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  1. #21
    Shaman BlackCat's Avatar
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    Q1. As a general rule, I'm always directed towards success and solving the problems. 1- I pretty much never think about success. I just want to be happy. If money comes with that, fine. Money won't make me happy, exploring the world and making bonds with people will. I just so happen to need money for that. As for being able to solve problems, I'm a very good problem solver, but I figured that I misinterpreted what the second part was saying and stuck with being success oriented.
    Q2. As of right now, I'm urgently trying to improve my lot in life. 3- I'm going through a phase of change in my life at the moment, so yes I'm looking to improve things. But it's not too major. I'm just getting signed up for training to get certified in the profession that I want to do (mediation), and getting a job writing. I'm also swapping schools.
    Q3. I often joke about other people's problems. 1- I don't think of other people's problems unless they are close to me, and in that case they are usually taken serious.
    Q4. People should support the good mood in a group. 5- Of course.
    Q5. Life is so unjust, I almost wish I wouldn't have to take part in it. 1- No, if you aren't satisfied with your life, then change it. I see no reason behind letting life bring you down. If you know that it is, change it.
    Q6. I often get depressed from all those terrible things happening to me. 1- Uh, what things?
    Q7. I should be treated with dignity, because I'm a human being afterall. 5- Well yeah, everyone deserves common respect. But I don't think I'm any more special than anyone else.
    Q8. I don't get that depressed at all when discussing dark topics. 3- It varies
    Q9. I wouldn't want to spoil the mood by complaining about my problems. 5- If it's a good mood, then I won't complain.
    Q10. If someone loved me, they would listen to my problems and give me comfort. 4- I generally agree with this, that if I had problems I would appreciate my lover to give me some advice. But I wouldn't want to dump everything terrible in my life on my lover, since I like to deal with my own shit on my own.
    Q11. People should understand how they make others feel with what they say. 5
    Q12. If people want respect, they have to treat others with respect. 5
    Q13. I can't relate to most of the stuff that happy people talk about. 3- Too broad of a question.
    Q14. Happy people don't seem to have any depth. 1- Too subjective. You'd be a very closed minded person to think that EVERY SINGLE happy person was depthless.
    Q15. I can tolerate, even enjoy, a lot of depressive ideas. 2- I prefer not to hear about depressing things.
    Q16. If I'm on a bad mood, everyone should be on a bad mood. 1
    Q17. I cry with those who cry, and I laugh with those who laugh. 4- Generally yes, since I consider myself a social chameleon. Not so much with the crying though.
    Q18. Some people's personal problems are a joke. 3- Too subjective. Some may seem like they shouldn't even be problems, some are legitimate problems.
    Q19. Things often turn out bad in my life. 1
    Q20. As a general rule, I'm a happy person. 5
    Q21. Depressive thoughts are always with me. 2
    Q22. Life is easy enough for me to have happy, carefree mood for the most time. 4
    Q23. I can put my feelings aside when I need to do something important. 5- Absolutely
    Q24. If bad enough things happen to me, I just spill it out and make it known to everyone. 1
    Q25. My mood is a result of things that have happened to me, and I can't help it. 3- It depends
    Q26. I live through my moods very intensively. 2- I can change my moods, I'm not controlled by them.
    Q27. I'm easy to get along with. 5
    Q28. I'm such a burden to other people. 1
    Q29. Take me as I am, or leave me be. 4
    Q30. Other people are there to help me with my problems. 1
    () 9w8-3w4-7w6 tritype.

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  2. #22
    Supreme Allied Commander Take Five's Avatar
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    Q1. As a general rule, I'm always directed towards success and solving the problems. 5
    Q2. As of right now, I'm urgently trying to improve my lot in life. 5
    Q3. I often joke about other people's problems. 1
    Q4. People should support the good mood in a group. 4
    Q5. Life is so unjust, I almost wish I wouldn't have to take part in it. 2
    Q6. I often get depressed from all those terrible things happening to me. 1
    Q7. I should be treated with dignity, because I'm a human being afterall. 5
    Q8. I don't get that depressed at all when discussing dark topics. 2
    Q9. I wouldn't want to spoil the mood by complaining about my problems. 5
    Q10. If someone loved me, they would listen to my problems and give me comfort. 5
    Q11. People should understand how they make others feel with what they say. 3
    Q12. If people want respect, they have to treat others with respect. 5
    Q13. I can't relate to most of the stuff that happy people talk about. 2
    Q14. Happy people don't seem to have any depth. 3
    Q15. I can tolerate, even enjoy, a lot of depressive ideas. 4
    Q16. If I'm on a bad mood, everyone should be on a bad mood. 1
    Q17. I cry with those who cry, and I laugh with those who laugh. 1
    Q18. Some people's personal problems are a joke. 5
    Q19. Things often turn out bad in my life. 1
    Q20. As a general rule, I'm a happy person. 3
    Q21. Depressive thoughts are always with me. 2
    Q22. Life is easy enough for me to have happy, carefree mood for the most time. 1
    Q23. I can put my feelings aside when I need to do something important. 5
    Q24. If bad enough things happen to me, I just spill it out and make it known to everyone. 1
    Q25. My mood is a result of things that have happened to me, and I can't help it. 2
    Q26. I live through my moods very intensively. 3
    Q27. I'm easy to get along with. 4
    Q28. I'm such a burden to other people. 1
    Q29. Take me as I am, or leave me be. 5
    Q30. Other people are there to help me with my problems. 2

