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  1. #21
    Senior Member proximo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wolfy View Post
    I find it very mechanical to go through my values. It feels very unnatural.
    Yeah, you're lucky there - I feel the same way if I'm asked to explain the promptings of intuition For those of us not as plugged into their F as you are, though, this has to begin as a laborious and academic process before it can blossom into anything like the natural value based judgements that people like you can so easily make in situations where logic is useless and people like me stand around feeling vulnerable and panicky.

    Edit - Bloody typical though. Supposed to get T's talking about how to get in touch with their values, and so far only one T has responded amongst the F's that come to gloat! Except Night, but he doesn't count - he was just being a butt-munch
    I'm male and over 30, FYI.
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  2. #22

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    Quote Originally Posted by Victor View Post
    In that case I would advise you to wait.

    Waiting for the right moment is very Japanese. So I think you should follow the lead of those around you and wait.

    In the meantime you may practise tatemae and honne, exquisitely Japanese values.
    Waiting for the right moment is very Japanese. I have absorbed a lot of Japanese cultural values, including honne and tatemae.

    I couldn't list my values in order of priority for the life of me though.

    It's very cold today.
    I think I'll just wait and see, with a cup of green tea...

  3. #23
    Retired Member Wonkavision's Avatar
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    Not sure what order I'd put em in, but here are my 5 core values:

    Honesty, Authenticity, Integrity, Self-Reliance, and Wisdom.
    __________________


    I'M OUTTA HERE.

    IT'S BEEN FUN.

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    PEACE OUT!!!


  4. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by proximo View Post
    Does that mean "core values" is another way of saying "my favourite good things out of all the good things there are that I know of"??
    I think so, yeah.

    Quote Originally Posted by proximo View Post
    But anyway, I've thought of another one for me: authenticity.
    That's one for sure, congratulations!

  5. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by wolfy View Post
    It's very cold today.
    I think I'll just wait and see, with a cup of green tea...
    Perfect.

  6. #26
    Senior Member proximo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wonkavision View Post
    Not sure what order I'd put em in, but here are my 5 core values:

    Honesty, Authenticity, Integrity, Self-Reliance, and Wisdom.
    Interesting... how would you differentiate between honesty and integrity, though? I see them as much the same thing.

    Though, I tend to see Telling the Truth as a different sort of sub-species of Honesty. You know, like I don't see telling the odd survival lie, expediency lie or diplomatic white lie or even those lies we all tell (except ISxJ's, obviously) when we fill in forms, as barring a person from being called Honest.
    I'm male and over 30, FYI.
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  7. #27
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    Yeah, telling the truth always is just silly... And it might even break some more important value.

  8. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wonkavision View Post
    Not sure what order I'd put em in, but here are my 5 core values:

    Honesty, Authenticity, Integrity, Self-Reliance, and Wisdom.
    But no bloody cavalry charges.

  9. #29
    Senior Member proximo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nolla View Post
    I think so, yeah.
    But that seems like an absurd framework basis for major decisions! That's like choosing life options like a kid in a candy store. Yeah, there's red rope liquorice, peppermints, chocolate, caramel and nougat - well, I don't like nougat or peppermints, and caramel's my favourite out of the ones left over, so I'll take that! Yum! Ha ha little sis, you've got to have smelly old peppermints!

    There's integrity, authenticity, diplomacy and family - well, the first two might involve conflict and I don't like that, and family justifies diplomacy so I'll go with that! Yum! Ha ha cousin, you think I really like you and that you don't get on my nerves, but you do-ooo!

    That's one for sure, congratulations!
    Thanks. I think I need to have a stiff drink now!
    I'm male and over 30, FYI.
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  10. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by proximo View Post
    But that seems like an absurd framework basis for major decisions! That's like choosing life options like a kid in a candy store. Yeah, there's red rope liquorice, peppermints, chocolate, caramel and nougat - well, I don't like nougat or peppermints, and caramel's my favourite out of the ones left over, so I'll take that! Yum! Ha ha little sis, you've got to have smelly old peppermints!
    It does seem a bit random. But I think it works somehow like that. Say, I value independence and close relationships, the values are somewhat in conflict. No worries, I can easily see that I don't really value independence that much. Problem solved. So, if I take ALL the values I can think of, it is only about giving them a proper order. I haven't actually done that, as it seems unnecessary.

    But, if it wasn't like this, then I should say that there are some of the good things that are my anti-values (couldn't think of a better word), things that I run away from, things that I wont do. But this is silly, why would I not like to do a good thing?

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