One of the rules from NLP.
The Meaning Of Your Communication Is...
... what the other person understands.
... and the response you get.
In other words, it doesn't matter what you intended to say. The meaning of what you said is what the other person takes it to mean - how they interpret it.
And that will impact the response you get.
This means you have to pay attention to the response of the other person, to check they "got" what you were trying to say.
I think it is a really useful way to think. Although I must admit I'm pretty crap at it. Do you agree this is the best way to maintain control in your communication? Do you think in another way?