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  1. #1
    Senior Member MrME's Avatar
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    Default Seasonal Depression

    This time of the year, near the end of Winter, I start to feel a little down on myself. Does anybody else experience this, and if so, what do you to combat it? I have all kinds of full-spectrum lightbulbs at home, but they're not helping any more.

    I tend to get overly critical of myself and others. Unfortunately, this manifests itself online as well as off, so if I say something asshole-ish, please point it out. I don't mean to be this way.

    This behavior leads to "worry loops." I'll say something mean-spirited or just plain thoughtless and get a negative reaction. Then I'll obsessively guilt myself over it until I become mentally incapacitated.

    *sigh* Hate this.
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  2. #2
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    aww...i know what you mean a lil bit. for me it's the staying in too much and i don't really realize it until i find i'm just being grumpy...bring on the spring please!
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  3. #3
    Senior Member ThatsWhatHeSaid's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MrME View Post
    This time of the year, near the end of Winter, I start to feel a little down on myself. Does anybody else experience this, and if so, what do you to combat it? I have all kinds of full-spectrum lightbulbs at home, but they're not helping any more.

    I tend to get overly critical of myself and others. Unfortunately, this manifests itself online as well as off, so if I say something asshole-ish, please point it out. I don't mean to be this way.

    This behavior leads to "worry loops." I'll say something mean-spirited or just plain thoughtless and get a negative reaction. Then I'll obsessively guilt myself over it until I become mentally incapacitated.

    *sigh* Hate this.
    I would combat it by 1) taking responsibility for your actions and refusing to lash out at people or push their buttons even though it soothes your depression and
    2) taking the asshole-ish persona and using it AGAINST the critical voices, telling them to STFU and demanding respect in a very firm and serious voice.

  4. #4
    Senior Member MrME's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by erinavery View Post
    aww...i know what you mean a lil bit. for me it's the staying in too much and i don't really realize it until i find i'm just being grumpy...bring on the spring please!
    Thanks for the hug, erin.

    I never got hit with seasonal depression until I moved back to Minnesota from California. The Winters here can really wear on you once you've been someplace with good weather year-round, even a homebody like myself.

    My ESTP roommate gets hit with it REALLY hard, so I can't help but wonder if I'm also absorbing her depression a bit.

    Seriously, though, the warm sun can't arrive soon enough.
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  5. #5
    Shaman BlackCat's Avatar
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    I'm actually the opposite. I thrive in the winter time, I actually want to get out of my house. I get depressed when it gets too hot to do anything. I'm usually forced to stay in the house or otherwise socialize.
    () 9w8-3w4-7w6 tritype.

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  6. #6
    Senior Member MrME's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ThatsWhatHeSaid View Post
    I would combat it by 1) taking responsibility for your actions and refusing to lash out at people or push their buttons even though it soothes your depression
    Okay, maybe I needed to be clearer. I don't intentionally lash out to make myself feel better. I don't intentionally lash out at all, ever. I always try to be mindful of what I'm saying and how I say it ... this failsafe is just much, much weaker when I'm under a lot of stress.

    When I do catch myself before I've said something critical, I will censor myself. But, I don't always catch it until it's already said and done. When I do catch it after-the-fact, I will guilt myself out for doing it ... which deepens the depression and makes me even worse.

    "Lash out" might be a bit extreme for this discussion, but we'll use it for the sake of brevity.
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    Senior Member MrME's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BlackCat View Post
    I'm actually the opposite. I thrive in the winter time, I actually want to get out of my house. I get depressed when it gets too hot to do anything. I'm usually forced to stay in the house or otherwise socialize.
    Aw, man, that sucks. I never realized that summer could affect somebody this way.

    California pampers you. Oakland and San Francisco were almost always between 40 and 80 degrees, although there was an occasional 100+ summer day -- but they weren't so bad because, yup, it was a dry heat.

    Of course, there are earthquakes on occasion.
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  8. #8
    Senior Member ThatsWhatHeSaid's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MrME View Post
    Okay, maybe I needed to be clearer. I don't intentionally lash out to make myself feel better. I don't intentionally lash out at all, ever. I always try to be mindful of what I'm saying and how I say it ... this failsafe is just much, much weaker when I'm under a lot of stress.

    When I do catch myself before I've said something critical, I will censor myself. But, I don't always catch it until it's already said and done. When I do catch it after-the-fact, I will guilt myself out for doing it ... which deepens the depression and makes me even worse.

    "Lash out" might be a bit extreme for this discussion, but we'll use it for the sake of brevity.
    Hm. I think this happens subconsciously in most people, where they strike at people because they get off on seeing them suffer. I'm making it sound like a horrible thing, but I do it myself. I'm just being blunt about it.

  9. #9
    Shaman BlackCat's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MrME View Post
    Aw, man, that sucks. I never realized that summer could affect somebody this way.
    My sinuses are weird, when it gets too hot or too dry I get nosebleeds. When it's a combination I really just want to stay in my house. I have long hair, and the feeling of hair sticking to your neck due to sweat is just a no no, I hate it. That reason alone makes me not want to do anything in the summer time. I also hate the summer because it seems like no matter how hard I try to cool off I always end up still being hot. In the winter time, all I have to do is put on a coat and I feel fine. Nothing like a crisp mountain winter around here. Oftentimes in the winter I'll go on my favorite hikes and walks, but in the summer I peek outside, my face gets fried and I withdraw back into my house.

    I know I'm weird for this, but I really like the whole dead trees look. There's nothing like an extra cloudy (but not rainy) day and seeing all those dead trees, everything looks delightfully dreary. Also when it's winter my pollen allergy doesn't kill me. Just thinking about it makes me want to go outside.
    () 9w8-3w4-7w6 tritype.

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  10. #10
    Senior Member MrME's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ThatsWhatHeSaid View Post
    Hm. I think this happens subconsciously in most people, where they strike at people because they get off on seeing them suffer. I'm making it sound like a horrible thing, but I do it myself. I'm just being blunt about it.
    That's no worry. I don't think I function this way. Lashing out is extremely disconcerting to me, it means there is something seriously wrong with me. I thrive on harmony and good relations, even with people I'm not particularly fond of.

    Although, yeah, I will occasionally feel some schadenfreude if I witness or read about some form of poetic justice against a particularly corrupt individual. (*cough cough* BLAGOJEVICH *cough cough*)
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