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  1. #1
    Senior Member Silent Stars's Avatar
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    Default question about a possible cause of depression

    I came across this on a different forum I'm on, and I thought I might be able to get additional insight on it here. I've heard many similar things to it before as well.
    Seratonin becomes unbalanced for an emotional reason. Is it possible to be born with a seratonin imbalance? Well, do you believe that an unborn child in the third trimester of pregnancy can not sense the mother's emotional state or receive the mother's chemicals through the umbilical cord? Ever heard of a baby being born addicted to cocaine?
    Seeing this reminded me of something....

    My mom told me something rather...disturbing a few months ago. She said that while she was pregnant with me, she was having a lot of very powerful thoughts that I was going to be the child of Satan, and she was extremely depressed...she was deathly afraid...and not only having strong suicidal thoughts, but having thoughts of killing me right after I was born as well.:sad:

    As far as I can remember, I've been depressed my whole life, though for most of it, I pretty much completely repressed it, to the point where I felt very little emotion at all (I'd laugh once in a great while, but that's it.). Only during the past...four years or so, have I actually been able to really experience emotions, so really, it's all quite new to me...which makes all the good stuff, very good, but consequently, all the bad stuff (which there is a lot of) is even worse. Once I started being able to feel emotions, I slowly began to realize just how strong my depression was, and the more progress I made with being able to feel emotions in general, the worse I would get when I was feeling down. I've been getting better at dealing with it, so that it doesn't affect my personal life and the things I need to do as much, though I'm still very much all over the place; when I'm happy, I'm incredibly happy, but...well, you get the point. Even when I am happy, I can still feel it there, in the back of my mind, waiting for a chance to come out again.

    I have many of the symptoms of major depressive disorder, and I've talked to a therapist as well, and she said I very likely have it, as well as anxiety problems. I've never been able to control it....the bad episodes (like where I feel like I'm practically dead) happen at completely random intervals (even when my overall situation in life at the time would not give me any reason to be depressed; it could happen once a month, or a couple times in a month, or several months apart, who knows...), and I never know how long it will last (at the very least one day, usually a few to several days; absolutely nothing that I do makes it go away, and thinking positive [which I'm very good at since I'm naturally quite optimistic] never helps either, only the passing of time gets rid of it). I sometimes have a lot of trouble with sleeping as well; I either can't get to sleep until really late, or I'll wake up a ton of times while I'm sleeping (even though normally I'm a very deep sleeper), or I'll sleep for some ridiculous amount of time (anywhere from 12 to nearly 18 hours; one time when I was in college, I slept for almost 40 hours and woke up only a few times very briefly. I was extremely depressed toward the latter half of the year I spent there.).

    Do you think that what my mom was going through while she was pregnant with me caused it, or at least affected it somehow? I mean, at the time, it must've been very serious, cause when she told me about it, she was totally in tears.
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  2. #2
    Senor Membrane
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    Quote Originally Posted by Silent Stars View Post
    As far as I can remember, I've been depressed my whole life, though for most of it, I pretty much completely repressed it, to the point where I felt very little emotion at all (I'd laugh once in a great while, but that's it.). Only during the past...four years or so, have I actually been able to really experience emotions, so really, it's all quite new to me...which makes all the good stuff, very good, but consequently, all the bad stuff (which there is a lot of) is even worse. Once I started being able to feel emotions, I slowly began to realize just how strong my depression was, and the more progress I made with being able to feel emotions in general, the worse I would get when I was feeling down.
    This feels almost like you copy-pasted it from my life. Except that I was a happy kid, then went into a similar emotionless state. I don't know if depression can be inherited like that, but in my case it wasn't. It was more like, the things I took for granted were destroyed one day and my mind built a defense for that.

    But, now it's been ten years of emotions and I am doing ok, I can see it as a positive experience. So, I think it will become easier with time.

  3. #3
    Protocol Droid Athenian200's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Silent Stars View Post
    Do you think that what my mom was going through while she was pregnant with me caused it, or at least affected it somehow? I mean, at the time, it must've been very serious, cause when she told me about it, she was totally in tears.

    I have heard a theory that this can happen with girls, but I've never heard it suggested that it could affect boys.

    I suppose it's possible, but there are so many other possible reasons for it that I'm hesitant to say that's it.

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    Senior Member Anentropic IxTx's Avatar
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    About serotonin - supposedly I have an imbalance of it. I've heard that it plays a part in perception of justice, and I've always been very adamant about justice [in fact, my real name means justice ], and I'm quite a reserved person as well...

  5. #5
    Was E.laur Laurie's Avatar
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    I'm sure your mom had pregnancy induced depression/psychosis.

    I think it makes sense what you are suggesting. It also is possible it is hereditary.

