a side effect. I have a book that has images of the different combinations of keys, so I can step up on a different level by applying my one-key-at-a-time melody to some combination of the harder stuff. It's fun and relaxed, so I am actually drawn to the piano almost every day. The thing that's bugging me at the moment is that I can't have two hands playing at the same time. I am hoping for the "click"....

  8. #68
    & Badger, Ratty and Toad Mole's Avatar
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    Smile Creepy

    Quote Originally Posted by fidelia View Post
    I already am acquainted with Ratty and Mole and Toad and like them very well. However, I find it odd that you have been on this kick for at least a year. Surely you've already gotten it read. And if everyone's turned you down for it, perhaps it is worth investigating why. Your very insistence makes them less likely to want to. The invitation in this thread seems sort of extraneous and unrelated. And you don't respond to normal back and forth exchange, which makes me want to distance myself. I also notice that your invitations tend to be made almost exclusively towards women, which makes them feel uncomfortable as well. Notice that Rebe already responded and said that the invitation was creepy. Not saying that to be unkind, but if you haven't considered these factors, perhaps it is time.
    In fact two members have been kind enough to respond to my invitation. One a man and one a woman.

    And it worked very well. We read Wind in the Willows aloud to one another over the phone.

    Of course I realise this is a creative invitation open to misinterpretation by adolescents and authoritarian adults obsessed with sex.

    However the overall tenor of reading aloud over the telephone is meditative. It quietens the spirit and opens the eyes.

    I quite understand you feel this is creepy, but perhaps this is more of a reflection of yourself than reality.

  9. #69
    & Badger, Ratty and Toad Mole's Avatar
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    Smile I can hardly breathe with excitement.

    Tonight at 5.30 I am attending a workshop to give me something I wish my parents had given me as a child.

    The workshop is in a beautiful old house in a lovely part of town quite close to me.

    Yes, tonight I am learning to compose on the piano.

    I am not learning to play the piano, I am learning to compose, to create music on the piano for my delight and pleasure.

    I really want to do this so I am a little nervous, but my teacher is well known and a wonderful person. But most of all, she understands creativity and can teach it.

    I have discovered that not only is creativity rare but the ability to teach it is rarer still. In fact most creative writing teachers will tell you straight out that they can't teach creativity - admitting their impotence from the very beginning.

    However those that can teach creativity have a special charisma. And strangely enough they are irresistibly loveable.

    They do share this quality with mystics such as Simone Weil (pronounced Vey) - they seem to be irresistibly loveable. Often this quality is so strong it is perceived as a perfume that envelops the person.

    And just think - in five hours I will be sitting on the same stool as this adorable and loveable person. I can hardly breathe with excitement.

  10. #70
    Senior Member Pixelholic's Avatar
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    NOT made me a neurotic wreck, that would have been nice...
    “You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, and the only way, it does not exist.” -Nietzsche

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