When someone is suicidal, this gives them an immediate power card over everyone who cares about them. I spent many years alongside someone who was suicidal and because of this, everyone immediately catered to this person in a desperate attempt to quell off this severe depression. Their feelings were of greater value than everyone around them because they were in a state of emergency. There was an underlying fear to ever offer criticism, get into just a regular spat, constant fear if they withdrew they had done themselves in. People constantly pleaded to consider some more positive alternatives to thinking, reminding them they always have someone to turn to, etc. Being in a clinical depression, this person would throw off every attempt at help as useless and wasn't inclined towards medical help either.
I have loved such people and 'tried' to be a source of support. But i never offered the basic suggestions to help clarify their thinking. For example, this person from my past believed all the problems would be fixed if they simply had someone to love. Because they saw the responsibility for their happiness as resting on another person, they would sabotage social interactions by obviously placing way too much emotional pressure immediately. People would tend to run. It was a horrible catch-22. This person was admirable and worthwhile, but their insistence on self-destruction and that help could only come from a lover gave them a power card i don't think they even were aware they were playing.
It's tragic, and important. I have no idea how to negotiate through this type of minefield. I've had to try and i come out with a lot of guilt, confusion, regret, and yet no clear idea of what i 'should' have done.
Anyone share this type of experience and have success?