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  1. #11
    (blankpages) Xenon's Avatar
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    There is truth to the idea that difficult experiences can bring out certain traits in ourselves more strongly. But I'm not sure I agree with the statement, "you become more the person you really are". That implies that if you fall apart after a certain event, you were "truly" a weak person to begin with, and if you cope with it admirably and even discover new strengths in yourself then you were "truly" a strong person.

    We're all a mixture of strengths and weaknesses, and adversity can bring out either, or both. It depends on a number of factors, such as the amount of support and positive influences in your life, how motivated you are to push through pain or discomfort rather than avoid it, and what else is going on in your life at the time.

  2. #12
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    marriage cannot be that bad

  3. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Malcontent View Post
    Many many years of familiar problems (several health issues expecially of my parents) but I don't want to talk about this.
    I can respect that, but on the other hand, why make such a bold statement in your OP if you’re not willing to back up your argument?

    Quote Originally Posted by Malcontent View Post
    Btw, the quote doesn't say that you change for the worse, even if it could be a possibility. It says that you become more the person you really were inside.
    Oh I know what the quote says, trust me. So I guess I’ll rephrase my point. You’re claiming that a “big bad event” makes you become more of the person you really were inside. When in fact a "big bad event" can actually make you become less of the person you once were. So your implication means that if a bad event made you become “weaker,” then the person you were truly inside was “weak” to begin with. Sorry… I don’t think so. Its like Whatever said in her earlier post. You can just end up being the burnt remains of who you once were. Not everything that doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. Some things just leave you beat up and damaged.


    Quote Originally Posted by Malcontent View Post
    And for me I think it's true.

    Bye.
    Btw, that’s the second time you’ve made a statement like that with absolutely nothing to back it up with.

    Bye.

  4. #14
    Don't Judge Me! Haphazard's Avatar
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    I thought it was money that made you more of the person you already were, not trauma.



    I guess I'm a fundamentally weak person.
    -Carefully taking sips from the Fire Hose of Knowledge

  5. #15
    not to be trusted miss fortune's Avatar
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    damn... and I thought that it was alcohol!
    “Oh, we're always alright. You remember that. We happen to other people.” -Terry Pratchett

  6. #16
    Senior Member Survive & Stay Free's Avatar
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    In a crisis your shadow might assert itself and you could grow overall from that or you could become ill and traumatised and your reptilian brain/lower brain just takes over and you get stuck repeating trauma.

  7. #17
    morose bourgeoisie
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    Quote Originally Posted by Malcontent View Post
    What's your thoughts about this quote?
    It's in one of the best tv show ever, OZ


    Augustus Hill: (narrating) If you listen to the poets, they'll tell you that a big, bad event in someone's life changes them. If you lose the woman you love or your legs, you suddenly find a kind of beauty inside yourself. That's what they say, the poets. Truth is, you don't. After a big, bad event, you only become more of the person you already were. It's after a big, bad event that you find out the real person you always were inside


    I think it's absolutely the truth.
    I had a good friend who was quite a partier, and turned into an asshole when he got to college. He was in a really bad auto accident that left him paralyzed. He changed a lot from that. He became an advocate for disabled people and a lawyer. He says that it was the best thing that happened to him. Is he glad that he lost the use of his limbs? No, but he gained an altered awareness that he used to his benefit.
    So IMO life is too complex and too various for such statements as the quote above to be true in a global sense.

  8. #18
    Don't Judge Me! Haphazard's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by whatever View Post
    damn... and I thought that it was alcohol!
    No, alcohol just makes you think everything's a good idea. Money gives you the means to do more of what you want to do -- so, you can help people with it, or you can be an asshole and hide behind it. The money doesn't corrupt, it just makes you more of what you were already.
    -Carefully taking sips from the Fire Hose of Knowledge

  9. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by Haphazard View Post
    No, alcohol just makes you think everything's a good idea.
    Haha... that's a good point

    Quote Originally Posted by Haphazard View Post
    Money gives you the means to do more of what you want to do -- so, you can help people with it, or you can be an asshole and hide behind it. The money doesn't corrupt, it just makes you more of what you were already.
    You bring up a good point about the money thing.. You do find out who people are when they come into a little bit of money.. I wish I had some.. Then maybe I can find out who I really am. But no money seems to be coming my way though... only trauma.

  10. #20
    Senior Member Bamboo's Avatar
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    ... Truth is, you don't. After a big, bad event, you only become more of the person you already were. It's after a big, bad event that you find out the real person you always were inside
    I think the bolded concept is flawed and it nullifies everything else. What is the "real you?"
    Don't know how much it'll bend til it breaks.

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