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  1. #11
    Protocol Droid Athenian200's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ptgatsby View Post
    Heh, I wish. No, it was just verbal and it wasn't major. I can't let it go though, either... so when that cognitive dissonance ended, I made it a goal to understand how it had happened to me.
    Well, that's nothing to worry about. I've verbally bullied people more often than I care to admit. Although usually I try to be more diplomatic. And it isn't like I've never gotten mad enough to physically hurt someone, although I feel really, really, bad and self-loathing for several days if I do that.

    So verbal bullying doesn't prove you're an S. Sorry.

  2. #12
    Senior Member ptgatsby's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by athenian200 View Post
    Well, that's nothing to worry about. I've verbally bullied people more often than I care to admit. Although usually I try to be more diplomatic. And it isn't like I've never gotten mad enough to physically hurt someone, although I feel really, really, bad and self-loathing for several days if I do that.
    I think it was traumatic to me because I saw myself a certain way - someone who would never do what others had done to me. However, once I moved beyond the black-white stage of life and I realised what I was doing, it more or less crushed part of my identity. The recovery from that... well, I never fully recovered. It brought a rather large loss of self, of ego... and it drove me to understand myself and others.

    The problem is, if I remember correctly, you have a higher neurotic rating. It sounds to me more like you lashed out, whereas I actually took on the bully role.

    So verbal bullying doesn't prove you're an S. Sorry.
    Hmmm, just to be clear, I don't really care at this point anymore

  3. #13
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    I was introduced to it awhile back by my mother, but I continued to explore it on my own - mainly to figure myself out! I was always a mystery to myself and others as a child and MBTI sheds some light on who i am. Furthermore, it helps me accept and work on my negative qualities.

    I like theory in general. I like to pick it apart, study it's components, and work it all into some complex system. It's fascinating to me.

    People fascinate me, despite my introversion. I'm especially interested in interactions between people and how to make them as diplomatic as possible. I enjoy understanding others.

  4. #14
    insert random title here Randomnity's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by athenian200 View Post
    Well, that's nothing to worry about. I've verbally bullied people more often than I care to admit.
    For the record, I would much, much rather have been physically bullied as a child than the verbal bullying I got. That's probably weird, but I never minded getting banged up.

    I'm probably misunderstanding you, I guess I'm just bristling a little at you saying that being intentionally mean to people is "nothing to worry about".

  5. #15
    Protocol Droid Athenian200's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Randomnity View Post
    For the record, I would much, much rather have been physically bullied as a child than the verbal bullying I got. That's probably weird, but I never minded getting banged up.

    I'm probably misunderstanding you, I guess I'm just bristling a little at you saying that being intentionally mean to people is "nothing to worry about".
    Well, I guess I've always been able to sort of ignore a verbal insult, because I know the following:

    1. Reacting badly to it is what they want me to do, and it won't do me any good.

    2. I may be able to use it to guilt them later on.

    3. Even if they don't like me, I can use it to make them look bad.

    4. If I don't react to it, and the person is a bully, they're less likely to continue to pursue that course of action if it doesn't successfully agitate me.

    So when someone insults me, they're not really hurting me... now, attacking me on the other hand would be a frightening problem.

    It's probably the difference between Ni and Se. You're a lot more sensitive than I would have thought. I'll have to reconsider my idea of SP's as aggressive... because what's aggressive to me is nothing to them, and what's nothing to me is aggressive to them. Amazing that two people could be so different.

    Come to think of it, I seem much more bothered when I see someone hurting another person's feelings than when someone attacks me personally. (although I don't really care for either.)

  6. #16

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    A bit off topic, but what constitutes verbal bullying?

    I think personal attacks on particular people or their traits may be contrued as verbal bullying.

    I don't believe, I've participated in that. But I have used plenty of strong language that others sometime finds offensive (I don't mean cursing).

    Where do you draw the line?

    Accept the past. Live for the present. Look forward to the future.
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    "[A] scientist looking at nonscientific problems is just as dumb as the next guy." Richard Feynman
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  7. #17
    Protocol Droid Athenian200's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ygolo View Post
    A bit off topic, but what constitutes verbal bullying?

    I think personal attacks on particular people or their traits may be contrued as verbal bullying.

    I don't believe, I've participated in that. But I have used plenty of strong language that others sometime finds offensive (I don't mean cursing).

    Where do you draw the line?
    Well, I think it would include cursing. But it can also involve jeers and mocking, pointing out a person's flaws unmercifully, and spreading rumors about the person.

  8. #18
    Furry Critter with Claws Kiddo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by INTJMom View Post
    To understand and accept myself.
    To improve myself.
    To understand and accept others.
    Same here.

  9. #19
    Senior Member ptgatsby's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ygolo View Post
    A bit off topic, but what constitutes verbal bullying?
    I think in this case verbal means more non-physical. That's because it comes out in all sorts of styles - that group of girls laughing and pointing, the jock yelling in your face, the relentless comments in the hall or just social isolation.

    I agree with Randomnity, I would of preferred physical more than the rest, although I got some of both and they both really suck.

    I think personal attacks on particular people or their traits may be contrued as verbal bullying.
    It can be, but bullying is more about style than content. It needs to be degrading and isolating.

  10. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by athenian200 View Post
    I know that I've been studying them for a long time, but I wonder exactly what would contribute to it for others? I can tell you what it is for me:

    1. To understand myself.

    2. To know a little about a person's self-image/personality so I have a better idea how to deal with them, and understand them.

    3. It's fascinating and intricate, with so many variations and ideas.
    Mainly it's very useful in management situations where you have to deal with other people's way of interaction. Although to be honest, I think studying personality is an entertaining form of solving puzzles- however those who use it to study their neuroses- are probably in the majority demographic who mainly like self-help books: such as How To Become A Stud In Real Life, How To Be The Most Wanted Girl In The World or Why My Father and Mother Hated and Bullied Me As A Child etc. You won't believe how unbelievably best-selling these inane things are.

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