  3. #23
    pathwise dependent FDG's Avatar
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    Q1. As a general rule, I'm always directed towards success and solving the problems. 3 - only when I'm dealing with professional and school-related stuff. Not 24/7
    Q2. As of right now, I'm urgently trying to improve my lot in life. 3 - not urgently
    Q3. I often joke about other people's problems. 1 - sounds rude
    Q4. People should support the good mood in a group. 3 - only if they feel like it, but if they do, definitely
    Q5. Life is so unjust, I almost wish I wouldn't have to take part in it. 1
    Q6. I often get depressed from all those terrible things happening to me. 1
    Q7. I should be treated with dignity, because I'm a human being afterall. 5 - hell, I'm an awesome human being
    Q8. I don't get that depressed at all when discussing dark topics. - 2 I don't like dark topics
    Q9. I wouldn't want to spoil the mood by complaining about my problems. - 5
    Q10. If someone loved me, they would listen to my problems and give me comfort. - 2 no I don't want to burden people with my stuff, thankfully I don't usually have anything to say
    Q11. People should understand how they make others feel with what they say. - 5 definitely. but sometimes they can choose not to care
    Q12. If people want respect, they have to treat others with respect. - 3
    Q13. I can't relate to most of the stuff that happy people talk about. - 1
    Q14. Happy people don't seem to have any depth. - 1
    Q15. I can tolerate, even enjoy, a lot of depressive ideas. - 1
    Q16. If I'm on a bad mood, everyone should be on a bad mood. - 1 no but it is more difficult to interact with really happy people
    Q17. I cry with those who cry, and I laugh with those who laugh. - 1
    Q18. Some people's personal problems are a joke. - 1
    Q19. Things often turn out bad in my life. - 1
    Q20. As a general rule, I'm a happy person. - 4
    Q21. Depressive thoughts are always with me. - 1
    Q22. Life is easy enough for me to have happy, carefree mood for the most time. - 4 well no there are also rainy days, I am more...neutral-mooded there
    Q23. I can put my feelings aside when I need to do something important. - 1 not really good at this...
    Q24. If bad enough things happen to me, I just spill it out and make it known to everyone. - 1
    Q25. My mood is a result of things that have happened to me, and I can't help it. - 2 I believe the first part is true, but not the second
    Q26. I live through my moods very intensively. - 1
    Q27. I'm easy to get along with. - 3
    Q28. I'm such a burden to other people. - 1
    Q29. Take me as I am, or leave me be. - 4
    Q30. Other people are there to help me with my problems. - 1
    ENTj 7-3-8 sx/sp

  4. #24
    Plumage and Moult proteanmix's Avatar
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    How much do you agree to each the following statements?
    1: Strongly disagree
    2: Somewhat disagree
    3: Neither agree or disagree
    4: Somewhat agree
    5: Strongly agree

    I can't answer these things anymore but I'll try.

    Q1. As a general rule, I'm always directed towards success and solving the problems. OK, sure.
    Q2. As of right now, I'm urgently trying to improve my lot in life. Strongly agree
    Q3. I often joke about other people's problems. Somewhat agree. I'm a bit strict as to what people define as a "problem." More nuanced answer below at 14.
    Q4. People should support the good mood in a group. If it's one I enjoy then support your local euphoric state.
    Q5. Life is so unjust, I almost wish I wouldn't have to take part in it. Strongly disagree. I like being alive.
    Q6. I often get depressed from all those terrible things happening to me. Agree.
    Q7. I should be treated with dignity, because I'm a human being afterall. Sure, why not.
    Q8. I don't get that depressed at all when discussing dark topics. Not at all.
    Q9. I wouldn't want to spoil the mood by complaining about my problems. Misery loves company! Depends on who the company is.
    Q10. If someone loved me, they would listen to my problems and give me comfort. Strongly agree.
    Q11. People should understand how they make others feel with what they say. Strongly agree. I think that makes your message more efficient. It doesn't necessarily contain itself to mushy wushy feelings.
    Q12. If people want respect, they have to treat others with respect. Agree.
    Q13. I can't relate to most of the stuff that happy people talk about. Disagree.
    Q14. Happy people don't seem to have any depth. Awww, man now I'm gonna have to be an ass. I'm going to say yes with caveats. I think some people can't tell the difference between a happy facade and happy. Happiness comes from within but can be manifested externally. For an outsider to say someone is happy, I'd have to make a lot of presumptions about someone else's internal. Since I'm totally comfortable doing that, let's get to judging!

