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  1. #1
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    Default Narcissistic Personality Disorder

    Has anyone ever interacted with a narcissist?

    Narcissism 101: Welcome to Narcissism 101

    If so, what kind of an impact did they have on your life? And how did you react?

    Should narcissism even be considered a disorder?

  2. #2
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    Yes.

    I feel very frustrated and discouraged after my interactions with him. Everyone else I know hates him and won't even bother talking to him.

    I often react to him by trying to help change his mind about things or get him to see things from different points of view. I don't know if it does any good at all. It usually feels like I'm banging my head against a brick wall, and he really grates on my nerves. You kind of have to tell yourself not to get angry, because he says really angering things. When he begins insulting me or my intelligence, I stop the conversation and let him know why I stopped it in the hopes that he'll avoid that type of thing in the future. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.

    I don't know why he acts the way he does. I'd like to understand it better. I honestly think he's got good qualities, somewhere inside.

    I don't know if narcisissm should be considered a disorder or not. I'm not really informed enough to comment on that part.
    I-71%, N-80%, F-74%, P-96%

  3. #3
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    If we perceive by making distinctions, then the distinction between the narcissistic personality and the Narcissistic Personality Disorder enables us to see.

    They are very easy to confuse because they sound almost the same - but they are quite different.

    The narcissistic personality will most likely have a successful life. In fact the narcissistic personality is found often among successful CEOs.

    However Narcissistic Personality Disorders lead unsuccessful lives. They lead disordered lives.

    And Narcissistic Personality Disorders lead unhappy lives and they become more unhappy as they get older. And old age becomes a little hell for those with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

    And where narcissistic personalities are often happy and successful leaders, those with Narcissistic Personality Disorder are constantly seeking, "narcissistic supply". They are constantly and relentlessly seeking admiration from others.

    But no amount of admiration can satisfy them - so they are constantly, constantly seeking admiration.

    And it is important to remember for your own safety that Narcissistic Personality Disorders think your needs and wants and values are completely unimportant - unless they can use them to elicit more admiration from you.

    And Narcissistic Personality Disorders are a real trap for young players.

    For they are very difficult to help - some say impossible. Partly because they can see absolutely nothing, nothing at all, wrong with them. And immediately resent any imputation that there may be and that they might need help.

    However the Narcissistic Personality Disorder is very impressive on first meeting. They appear to be truly wonderful people. And they believe they are truly wonderful and want you to believe they are truly wonderful. It's just that they want you to think and say they are truly wonderful, all the time.

    So the narcissistic personality is just a personality like any personality, while Narcissistic Personality Disorder is a mental illness.

    However for the sane, our problem remains making the proper distinctions.

    And just as we often confuse sympathy and empathy, we usually confuse the narcissistic personality with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

    So our first job is to bring order to disorder in our own minds, then we are in a better position to care for those with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

  4. #4
    Senior Member sculpting's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Victor View Post
    If we perceive by making distinctions, then the distinction between the narcissistic personality and the Narcissistic Personality Disorder enables us to see.

    They are very easy to confuse because they sound almost the same - but they are quite different.

    The narcissistic personality will most likely have a successful life. In fact the narcissistic personality is found often among successful CEOs.

    However Narcissistic Personality Disorders lead unsuccessful lives. They lead disordered lives.

    And Narcissistic Personality Disorders lead unhappy lives and they become more unhappy as they get older. And old age becomes a little hell for those with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

    And where narcissistic personalities are often happy and successful leaders, those with Narcissistic Personality Disorder are constantly seeking, "narcissistic supply". They are constantly and relentlessly seeking admiration from others.

    But no amount of admiration can satisfy them - so they are constantly, constantly seeking admiration.

    And it is important to remember for your own safety that Narcissistic Personality Disorders think your needs and wants and values are completely unimportant - unless they can use them to elicit more admiration from you.

    And Narcissistic Personality Disorders are a real trap for young players.

    For they are very difficult to help - some say impossible. Partly because they can see absolutely nothing, nothing at all, wrong with them. And immediately resent any imputation that there may be and that they might need help.

    However the Narcissistic Personality Disorder is very impressive on first meeting. They appear to be truly wonderful people. And they believe they are truly wonderful and want you to believe they are truly wonderful. It's just that they want you to think and say they are truly wonderful, all the time.

    So the narcissistic personality is just a personality like any personality, while Narcissistic Personality Disorder is a mental illness.

    However for the sane, our problem remains making the proper distinctions.

    And just as we often confuse sympathy and empathy, we usually confuse the narcissistic personality with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

    So our first job is to bring order to disorder in our own minds, then we are in a better position to care for those with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

    Victor is correct here-the person I know with NPD looks initially successful on the surface however he has a very odd, spotty job history and his relationships with family and friends is very disparate and scattered.

    Avoidance is the very best thing you can do. By normal psychological methods and counseling there is little you can do to help these people-basically you run damage control behind them. If you end up as a source of their "supply" you end up feeling wasted and broken yourself.

