Obviously a hell of a projection, but how universal are those shocks to marriage in particular? And would you think that it would be as much of an issue for NP and I?
NP isn't like that, I can say that. I've been planning our wedding and she wasn't interesting in talking about it at all (I'm not doing anything until I know it's happening!). In under 24 hours of me proposing, we now have visited family, told friends, arranged meetings with the restaurant we want, picked best man, talked to him, picked maid of honor, talked to her, set our budget, decided our priorities, talked political strategy with our families...I think I understand that. To be honest, I am still told that I don't "talk enough." I very much will wait until an idea is formed/finished in my head (as much as I can) until I let someone else know about it; but most people in relationships seem to feel better / feel more included if they are part of the formulation process.
Well, you get the idea. J kick in, P whimper.
... That's just plain scary. I'm going to have nightmares now, thanks.You could just do it at home. (You just need a good pair of scissors, and some duct tape!)
Ah, breaking of stereotypes and all that... Hmmm, I could see that being of value, always.The part of the discussion that helped me the most was that the man was a big introverted geek. Way more rigid than Don so probably an ISXJ and his wife told me that sometimes you just have to take the book out of his hands and sit on his lap and that cooking, etc wasn't the big deal to men that people made it out to be.
Helps a lot Just curious as to where you saw the advantages and where it didn't help. A lot of it seems to be very situational - We're older, more established, more life planning. We talked out a lot of the issues already... It doesn't seem like something that I can say we certainly need... But I do see the stereotypes and the blind spots as an issue. Sadly, those things I can't evaluate, otherwise I'd solve... but isn't that the point of it? I guess soI don't know if that helps at all?