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  1. #11
    Senior Member wildcat's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ThatsWhatHeSaid View Post
    Alright. I had written a fabulous post, but I waited too long and got logged out, so now I'm going to just write a summary.

    I don't think you have a disorder, though you might have some depression going on. The label is not as important, as everyone else has already pointed out. Understanding what's going on is the most important thing.

    In my opinion, you don't have a disorder, but are just a sensitive person. I think you're sensitive to people looking down at you as having a problem, or being incompetent, or being defective, and you respond with both 1) logical argument and 2) frustration/anger. I'm going to bet that you're constantly trying to work around this sensitivity by A) projecting an image of exaggerated confidence, B) continuously looking out for moments where people get close to looking down at you, and C) react very defensively when people try to talk to you about sensitive subjects. The result is, you annoy people with (A), you are UNAVAILABLE to connect to people on a natural, every day level because of (B) and you push people away with (C).

    I'll admit that I only based this on read about 8 of your post in only 2 threads, but that's my assessment.
    Yes.
    There is something you neglect, though.

    The first round of things.
    The beginning of the story.

    You are correct.
    Only after the event.

  2. #12
    Senior Member uberrogo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chimerical View Post
    [and all the research I've done on relationships, attraction, intuition, subconscious, and a few minor studies related to the issue points to a problem with me. I do everything correct but people still toss me aside once they get this vibe from me]

    Relationships are all about animal instinct. Studying up to do the "proper" thing is counter-productive. Your insticts already know what to do. Bite the back of her neck and get to it. Treating a relationship like a homework assignment is unromantic and is probably somewhat robotic. They are probably all picking up on that. You seem to be suffering from INXJ-itis.

    Side note: You may have broken pheremones.
    If Men's Health magazine was true, you would never need to buy more than one issue.

  3. #13
    Senior Member ThatsWhatHeSaid's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wildcat View Post
    Yes.
    There is something you neglect, though.

    The first round of things.
    The beginning of the story.

    You are correct.
    Only after the event.
    What event would that be?

  4. #14
    Occasional Member Evan's Avatar
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    aspergers?

    (i have absolutely no idea by the way.)

  5. #15
    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    Maybe you think too much about it and it gives off an air of desperation, or an air of controlled behavior. Have you tried relaxing and just letting things run their course with friends? Also, do you actively pursue friendships? I mean, some people probably just don't call you because they think you may be standoffish, since you don't call them - do you know what I mean?

    How old are you, if you don't mind me asking?

    Believe me, in life, there is someone for everyone. You will find your place.

  6. #16

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    Quote Originally Posted by jenocyde View Post
    Believe me, in life, there is someone for everyone.
    Really? I don't believe it.

    As for disorders, you may have over-abstract disorder.

    But seriously, you should get your depression checked out by a professional (a psychiatrist, not just a counselor). Letting depression fester can lead to very awful things in the future.

    Accept the past. Live for the present. Look forward to the future.
    Robot Fusion
    "As our island of knowledge grows, so does the shore of our ignorance." John Wheeler
    "[A] scientist looking at nonscientific problems is just as dumb as the next guy." Richard Feynman
    "[P]etabytes of [] data is not the same thing as understanding emergent mechanisms and structures." Jim Crutchfield

  7. #17
    Senior Member NewEra's Avatar
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    Sounds like plain old depression to me. You should just seek out those people who were your friends but left later on. Maybe you can be happier if you do that.

    Quote Originally Posted by Kalach View Post
    Maybe this topic should end but I have a thing I want to say about it because it resonates for me, the part about people getting close and then running off.

    I have found that too. I make friends with people and after some time they're not there any more, and I wonder where they went and feel disappointed. I haven't found it to be something wrong with me though, just something disappointing. I have sometimes wondered if I could be more appealing... somehow.
    I have found sort of the opposite for me. I make friends with people, and I'm the one who isolates from them later on. But for your case (and for Chimerical's), if it bothers you, why don't you just talk to the people who were previously your friends?

    Quote Originally Posted by Evan View Post
    aspergers?

    (i have absolutely no idea by the way.)
    No, I highly doubt it. His/her symptoms don't match that.

  8. #18
    morose bourgeoisie
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    It sounds like you have 'checkmated' yourself. None of the life preservers have worked, yet you still are drowning...

    I've been there, more than you know. the only really useful thing I can offer you is that you must do things you dont normally do. In order to break free form this way of thinking, you have to do something for yourself that you have not done before.
    For me, one thing was exercise. I bought a bike, and started to ride it. It helped me lose some weight, but more importantly, it improved my mood. I also reduced the amount of caffiene ingested, and so I slept better. This helped my mood too. There are probably a few things in your life that you are blind to that could be changed. Really look at your habits, and make a disciplined plan. Remember: what one person can do, another can do. You are not defective. Not at all.

  9. #19
    Senior Member sculpting's Avatar
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    Chimy, I posted some thoughts in your blog and I will post more later. What you feel is VERY real and please do not let us dismiss it as we dont always understand what you are thinking.

    The things you describe are VERY, VERY real and I would suggest an anti-depressent and a long talk with a counselor at the very least. Rather than isolate yourself try and remember that in some way each of us in connected to one another. We may never speak, we may never see each other's face, but through our words and our feelings, thoughts, and visions, we are connected. You are part of that connection, a part of that sparsely connected, intangible human family. You are connected to each of us and you are a part of our family. When you feel at your most alone, try and think about those connections and the love those folks feel for you. Remember that we care for you as well.

    You have beauty inside of you and it is much appreciated. Keep chatting with us and big hugs. Pm anytime if you want to chat more and sorry if the above sounds corny.

  10. #20
    Senior Member Priori's Avatar
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    You don't have a mental disorder.

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