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  1. #31

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    I'm a 4w5, but got the emotional comfort thing in a weird way as ENFP. My mood normally floats between interested, bored and some Zen thing. People used to say, "you mean you actually have negative emotions and get down about stuff?!?!" hehe
    Freude, schöner Götterfunken Tochter aus Elysium, Wir betreten feuertrunken, Himmlische, dein Heiligtum! Deine Zauber binden wieder Was die Mode streng geteilt; Alle Menschen werden Brüder, Wo dein sanfter Flügel weilt.

  2. #32
    Queen hunter Virtual ghost's Avatar
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    I understand what you are saying about environment's emotion not affecting you because of the observation of another person that I was referring in my previous post in this thread. You are built that way and I'm built so that I'm almost hypersensitive about the emotions in my environment. It's very hard for me to be different and for you to be different.

    Why do you care what they say? You are what you are.
    I do accept "non feeling" (I don't mean here that they don't have any feelings/emotions...) people because I find them very calming compared to my moods even if their lack of emotions (and it looks like it but doesn't necessarily mean that) can bother me at times.
    That is true, I can heve very calming efect on people.

    Why should I care?

    Maybe I don't need people emotionally that much but I need them in practical things.
    To tell you the truth I didn't care. And look where it got me.
    I never had one of those really close friendships. When it comes love, sex and romance I haven't moved a single step from a pure zero what is unusual for mid 20s. I don't cry at all (litterally) etc..

    The thing is that I have developed into a person which compatibility with others is quite low. The fact is that there is something known as a border of good taste.
    So I am working on reducing this to at least some degree.


    What I find interesting about EFs is that they can be very accepting on "paper" but if their mood changes because something really bad happened they can be quite disturbed by things they would overlook otherweise.

    That is why I am looking for some explanations on this since it is somehat unusual that someone can transform its logic that much.



    I disagree. Being social has to do with empathy which has to do with emotions and feeling what other people are feeling. Without empathy there is not too much cooperation. That's what I think anyway.

    But I do think this might be a gender diffenrece, a bit at least. I mean, long ago, the female had to be more empathical because they were doing the stuff at the home cave in cooperation with other females (raising kids etc.) and the men were hunters. Quite different skills and needs for these different "jobs". A hunter with empahty doesn't kill anything.

    Oh well, this is all my own speculation and, thus, shouldn't be taken too seriously.
    Well, I would be suprised if you agree.
    The thing is that Te can replace feelings to some degree and you can use common sense to figure out when you make people uncomfortable.

    That is why I said that they are not exactly the same thing.

  3. #33
    Senior Member alcea rosea's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Antisocial one View Post
    That is true, I can heve very calming efect on people.

    Why should I care?

    Maybe I don't need people emotionally that much but I need them in practical things.
    To tell you the truth I didn't care. And look where it got me.
    I never had one of those really close friendships. When it comes love, sex and romance I haven't moved a single step from a pure zero what is unusual for mid 20s. I don't cry at all (litterally) etc..
    Then I can say you have lost something people usually enjoy (I mean close friendships etc). But if you are ok with that, then there is no problem, I think?

    The thing is that I have developed into a person which compatibility with others is quite low. The fact is that there is something known as a border of good taste.
    So I am working on reducing this to at least some degree.
    Maybe you aren't so much as you think. Maybe it's all in you, I mean, people sense that you don't want to interact with them even if they would like to know you a little bit better?

    What I find interesting about EFs is that they can be very accepting on "paper" but if their mood changes because something really bad happened they can be quite disturbed by things they would overlook otherweise.
    I can see what you mean. I do agree to a certain level
    .
    I myself am very moody in a sense that I'm usually never calm, I'm either quite "happy" or quite angry. Actually I can look very calm outside but my brain is never calm. Anyway, when I get really angry, people hear that, people see that and sensitive people will probably feel that emotionally. But the difference here is that my anger is not usually towards them. So, they shouldn't bother about my emotions when angry because I'm not openly angry to anybody I don't know too well. I mean my husband gets his share but that is a sign that I trust him and can show my negative emotions to him.

    What I'm trying to say here is that yes- EF's can be emotional but it's not that they would be angry about you. You should just let their emotion pass and then they'll be fine.

    That is why I am looking for some explanations on this since it is somehat unusual that someone can transform its logic that much.
    I understand you want to understand it but it's not possible. I mean it's not logical, rational or anything like that so you really cannot rationally discover the deepest meanings of people's emotional behavior.

    Well, I would be suprised if you agree.
    The thing is that Te can replace feelings to some degree and you can use common sense to figure out when you make people uncomfortable.

    That is why I said that they are not exactly the same thing.
    No, Te cannot replace feelings at all. That is a mistake many T's do and I've heard that before. Feelings cannot be rationalized that way. It's a huge mistake.

  4. #34
    darkened dreams labyrinthine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Antisocial one View Post
    What do you think is the biggest engine of mood swings in you?
    How does it feel to have one of those swings?
    Would you change this trait if you could or at least weaken it?
    Low blood sugar and/or over-exhaustion.

    Basically when I don't feel well physically it is easier to feel anxious or depressed or to interpret events in a more negative light. I would certainly prefer to do without such experiences. As people go, I don't think I am particularly moody. At least when I am I can see it and tend to apologize during the episode, so I don't really take my own bad mood as that serious or legitimate.
    Step into my metaphysical room of mirrors.
    Fear of reality creates myopic morality
    So I guess it means there is trouble until the robins come
    (from Blue Velvet)

  5. #35
    Queen hunter Virtual ghost's Avatar
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    Then I can say you have lost something people usually enjoy (I mean close friendships etc). But if you are ok with that, then there is no problem, I think?
    In a way it wrong to say that I have lost it since in kindergarten I was already and clearly thet most asocial kid in the group.


    I can see what you mean. I do agree to a certain level
    .
    I myself am very moody in a sense that I'm usually never calm, I'm either quite "happy" or quite angry. Actually I can look very calm outside but my brain is never calm. Anyway, when I get really angry, people hear that, people see that and sensitive people will probably feel that emotionally. But the difference here is that my anger is not usually towards them. So, they shouldn't bother about my emotions when angry because I'm not openly angry to anybody I don't know too well. I mean my husband gets his share but that is a sign that I trust him and can show my negative emotions to him.

    What I'm trying to say here is that yes- EF's can be emotional but it's not that they would be angry about you. You should just let their emotion pass and then they'll be fine.
    I am glad that you see my point. But I think that you don't see the whole story. I don't mind that they get emotional. The thing is that they get frustrated with me since I am not even trying to match their emotional state. The fact si that don't get excited over a problem so people (not just EFs) can take this as an insult.



    I understand you want to understand it but it's not possible. I mean it's not logical, rational or anything like that so you really cannot rationally discover the deepest meanings of people's emotional behavior.
    I am not so much in the search for deep meaning as for explanations of everyday examples of this kind os behaviour.


    No, Te cannot replace feelings at all. That is a mistake many T's do and I've heard that before. Feelings cannot be rationalized that way. It's a huge mistake.
    Who said anything about rationalizing of feelings?

    I think you are wrong, not completly but mostly. The reason why I think that is because people want to interact with you and me for a different reasons.
    So I can handle a social situations without a need for too much Fe and I don't go into social situations that need alot of Fe.

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