Body Language

[forzen]

So, I finally figured out why I'm socially awkward, reason is because of my inability to read body language. The same feeling a person might feel when feeling his or her way in the dark is the same way i feel when i'm around people, alert because of the unknown. However, I'm far from being shy, Its just I can't read people that well.

So for those who are pros in reading body language, where do I start ?

 

[Fidelia]

Watch to see if the signs people are giving match what they are saying. If they don't, it can mean they are insecure, that they are nervous, that they are strange, that they are uncomfortable around you etc.

Generally people looking around or looking at their watch means they want to go somewhere but can't think of a graceful way to make their exit.

Eye contact and an open body stance or mirroring what you do is usually a sign that they like you and are enjoying the conversation.

Animation of facial features often means that they are losing themselves in the conversation and are having a good time.

Closed body stance (lack of eye contact, folded arms, crossed legs) can mean discomfort, dislike, nervousness or insecurity.

People touching you on the arm during conversation often means that they are expressing empathy, that they are touchy people, or that they like you and are testing the waters.

 

[Quinlan]

I don't know if I really believe in body language, at least not as a reliable method of predicting anything.

 

[Mole]

So, I finally figured out why I'm socially awkward, reason is because of my inability to read body language. The same feeling a person might feel when feeling his or her way in the dark is the same way i feel when i'm around people, alert because of the unknown. However, I'm far from being shy, Its just I can't read people that well.

So for those who are pros in reading body language, where do I start ?

Trying to read body language makes you awkward.

Trying to read body language is an attempt to manipulate the other person.

And it is quite like trying to manipulate a person by typing them.

So trying to read body language or trying to type someone are ways of avoiding the person in front of you.

And of course it is highly insulting and lets the person know in no uncertain terms that you don't like them any more than you like yourself.

 

[Ozz]

Trying to read body language makes you awkward.

Trying to read body language is an attempt to manipulate the other person.

And it is quite like trying to manipulate a person by typing them.

So trying to read body language or trying to type someone are ways of avoiding the person in front of you.

And of course it is highly insulting and lets the person know in no uncertain terms that you don't like them any more than you like yourself.

This is the way the game is played. I personally don't see any reason to fight it.

 

[forzen]

Trying to read body language makes you awkward.

Trying to read body language is an attempt to manipulate the other person.

And it is quite like trying to manipulate a person by typing them.

So trying to read body language or trying to type someone are ways of avoiding the person in front of you.

And of course it is highly insulting and lets the person know in no uncertain terms that you don't like them any more than you like yourself.

Wow, ok i don't know why it would be insulting to be able to read body language and i think it would make conversing with people more enjoyable. I'm not about to Iago anyone, so please quit making assumptions about people that you don't know nothing about . That is all.

 

[forzen]

Watch to see if the signs people are giving match what they are saying. If they don't, it can mean they are insecure, that they are nervous, that they are strange, that they are uncomfortable around you etc.

Generally people looking around or looking at their watch means they want to go somewhere but can't think of a graceful way to make their exit.

Eye contact and an open body stance or mirroring what you do is usually a sign that they like you and are enjoying the conversation.

Animation of facial features often means that they are losing themselves in the conversation and are having a good time.

Closed body stance (lack of eye contact, folded arms, crossed legs) can mean discomfort, dislike, nervousness or insecurity.

People touching you on the arm during conversation often means that they are expressing empathy, that they are touchy people, or that they like you and are testing the waters.

Thanks !

 

[Ulaes]

i thought body language was kind of instinctive/unconscious? i know projecting it is unless you've trained yourself to control it, but i thought being affected by it was too.

i've experimented with body language. i got an inkling that someone standing near me wanted to start talking so i uncrossed my arms and lent back on my arm so my body was starting to face them and they started to speak immediatley.

 

[Jaguar]

Trying to read body language makes you awkward.

Trying to read body language is an attempt to manipulate the other person.

And it is quite like trying to manipulate a person by typing them.

So trying to read body language or trying to type someone are ways of avoiding the person in front of you.

And of course it is highly insulting and lets the person know in no uncertain terms that you don't like them any more than you like yourself.

You are going way overboard here.

 

[forzen]

i thought body language was kind of instinctive/unconscious? i know projecting it is unless you've trained yourself to control it, but i thought being affected by it was too.

i've experimented with body language. i got an inkling that someone standing near me wanted to start talking so i uncrossed my arms and lent back on my arm so my body was starting to face them and they started to speak immediatley.

It is, but some people just gives it more attention than other people. For me, when talking to people, I listen to what the person is saying majority of the time which makes the conversation less interesting if that person has nothing interesting to say.

 

[Mole]

This is the way the game is played. I personally don't see any reason to fight it.

This is true. So I imagine it is all a matter of taste.