    To me you can tell when you start talking about those "dark" and "depressive" topics who those are who have experienced these sides of life because the look of knowledge and shadows temporarily darken their eyes. It's the way they talk about that topic, you can tell how much thought has been devoted to it or it reverberating through them. I really connect with that.

    For example, this week some of my coworkers and I were talking about adoption and the conversation veered into the life some kids lead in orphanages, foster care, or as wards of the state. There were two people who outright said "I don't want to talk about this, it's depressing." OK, I could look at it as the subject may have been too raw for them because of personal experience. Knowing these people and having an idea of their habits and patterns, some biographical info, and how they've responded before when conversations get more serious in tone, I really doubt it was because of overwhelming emotional identification. But for the most part, I would say these a pretty light-hearted people that seem happy.

    It seems to me that these "happier" people tend to be of the variety that don't let you talk about Life in 360 (the good and the bad), they tend keep it at a narrower bandwidth because they don't want to dampen their happiness. Which is cool, I've got no problem with that, but it does strike me as shallow. When I do my little experiments to see how open a person is to talking about impersonal darker topics, these people tend to shy away. I also realize that I may not be privy to when they do delve, so my assessment can be offbase, but I'm sticking with it until other information presents itself.

    Q15. I can tolerate, even enjoy, a lot of depressive ideas. Yah, see above, but I like to come up for air and if someone is consistently a Debbie Downer I begin to avoid them because they're contaminating me. So it depends on frequency.
    Q16. If I'm on a bad mood, everyone should be on a bad mood. Strongly disagree. But let's be honest here, I think (or strongly hope) that most people would realize this. Many people say one thing and expect another though.
    Q17. I cry with those who cry, and I laugh with those who laugh. For the most part yes.
    Q18. Some people's personal problems are a joke. LOL, I'm a hardass, so I agree. I see personal problems along a continuum. I just can't see how someone losing their home to foreclosure, losing their job, and then losing their mind is equally as important as a boyfriend not returning a gotdamn text message.
    Q19. Things often turn out bad in my life. I don't know, sometimes you just go through a period in life where you never catch a break. This colors your thinking and if it happens long enough can change your world view and becomes self-fulfilling. There's got to be some sunshine through the clouds to give you the strength to keep going.
    Q20. As a general rule, I'm a happy person. I have no clue how to answer this, which is probably an answer itself.
    Q21. Depressive thoughts are always with me. Agree.
    Q22. Life is easy enough for me to have happy, carefree mood for the most time. This ties into my answer for Q14. From my perspective, being happy is tied to my situation and circumstance. My mood tends to lighten when my situation lightens.
    Q23. I can put my feelings aside when I need to do something important. If it's not anything particularly close to me then it's not a problem. Somethings are too close to my heart to just pound through and git-r-dun.
    Q24. If bad enough things happen to me, I just spill it out and make it known to everyone. Interesting question, I faced this earlier this year when my mother had the strokes. I had to give my job enough information to justify why I was out from work for three weeks, but people keep pressing to know what was going on outside of the "official statement" I'd already given. I felt like I was being forced to spill. I also realize some of this was genuine concern and some of it was outright nosiness. Since I'm not an rude person, I had to figure out a script to tell people that satisfied my need for privacy but assuaged their concern/nosiness. Sometimes people don't understand or respect "I don't want to talk about it."
    Q25. My mood is a result of things that have happened to me, and I can't help it. Agree.
    Q26. I live through my moods very intensively. I don't know, I don't have a good internal thermometer. I know what I feel, I'm not afraid of my feelings or the feelings of others, but I'm not good at measuring the level of intensity of my feelings.
    Q27. I'm easy to get along with. LOL! To some people yes, to others no.
    Q28. I'm such a burden to other people. I hope not but who knows.
    Q29. Take me as I am, or leave me be. IDK, I could stand to change some of my ways and I kind of appreciate nudging when I need to get my act right. I don't mind someone who can visualize a better me, but this is a double-edged sword.
    Q30. Other people are there to help me with my problems. Yes, in the sense that I have an excellent support network of people who care around me and I'm there for them as well.
    Relationships have normal ebbs and flows. They do not automatically get better and better when the participants learn more and more about each other. Instead, the participants have to work through the tensions of the relationship (the dialectic) while they learn and group themselves and a parties in a relationships. At times the relationships is very open and sharing. Other time, one or both parties to the relationship need their space, or have other concerns, and the relationship is less open. The theory posits that these cycles occur throughout the life of the relationship as the persons try to balance their needs for privacy and open relationship.
    Interpersonal Communication Theories and Concepts
    Social Penetration Theory 1
    Social Penetration Theory 2
    Social Penetration Theory 3

