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  1. #31
    resonance entropie's Avatar
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    Do I sense sarcasm in that one ?
    [URL]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tEBvftJUwDw&t=0s[/URL]

  2. #32
    Senior Member musttry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wolfy View Post
    As far as presenting a front goes. I think a likeable persons personality is broad. So they put their best foot forward. That is why likeable people tend to have broad interests to draw from. Their thinking is open as opposed to closed.
    I wonder if likeable people have broad interests or if people with broad interests expose themselves to more people who might like them.

    What I'm getting at is that you can't really control who will like you. Some people will; some people won't.

    So when other posters say be "real", I gather it's more about making sure you're alright with yourself and try to be as genuine as possible. Then, people will like you for who you really are instead of a fake. It makes it easier for you to be comfortable and you'll never deceive anyone.

    Bringing it back to MBTI: As a slightly introverted NF guy, I find that extroverted NFs and NTs seem to have the most problem with me. I don't put up with shit and I don't really become admirative of the loud mouths, so they tend to stay away from me. On the other hand, I seem to be able to speak the xSTx language and have quite a few of these as friends.

    Now to speak to a gender issue, I find people of the female species to be very likeable when they have a nice shape, you know nice ... (meh, I know what I like, you can insert your own text) Very likeable!!

  3. #33
    resonance entropie's Avatar
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    To justify one is not a likeable guy by saying: at least I am real and do not deceive anyone, answers in itself why people are likeable.

    Cause noone likes a person without flaws. And that answers the question to the op in 99.9% of the cases. The most liked people are those who one would think of he has flaws oneself has not.

    To actually use that as a weapon to become more likeable would be deception and that one can only justify with saying: but but I am just so confused .

    Society is a sausage, there is no such thing as real friendship, especially for a con man, who even manages to deceive himself.
    [URL]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tEBvftJUwDw&t=0s[/URL]

  4. #34
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    put down the sauce entropie! that is quite enough!
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  5. #35
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    ya, I better go to bed -.-

    gn8
    [URL]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tEBvftJUwDw&t=0s[/URL]

  6. #36
    Iron Maiden fidelia's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wolfy View Post
    As far as presenting a front goes. I think a likeable persons personality is broad. So they put their best foot forward. That is why likeable people tend to have broad interests to draw from. Their thinking is open as opposed to closed.
    Yesss!!! Those broad interests to draw from also allow the person to have more in common with a wider variety of people, which makes them more likeable.

    As far as being yourself - Synarch, I think it's like picking clothes out of your wardrobe to wear somewhere. They're all still your clothes. They all still reflect you. You aren't hiding the fact that you have other clothes in your closet. However, you pick suitable clothes as the occasion calls for it.

    You also may be the life of the party or outspoken or tender or introspective and all of those traits are part of you. However, depending on the relationship you have to someone, you may show varying proportions and intensities of those qualities. (Kind of like having more shades available on your palette when painting, to properly convey what you want the viewer to see. Otherwise you are stuck painting with very unvarying plain colours, without texture or space or intensity to aid you.).

    It seems to me almost that you want people to see you at your most abrasive so that if they can't handle you, you know from the outset. It's a milder form of people who are misanthropic rejecting people before they can be rejected. I think instead, if you assume that people can handle you at your most, then it makes sense to yard out both the bluntness and the tenderness at appropriate increments according to your level of acquaintance. Perhaps that is just the NFJ in me talking, but I don't know why the other would be "presenting a front". While you may censor your thoughts less with someone you know well, it doesn't mean that you don't adjust your behaviour at all for the various other people in your life to some extent. Online, you even relate slightly differently depending whom you are talking to on the forum. This seems to me like it is only an extension of that rather than a grand deception.

  7. #37
    Senior Member Qre:us's Avatar
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    Red face

    Be nice.

  8. #38
    The Duchess of Oddity Queen Kat's Avatar
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    1: I tend not to like "nice" people. Maybe because "nice" people are not always that "nice" to me. They hide their anger, frustration and real personality behind that "nice" mask and whenever I do something wrong that "nice" mask falls off. Then they are the people who make the biggest drama (most of the time) and start screaming and yelling and crying. A lot of people also tend to see that side of their personality as "nice", but I don't like that. I like people who are open about their thoughts. Not those people who try to be "nice" all the time and then burst out into tears when I arrive at school too late.

    2: People who don't always say things at the bad moment. Most people I know say the bad things at the bad moment all the time. For example, when I heard that my mother wanted to divorce my father (that was a few years ago), I got emotional. So I tell others what's going on. What happens? Only one girl says something about that: "Oh my god, that is so great! Yeah, my parents got divorced a few years ago. That's like so awesome! I mean, you should be happy that your mother wants to divorce, because it's so much fun. Seriously. It is. When I grow up, I want to become a lawyer, so that many other people can go and get divorced as well." She said it without any sarcasm. I never ever took that girl seriously again. But, of course, there are many, many other people around here who don't have any social skills either. So they all say the wrong things at the wrong time. I like those rare people who have social skills.

    3: People who give me great advices and who say very wise things that I'll remind for the rest of my life. People who influenced my life in a positive way by telling me useful things tha can be applied in many ways. For example: that kid who told me to "Just do whatever you want to do". That kid really changed my life for the better.

    4: People with an amazing sense of humor.
    I was sitting outside the classroom waiting to go in, and I saw an airplane hit the tower. The TV was obviously on. I used to fly myself and I said, "There's one terrible pilot."
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  9. #39
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    For me what makes me not like a person is when I class them as selfish. If someone acts and speaks in such way that seems that number 1 comes first, I don't get close to them and try to avoid dealing with them.

  10. #40
    Senior Member wildcat's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wolfy View Post
    What makes a person likeable?
    Is there a core trait? Openness?
    Is it a set of traits? If so, what are they?

    What do you think?
    Easy beans.

    LIKE

    similar
    resembling
    analogous
    allied
    parallel
    cognate
    close

    NOT LIKE

    different
    far away
    dissimilar
    not resembling
    YOU

    of Anglo Saxon lician to please < to suit, to match
    < to be like
    YOU

    Gothic leikan, to please
    < to suit, to match <to be like
    YOU

    Swedish likna, to match
    < lik, close; near
    YOU

    Scandinavian loan in Finnish: liki-
    liki-nk < myopia, close-eyedness

    Middle English lich, a corpse
    < a body < samelike, like
    YOU

    German Leiche, body < samelike
    original meaning: form, shape, look, a likeness to
    YOU


    A form is a likeness.
    The idea of form is recognition. A re-cognition: again-knowing.
    Again is an idea of what was before, a match, a likeness, a closeness to what was already.
    What was already?
    YOU were.


    You like people to whom YOU bear a resemblance, a closeness, a likeness of
    form and shape.
    Last edited by wildcat; 11-21-2009 at 11:13 PM.

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