Do you find game playing to your taste? Or do you prefer intimacy?

And interpersonal game playing, of course, is designed to avoid personal intimacy.

And in a society where we are all commodities, intimacy is inefficient.

And it is entirely appropriate to type commodities, and entirely inappropriate to type persons.

And most here see themselves as commodities to be typed. So why not you?

And why not follow on and read someone's body language rather than relate to them as another person.

But it is difficult to relate to another person if you see yourself as a commodity rather than a person.

And you are right, it is a cultural imperative to treat ourselves as commodities. And that is why we type ourselves here with all the pride of obedient children.

 

[forzen]

This is true. So I imagine it is all a matter of taste.

Do you find game playing to your taste? Or do you prefer intimacy?

And interpersonal game playing, of course, is designed to avoid personal intimacy.

And in a society where we are all commodities, intimacy is inefficient.

And it is entirely appropriate to type commodities, and entirely inappropriate to type persons.

And most here see themselves as commodities to be typed. So why not you?

And why not follow on and read someone's body language rather than relate to them as another person.

But it is difficult to relate to another person if you see yourself as a commodity rather than a person.

And you are right, it is a cultural imperative to treat ourselves as commodities. And that is why we type ourselves here with all the pride of obedient children.

Peoples perception of reality differs, your perspective is not special nor does it gives you the right to force it upon other people. You type people as sheep who follows the conventional flow of society which contridicts the message of generalizing people as commodities as you are also generalizing, making you a hypocrite.

No one is labeling anyone commodities; your arguement is base on Ethos which has no base or foundation other than yourself and people with similar mentality. Arguement based on Ethos is subjected to logical fallancy, therefore unrealiable within groups with different perspectives of reality.

 

[Bamboo]

The girl in your avatar: her body language conveys a little bit of confusion or expectation (in the arms/shoulders, maybe eyes). Like she's being posed by the photographer, and she's saying: "Raise my hair/arms like this?" while her lower body looks like she hasn't been settled into that pose very long.

Also, it's probably airbrushed, so who knows.

I can't really give much specific advice on body language. I would imagine that "reading" is a skill, and all skills can be developed, but I've read some articles on the subject and it comes across rather stilted. It's very context dependent, as well.

My interpretation above, for instance, is heavily loaded with what I imagine to be the scene - a model being photographed. But stripped down to the basics, all I have is "something funny (incongruent) about her eyes", "looseness in her elbow and wrist" and "fresh in her right leg." All of this is really based on feel more than careful examination. This could be interpreted in many, many different ways.

 

[forzen]

The girl in your avatar: her body language conveys a little bit of confusion or expectation (in the arms/shoulders, maybe eyes). Like she's being posed by the photographer, and she's saying: "Raise my hair/arms like this?" while her lower body looks like she hasn't been settled into that pose very long.

Also, it's probably airbrushed, so who knows.

I can't really give much specific advice on body language. I would imagine that "reading" is a skill, and all skills can be developed, but I've read some articles on the subject and it comes across rather stilted. It's very context dependent, as well.

My interpretation above, for instance, is heavily loaded with what I imagine to be the scene - a model being photographed. But stripped down to the basics, all I have is "something funny (incongruent) about her eyes", "looseness in her elbow and wrist" and "fresh in her right leg." All of this is really based on feel more than careful examination. This could be interpreted in many, many different ways.

All i see is her hotness ...

 

[Bamboo]

Actually, I revise my statement.

At first I saw "heavy" in her lower body, than I edited and said I saw "fresh" and now i see "heavy" again. She's shifting weight off her right leg to her left side, on her butt.

 

[Timeless]

Go people watching.

Try to understand what's going on between people or two, at a bar, in the street, at school wherever.

That's the best way, or read a body language book.


Or do something like this:

Trick question: who is relaxed?

 

[Kingfisher]

body language seems like something you have to determine on the fly, based on the context of the situation. formulas and systems to explain 'signs' seem silly, because they have no context.

i fold my arms A LOT, but i do it when i am very happy and when i am very angry. i do it when i am amped up and excited (in a good way or a bad way), and when i am exhausted.

 

[forzen]

Go people watching.

Try to understand what's going on between people or two, at a bar, in the street, at school wherever.

That's the best way, or read a body language book.


Or do something like this:

Trick question: who is relaxed?

The chick is the one relax. The dude also looks like he's faking his smile. Right?

 

[teslashock]

Just press the subtitles button on the remote control of life. It will translate all foreign languages into the one you understand best, and the translations will conveniently appear right above people's heads. You can even change the font size!

 

[forzen]

Just press the subtitles button on the remote control of life. It will translate all foreign languages into the one you understand best, and the translations will conveniently appear right above people's heads. You can even change the font size!

Great!!! Where do i buy this remote.