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  1. #61
    Senior Member Anja's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Victor View Post
    We perceive by making distinctions.

    And the more distinctions, the more we see.

    And if we don't learn new distinctions, we blind ourselves.

    The distinction between sympathy and empathy is more than 3,000 years old.

    It is well worth learning.

    But there is enormous resistance.

    So it is the resistance that is most important.

    What is the resistance?
    I make a guess that in some cases it is a sense of false pride. Fear underlying it.
    "No ray of sunshine is ever lost, but the green which it awakes into existence needs time to sprout, and it is not always granted to the sower to see the harvest. All work that is worth anything is done in faith." - Albert Schweitzer

  2. #62
    Senior Member alcea rosea's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Victor View Post
    Sympathy feels good. It feels good to sympathise. And it feels good to be sympathised with.

    And when we feel good, it is natural to think we are good.

    But sympathy is poisonous. Sympathy is the white sugar of the emotional world.

    Sympathy means to feel the same as, so sympathy adds nothing, like sugar.

    Sympathy only reinforces what we are feeling.

    Sympathy does not allow the feeling to flow and develop into other feelings.

    Sympathy is uniquely unhelpful.

    Yet it is the norm to seek sympathy here.

    Which leads to nastiness when we don't feel and think the same.

    Are we addicted to the white sugar of sympathy?

    Yes.
    So what?

  3. #63
    reborn PeaceBaby's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Victor View Post
    Thank you for your interest and thank you for asking me to share my thoughts.
    You're welcome.

    Quote Originally Posted by Victor View Post
    ...So empathy doesn't come naturally, it must be learnt and practiced like reading and writing.
    Agreed; thanks for taking the time to walk through that. I would agree that empathy is a learned skill, but some people are more attuned to provide it than others.

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