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  1. #1
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    Default Empathic Perspectives

    Lots of heavy stuff going on here that i think is very important to look at...thought it might make for interesting discussion.

    Empathic Perspectives: False Love

    not just this article...check out some of the others too.

    oh and for fun a quiz... What kind of Empath are you? | Quizfarm.com
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

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    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    Default

    quiz results

    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

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    movin melodies kiddykat's Avatar
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    I completely agree with the signs of false love.. I think it's always been a part of my bullshit radar that I feel inside when I see x,y,z from that list when it happens IRL.

    Regarding Empaths and Lynda? *sigh* I think it usually happens when there isn't a clear distinction of boundaries, and the persons involved haven't dealt with unresolved issues that somehow manages to resurface.

    In other words, I think an empath will project their love and leave when they don't quite have an in-depth understanding about themselves, and their motives behind their own actions. It's sort of like an impulsive behavior that she doesn't quite recognize, because the response that she learned is somewhat gratifying.. until- it reaches its breaking point- in the e.g.- she walks out on the guy, and similar scenarios will probably play out into a pattern until she recognizes that cycle, and then decides to break it? That's the impression I get. Perhaps a solution for Lynda would be to ask herself why she's consciously head over heals for that person, and whether or not her attachment is based on a feeling of mutuality, or asymmetry, a need to give love and not receive in return, & whether or not her attachment's associated with the parental figure she had most conflict with? Why and how?

  4. #4
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    have you felt that? have you felt both real and fake and how do you know the difference...for you? if you don't mind me asking...

    this one is interesting too
    Empathic Perspectives: Love
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

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    movin melodies kiddykat's Avatar
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    Great question.. I guess for me, if it feels ingenuine/inauthentic, then I can tell that it's not going to last.

    Ex- if a couple has to overextend or overexxagerate how much they love each other, power control, etc. etc. "Oh I love you babe" (kissing, hugging 24/7, announcing to the world), a feeling as though the bond is forced, hero, protector, savior kind of relationships (imbalance). Basically, I just get this vibe that somehow both partners just aren't being true to themselves, and when a couple lies to themselves, it kinda shows through their nonverbal behavior during their interactions. The truth eventually reveals itself.

    Basically, a relationship based on true love to me (a healthy kind) is more fluid, mutual, natural, and has a sense of innocence and vibrancy about it where the couple doesn't need to *prove* to others or themselves that it is *real.* It's real, because it's real, and they accept one another whole-heartedly for it. There's a sense of peace/completion about the bond that I perceive.

    If this makes any sense, whatsover.. *blush*

    Edit- then again,the topic of love is culturally sensitive. it's not to say that if a relationship isn't based on true love that it won't last. It won't be as quite as a happy union, I guess. Sometimes couples marry for pragmatic reasons where they don't even like each other but stick it out, because they're dedicated- perhaps toxic/unhealthy, but whatever floats their boats. In some cultures, love has different meanings and serves different purposes (as in collectivistic cultures ex- agrarian societies where emphasis is on family/community rather than individuality).

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    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    it does yeah. it is about knowing deep down what's authentic and what isn't...listening to yourself always... even if it's something you don't want to hear for whatever reason...being painfully honest with yourself.
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  7. #7
    Minister of Propagandhi ajblaise's Avatar
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    How about false hate? When an Emotional Empath hates someone for their perceived hate towards them?

    I think I've gotten that before. But I didn't hate them!

  8. #8
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    haha i looked and saw something on hate but it wasn't quite that...maybe it could work that way tho if they truly believed you hated them...what an odd concept. i've never hated anyone.

    here's what this has to say about hate tho if you're interested.
    Empathic Perspectives: Hate
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  9. #9
    Minister of Propagandhi ajblaise's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lady X View Post
    haha i looked and saw something on hate but it wasn't quite that...maybe it could work that way tho if they truly believed you hated them...what an odd concept. i've never hated anyone.

    here's what this has to say about hate tho if you're interested.
    Empathic Perspectives: Hate
    Lady X, I hate you. Truly believe that.

  10. #10
    & Badger, Ratty and Toad Mole's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lady X View Post
    Lots of heavy stuff going on here that i think is very important to look at...thought it might make for interesting discussion.

    Empathic Perspectives: False Love

    not just this article...check out some of the others too.

    oh and for fun a quiz... What kind of Empath are you? | Quizfarm.com
    Widening the question beyond love, the problem is that we deceive ourselves.

    Socrates realised this three thousand years ago and for his pains he was given hemlock, for there is nothing more precious to ourselves than our self deceptions.

    For instance the very word, 'empath', is suspect for not only is it a made up word, it is flattering. And flattery will get you anywhere.

    I can remember visiting the back ward of the Psychiatric hospital, and listening to the delusions of schizophrenics. And being disorientated to hear schizophrenics validating the delusions of other schizophrenics. And this is precisely what we do to one another's self deceptions - we validate them - as it seems only polite and even 'empathic' to validate one another's self deceptions.

    In fact it is socially dangerous not to validate one another's self deceptions - just look at what happened to Socrates.

    But the situation is even worse because our national life is based on group fantasy. And to analyse our group fantasies and ask for evidence is seen as un-Australian.

    Thank heavens we still have free speech and a free press. But today offence is taken by some sections of our community when group fantasies are criticised.

    And today such offence is met by violence across the globe.

    This is beyond sad and is dangerous particularly as nuclear weapons, chemical and biological weapons, not to mention conventional arms and bombs, are falling into the hands of the offended.

    Fortunately we still have the example of Socrates from three thousand years ago, and we have the Enlightenment from the sixteenth and seventeen centuries that sought to replace individual self deception and group fantasies with evidence and reason.

    And today even love is based on mutual validation. And the confidence tricksters declare themselves to be empaths without evidence or reason.

    But when you bet on a horse race, always back the horse called, "Self Interest", because you know they are trying to win.

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