  5. #25
    Senior Member Saslou's Avatar
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    I really enjoy your questions ..

    As a general rule, I'm always directed towards success and solving the problems. 4

    As of right now, I'm urgently trying to improve my lot in life.3

    I often joke about other people's problems. 2

    People should support the good mood in a group.4

    Life is so unjust, I almost wish I wouldn't have to take part in it. 2

    I often get depressed from all those terrible things happening to me.3
    I try and find the silver lining.

    I should be treated with dignity, because I'm a human being afterall. 5

    I don't get that depressed at all when discussing dark topics. 3

    I wouldn't want to spoil the mood by complaining about my problems.3
    I usually deal with my problems myself .. Unless major

    If someone loved me, they would listen to my problems and give me comfort. 5 In an ideal world yeah but people have their own problems

    People should understand how they make others feel with what they say. 4

    If people want respect, they have to treat others with respect.5 Hell yeah

    I can't relate to most of the stuff that happy people talk about.1

    Happy people don't seem to have any depth.1

    I can tolerate, even enjoy, a lot of depressive ideas.2

    If I'm on a bad mood, everyone should be on a bad mood. 1

    I cry with those who cry, and I laugh with those who laugh. 5

    Some people's personal problems are a joke. 3

    Things often turn out bad in my life.2
    Not bad just testing .. I suppose that makes life interesting, lol

    As a general rule, I'm a happy person. 5

    Depressive thoughts are always with me. 2

    Life is easy enough for me to have happy, carefree mood for the most time.4

    I can put my feelings aside when I need to do something important. 5

    If bad enough things happen to me, I just spill it out and make it known to everyone. 3 Depends

    My mood is a result of things that have happened to me, and I can't help it. 2

    I live through my moods very intensively. 4

    I'm easy to get along with. 4

    I'm such a burden to other people. 2

    Take me as I am, or leave me be.5

    Other people are there to help me with my problems. 3
    “I made you take time to look at what I saw and when you took time to really notice my flower, you hung all your associations with flowers on my flower and you write about my flower as if I think and see what you think and see—and I don't.”
    ― Georgia O'Keeffe

  6. #26
    A Benign Tumor PoprocksAndCoke's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by proteanmix View Post
    Awww, man now I'm gonna have to be an ass. I'm going to say yes with caveats. I think some people can't tell the difference between a happy facade and happy. Happiness comes from within but can be manifested externally. For an outsider to say someone is happy, I'd have to make a lot of presumptions about someone else's internal. Since I'm totally comfortable doing that, let's get to judging!

    To me you can tell when you start talking about those "dark" and "depressive" topics who those are who have experienced these sides of life because the look of knowledge and shadows temporarily darken their eyes. It's the way they talk about that topic, you can tell how much thought has been devoted to it or it reverberating through them. I really connect with that.

    For example, this week some of my coworkers and I were talking about adoption and the conversation veered into the life some kids lead in orphanages, foster care, or as wards of the state. There were two people who outright said "I don't want to talk about this, it's depressing." OK, I could look at it as the subject may have been too raw for them because of personal experience. Knowing these people and having an idea of their habits and patterns, some biographical info, and how they've responded before when conversations get more serious in tone, I really doubt it was because of overwhelming emotional identification. But for the most part, I would say these a pretty light-hearted people that seem happy.