    They lack empathic recipricocity. They project a beautiful picture of love and caring, wait for your emotional response and then move on once they have gotten thier "fix" leaving you alone, waiting for a return on the emotional investment you made...

  5. #5
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    For a second I thought that I may be narcissistic, but then I realized that there is a difference between narcissism and introspection. And that I generally am the shit, simple as that.

    However, my reading on the topic did help me to identify my ex as a true narcissist.

    We were together for six miserable years so I can tell you all about the negative side the personality.

    From a relationship perspective the person is incapable of any empathy or compromise. In order to work on a balanced level the narcissit's, its all about me, throws a chain reaction on the other end to be all about you, otherwise it really is ALL about them. Because the narissist cannot view the world from any other perspective, you cannot say things like "that hurts my feelings" because they won't care. If you need compromise in a relationship, you have to say "what you are doing is going to hurt YOUR feeling" as the relationship takes on a punishing parent to disobediant child attitude.

    The nacissist will only look at how things affect them. Its like they mentally tapped out a five and never realized that the world does not revolve around them. The are constant victims instead of being self perceived as failures. Fix everything in a narcissistic life, and if they hold onto their self depreciating esteem they will start to blame you for anything they feel is the reason they suck. Basically they will turn on you in order to remain in a position that absolves them of responsibility.

    When dealing up close with narcissits, one has to hold a very strong personality in order to not get sucked into their games they play with others as well as themselves. You must be fair yet authoritarian, as that is the only way to produce any form of positive feedback from them, and even then, expect them to become insecure due to the fact that you seemed to have the answer, and they did not.

    My ex used to tell me " the only way I'll pay attention or learn anything is if shit hits the fan". This is the perfect summary of the narssisist. They only budge if they become uncomfortable. Otherwise its a steady stream of self motivated, premature, and ignorant actions that fuel their need, as someone already said, for constant validation.

    They are also the royalty of false promises with out any follow through. No one really interacts with a narcissist, only outside of them. I recommend against actively engaging these types of people.

  6. #6
    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    I have a parent with NPD, and it's not pretty. I've had to have surgeries in later years to repair broken bones that didn't reset correctly - all because someone was too busy getting ready for a party to bring me to the hospital and wrapped me up with a gauze bandage instead.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by jenocyde View Post
    I have a parent with NPD, and it's not pretty. I've had to have surgeries in later years to repair broken bones that didn't reset correctly - all because someone was too busy getting ready for a party to bring me to the hospital and wrapped me up with a gauze bandage instead.
    This sounds pretty serious - I mean broken bones are serious.

    But what may be even more serious is the emotional hurt and damage.

    We imagined jumping out of an aeroplane together. And perhaps this is a way of addressing the hurt and perhaps hidden emotional damage.

    And it is interesting we had a joke about the parachute failing just as your parent failed.

    And falling to the earth would mean broken bones.

    And perhaps there is the hope that this time you won't be wrapped in gauze but be looked after properly and taken to hospital.

    And I do think it is important you are looked after properly.

  8. #8
    Senior Member prplchknz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jenocyde View Post
    I have a parent with NPD, and it's not pretty. I've had to have surgeries in later years to repair broken bones that didn't reset correctly - all because someone was too busy getting ready for a party to bring me to the hospital and wrapped me up with a gauze bandage instead.
    Broken bones? I understand if it's like a bruise or something minor and even then I'd get ice. But broken bones, that's terrible. Of course when my friends cut themselves or injure themselves in a minor way then the proceed to whine, I look at them and go "are you dying?" but they're grown, they should be able to put ban-aids on themselves or get ice from the freezer. Now if their seriously injured yeah I'll probably be more sympathetic.
    In no likes experiment.

    that is all

    i dunno what else to say so

  9. #9
    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    Victor, you are so sweet to want to look after me.

    I've been through a lot worse situations than a few broken bones and I've also been wonderfully blessed with fabulous situations. All of these things define me and my lifestyle choices, definitely, and they are not hidden. But I've dealt with the anger a long time ago. I've let it go. The anger that was directed at them is now just pity and sadness for them. I used to see them as omnipotent, but now I just see them as horribly broken.

    And you just equate jumping out of planes with broken bones because you don't want to join me. Nice try!! Hahaha...

  10. #10
    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by prplchknz View Post
    Broken bones? I understand if it's like a bruise or something minor and even then I'd get ice. But broken bones, that's terrible. Of course when my friends cut themselves or injure themselves in a minor way then the proceed to whine, I look at them and go "are you dying?" but they're grown, they should be able to put ban-aids on themselves or get ice from the freezer. Now if their seriously injured yeah I'll probably be more sympathetic.
    The thing with NPD is that the person cannot understand that you feel anything. Just simply doesn't get it and doesn't care. My mother can't stop herself, it's not even her fault. As her mother lay dying in the hospital bed, we were gathered around to say goodbye. She took that time to tell her mother about the fantastic dress she found for the funeral.

    She couldn't help it if she tried.

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