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    reborn PeaceBaby's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Silent Stars View Post
    My mom told me something rather...disturbing a few months ago. She said that while she was pregnant with me, she was having a lot of very powerful thoughts that I was going to be the child of Satan, and she was extremely depressed...she was deathly afraid...and not only having strong suicidal thoughts, but having thoughts of killing me right after I was born as well.:sad:
    That must be a heavy load for you to carry. I hope it hasn't been too painful to think about. I'm curious why your mom felt compelled to tell you; perhaps she feels a need to help you and to reach out to you in your dark moments. At any rate, I can feel your need to try to make sense of this and place it in the right context for your life.

    I don't know the answer as to whether babies could have a "dark cloud" emotionally (ie a serotonin imbalance) from the womb. Personally I would not believe it to be so; a baby gets what it needs from the mother, not the other way around. Mother nature's system is designed to ensure survival of the baby. (Of course, this DOES NOT mean that you personally caused your mom's distress, so let go of any guilt you might be feeling.) Pregnancy initiates incredible hormonal changes in a woman's body.

    Has your mom been diagnosed with any "mental illness" (hate that phrase, but can't think of another)? Did this only occur when she was pregnant, or has she struggled with depression too? Are you an only child? Depression does have a genetic compnenet.

    At any rate, I'm no expert, but these are my thoughts. I would try to be present in the moment and move forward with meditation and yoga to help centre your mind. A GOOD therapist can also help you work through some of the emotional layers. Surround yourself with things that make you happy, even small things that when you see them make you smile. This helps keep you balanced too.

    Remember, sometimes there are only questions, and no clear answers.
    Last edited by PeaceBaby; 01-22-2009 at 02:05 PM. Reason: sp and added an extra thought

  7. #7
    Senior Member Anja's Avatar
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    Genetic component with depression. Also some who live with other people who are depressed tend to "catch" it from them.
    "No ray of sunshine is ever lost, but the green which it awakes into existence needs time to sprout, and it is not always granted to the sower to see the harvest. All work that is worth anything is done in faith." - Albert Schweitzer

  8. #8
    Senior Member IrishStallion819's Avatar
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    I broke out of my depression of "2.5 years", using this reasoning in why. Depression is basically feelings of resentment and i'll feelings about yourself ,others, and circumstances based on your perception of them being played overtime in your mind.. WHen you don't deal with things right away, they have a tendancy to grow and get worse. Kind of like an open wound in which you neglect; THe more you ignore it and do not give it the proper care, it just grows and fusters. Now, theirs definetly been studies that have shown its genetic.. Which, I know my dad had a major depression, about the same time i did, when he was growing up. The key is seeing if your perception of things, matches reality in regards to yourself. Sometimes we hold certain standards, in how life should go and base on what others tell us it should. We often times curse the cards we've been delt with, because we're constantly looking at others, in comparison to ourselves. Once I began to suck up my pride and started listening to other peoples advice, instead of just my own and learned to forgive people and tell people what I was feeling; I broke through my depression. I started to gain my sense of "Self-worth" back and started to feel at more use to people. Once I started to appreciate the "true Me" and stop listening to what Hollywood told me I should be; I just started to gain back the love for life all over again and realize I'm living this life on "borrowed time". My faith tells me, I'm not living my life for me but for This being and others. The less selfish I am, the better I feel about things.. The more I stick to who I am and what I believe is my purpose, the more clearity I begin to see in life.. Offcourse, diet has a huge part in it too; Not getting proper nuitrition, can affect the brain effectiveness to work. Considering, How most of the food in the grocery store now days, is just plain poison for your brain; I'm not suprise theirs an increase in depression. Also, Knowing how todays world is so "fast paced" and iMpersonable; I can also see many reasons why their are more people depressed..
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  9. #9
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    I'm sorry about what you've been through, and the story about your mom's feelings is harrowing and probably very unsettling.

    I don't think we can make direct ties between mother physiology and embryo at this time, in science, yet. We're still exploring possibilities.

    It's pretty clear that things that occur in the mother's body could impact the development of the baby, since there are numerous stages of development the child goes through and if one is disrupted, the natural process might be thwarted. We know that fluctuations in sexual hormones can impact physical development and it's possible that it affects neurology as well since the brain differentiates. And we had the whole mess with thalidomide babies, where a seemingly benign drug wreaked horrific effect on the unborn child's body.

    I have no real idea how serotonin plays into things. It's plausible, but no smoking gun trail yet as far as I know. We don't even quite understand depression yet.
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

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  10. #10
    Senior Member Anja's Avatar
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    That all sounds so healthy IS! Releasing yourself from all those angry thoughts and feelings really frees one to feel better.
    "No ray of sunshine is ever lost, but the green which it awakes into existence needs time to sprout, and it is not always granted to the sower to see the harvest. All work that is worth anything is done in faith." - Albert Schweitzer

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