    It seems to me that these "happier" people tend to be of the variety that don't let you talk about Life in 360 (the good and the bad), they tend keep it at a narrower bandwidth because they don't want to dampen their happiness. Which is cool, I've got no problem with that, but it does strike me as shallow. When I do my little experiments to see how open a person is to talking about impersonal darker topics, these people tend to shy away. I also realize that I may not be privy to when they do delve, so my assessment can be offbase, but I'm sticking with it until other information presents itself.
    I'm not like that at all. I'll initiate conversation about dark topics, because they tend to be the more important ones. I like to look at all aspects of life, and take the bad parts and the good parts. To me, the better books are the well written, depressing ones, because they actually make you feel something. But I think both pessimism and optimism can be shallow, because a lot of the time optimists will only see the good parts, or pessimists will only see the bad parts. And so both look down on each other.
    "In order for the light to shine so brightly, the darkness must be present." -Francis Bacon

    "No matter how dark the moment, love and hope are always possible." -George Chakiris

  7. #27
    pathwise dependent FDG's Avatar
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    Idiotic, proteanmix, that's the right word - not "ass".
    ENTj 7-3-8 sx/sp

  8. #28
    Plumage and Moult proteanmix's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by FDG View Post
    Idiotic, proteanmix, that's the right word - not "ass".
    Why's that? I most certainly hedged my statement with caveats. I find that there's a brand of "happy" people out there who are happy because of sheer obliviousness and willful ignorance towards things that could make them unhappy. They live in their own little happy bubble and ignore anything that would change it. To me that's shallow and just as self-absorbed as the Eeyore's of the world.
    Relationships have normal ebbs and flows. They do not automatically get better and better when the participants learn more and more about each other. Instead, the participants have to work through the tensions of the relationship (the dialectic) while they learn and group themselves and a parties in a relationships. At times the relationships is very open and sharing. Other time, one or both parties to the relationship need their space, or have other concerns, and the relationship is less open. The theory posits that these cycles occur throughout the life of the relationship as the persons try to balance their needs for privacy and open relationship.
    Interpersonal Communication Theories and Concepts
    Social Penetration Theory 1
    Social Penetration Theory 2
    Social Penetration Theory 3

  9. #29
    Senior Member Saslou's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by proteanmix View Post
    Why's that? I most certainly hedged my statement with caveats. I find that there's a brand of "happy" people out there who are happy because of sheer obliviousness and willful ignorance towards things that could make them unhappy. They live in their own little happy bubble and ignore anything that would change it. To me that's shallow and just as self-absorbed as the Eeyore's of the world.
    Or maybe these happy people although aware of what can cause them unhappiness, choose to view life as a challenge that won't beat them. That is not to say they won't be unhappy at times, it is an emotion afterall .. It is down to the individual's perspective on life as to how they deal with the unhappy times.
    “I made you take time to look at what I saw and when you took time to really notice my flower, you hung all your associations with flowers on my flower and you write about my flower as if I think and see what you think and see—and I don't.”
    ― Georgia O'Keeffe

  10. #30
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    Q1. As a general rule, I'm always directed towards success and solving the problems.4
    Q2. As of right now, I'm urgently trying to improve my lot in life.5
    Q3. I often joke about other people's problems.2
    Q4. People should support the good mood in a group.5
    Q5. Life is so unjust, I almost wish I wouldn't have to take part in it.1
    Q6. I often get depressed from all those terrible things happening to me.2
    Q7. I should be treated with dignity, because I'm a human being afterall.5
    Q8. I don't get that depressed at all when discussing dark topics.2
    Q9. I wouldn't want to spoil the mood by complaining about my problems.1
    Q10. If someone loved me, they would listen to my problems and give me comfort.5
    Q11. People should understand how they make others feel with what they say.5
    Q12. If people want respect, they have to treat others with respect.5
    Q13. I can't relate to most of the stuff that happy people talk about.1
    Q14. Happy people don't seem to have any depth.1
    Q15. I can tolerate, even enjoy, a lot of depressive ideas.2
    Q16. If I'm on a bad mood, everyone should be on a bad mood.1
    Q17. I cry with those who cry, and I laugh with those who laugh.4
    Q18. Some people's personal problems are a joke.3
    Q19. Things often turn out bad in my life.1
    Q20. As a general rule, I'm a happy person.5
    Q21. Depressive thoughts are always with me.2
    Q22. Life is easy enough for me to have happy, carefree mood for the most time.4
    Q23. I can put my feelings aside when I need to do something important.4
    Q24. If bad enough things happen to me, I just spill it out and make it known to everyone.2
    Q25. My mood is a result of things that have happened to me, and I can't help it.2
    Q26. I live through my moods very intensively.1
    Q27. I'm easy to get along with.1
    Q28. I'm such a burden to other people.5
    Q29. Take me as I am, or leave me be.4
    Q30. Other people are there to help me with my problems. 3

    shit...i kept getting confused
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

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