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  1. #1
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    Default Destroying people's belongings rather than people.

    Curious about other's thoughts on this.
    A person doesn't want to harm someone else's physical body, so instead they destroy things that belong to the person they're upset with.

  2. #2
    Iron Maiden fidelia's Avatar
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    How about neither? Usually there's a good way to get out long before it escalates to that point.

  3. #3
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    I think it's still abuse. Instead of harming people physically, mental abuse is in progress. What goes on in their mind? Are they destroying the things while personifying onto these things the characteristics of the person to whom they belong to? Being upset can easily turn into anger when unattended. This way the anger is still channeled towards the person they're really angry at.

    There's a fine line that can easily be crossed and eventually the anger might turn into physical abuse. It's important to realize that and get help to work things out before it turns into something ugly.
    Last edited by Phantonym; 11-08-2009 at 08:22 AM.

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    Just cause you won't physically harm them, doesn't mean they won't harm you physically when they see what you did to there shit.

  5. #5
    Senior Member NewEra's Avatar
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    Generally, it is meant to get back at people in a way that seems more harmless than physically hurting people. Physical harm is a more direct and literal form of harm, and thus seems more severe. And it is usually used when people display more excessive feelings.

  6. #6
    Senior Member LostInNerSpace's Avatar
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    Who are you really angry at when you are "angry at someone"? If you think about it you're only ever angry at yourself. You create anger, happiness, depression. The other person might do something you don't like but they don't actually create that state of anger inside of you.

    Let's say for argument sake ice cream makes you happy and hint dropping makes you really, really mad.:steam:

    So today, right now in fact, you are feeling happy because you are eating ice cream and nobody is dropping unseemly hints.

    There are 6.7 billion people in this world. How many of those people do think at this very moment are dropping unseemly hints? Why aren't they making you angry? If you eat enough ice cream you're ass will grow so large people in the not too distant future will drop hints that you should not eat so much ice cream. A flight attendant might drop the hint that you should not board a plane. What made you happy not so long ago now makes you angry.

    But why does hint dropping make you so angry in the first place? Sounds like you feel violated by the hint. Like they should not have done it and because they did you feel completely out of control and it was the worse thing in the world. This suggest an underlying problem. That you are not assertive enough to bitch slap the hint dropper in the first place.

    You create your happiness, anger and a whole lot more. Therefore you should destroy you own property if you are angry.

    Hint dropping ticked me off not so long ago. I realized I had to be more assertive with verbal bitch slappings.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by LostInNerSpace View Post
    This suggest an underlying problem. That you are not assertive enough to bitch slap the hint dropper in the first place.
    The underlying problem sounds more like deep insecurity over inability to read cues, notice things or see it coming, which translates into the perception that people who attempt indirect communication are being passive-agressive.

    Or it just sounds like somewhere in the back of your mind, you are clear about the potential effects of ice-cream that you chose to ignore in favor of hedonism, but the guilt is building up, which explodes in the form of anger at the slightest hint that you might be over-doing it.



    On hindsight I should respond to the topic as well. Assuming that there's no sentimental value attached to the objects, the impact will be minimal. If there is sentimental value attached to the objects, the psychological impact can potentially be more devastating.

  8. #8

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    Quote Originally Posted by Chimerical View Post
    Curious about other's thoughts on this.
    A person doesn't want to harm someone else's physical body, so instead they destroy things that belong to the person they're upset with.
    I'm not sure I've ever seen a point in destroying or hurting someone for the sake of it. You can discourage certain things, try to stop them acting in certain ways that are harmful, avoid conflict, but why break them or their stuff? If it comes to the point where it can be resolved no other way, get out of there or avoid them rather than making them try to change or vanish.
    Freude, schöner Götterfunken Tochter aus Elysium, Wir betreten feuertrunken, Himmlische, dein Heiligtum! Deine Zauber binden wieder Was die Mode streng geteilt; Alle Menschen werden Brüder, Wo dein sanfter Flügel weilt.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Chimerical View Post
    Curious about other's thoughts on this.
    A person doesn't want to harm someone else's physical body, so instead they destroy things that belong to the person they're upset with.
    Or things that belong to themselves even.. If I am threatened.. or someone repeatedly rubs my sores spots over and over again.. I can blow-up..
    And once I feel that much under threat. survival instincts take over,and they say attack the threat.
    With some measure of humanity left , you act on the instinct.. But not on the source of threat.

    It's release..

    I hate getting to that point.. and only in really toxic places does it happen.. A few times in my life it got past that point and the consequences were grim..

    The moral.. Run before toxicity breaks you..

    I would like to add.. this not a spiteful .. "destroy their stuff when they are not around" kind of thing.. I mean during the heat of the moment.. when things are TOXIC and fear is strong

  10. #10
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    I think it's a release of some sort. But it's still unhealthy and has doses of passive-aggressiveness and.... uuuh, cowardice around.

    Because when I think of destroying other people's belonging, I see masks of "it's not you I am angry with" and hidden, secretly destroying and watching them squirm over "NOO MY STUFF". I still think confronting people, is the better way to solve problems.

    But let's assume one did confront and, in angryness, decided to destroy the other party's belonging instead of verbal bashing or punching them in the process. That, I could accept. Perhaps there's a conflict of "I don't want to hurt people" or so, but then.... it has its own problems too.

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