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  1. #1
    Senior Member Littlelostnf's Avatar
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    Default Timing is everything?

    I was about 22/23 when I first found out my MBTI type. At that point, I had two decades and change worth of living that I could look back at and start to determine how my life up to that point fit in with what my "type" was suppose to be like. Also at that point there wasn't nearly the flood of information both supported or unsupported about personality and temperment as there is now. I didn't go back to college until I was 28 and then I truly studied psychology and particularly personality. My point is I had some time behind me when I seriously started contemplating personality....and what that meant for me.

    My question to you all is..What do you all think the age at which your type is determined has to do with your development. Is knowing what your type is suppose to be lead you one way or another?

    Thoughts...experiences.....strong opinions....thanks.
    for my life is slowed up by thought and the need to understand what I am living.

  2. #2
    Senior Member cafe's Avatar
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    I was thirty when I learned my MBTI type. I think it gave me permission to be who I was more than anything.
    “There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs.”
    ~ John Rogers

  3. #3
    Senior Member Littlelostnf's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cafe View Post
    I was thirty when I learned my MBTI type. I think it gave me permission to be who I was more than anything.
    Did it help you fine tune things or did you simply say...Ahha!
    for my life is slowed up by thought and the need to understand what I am living.

  4. #4
    Senior Member cafe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Littlelostnf View Post
    Did it help you fine tune things or did you simply say...Ahha!
    Primarily Ahha! It more helped me to see where other people were coming from. For instance, I realized that my husband wasn't intentionally foiling all my plans, he's just a P and feels differently about plans and decisions than I do.
    “There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs.”
    ~ John Rogers

  5. #5
    Reigning Bologna Princess Rajah's Avatar
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    I learned my type at 18. It still didn't help me avoid law school. In other words, knowing it still hasn't helped me avoid the pitfalls of being an INTP.

  6. #6
    Senior Member Lookin4theBestNU's Avatar
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    My question to you all is..What do you all think the age at which your type is determined has to do with your development. Is knowing what your type is suppose to be lead you one way or another?
    I took the MBTI in my early 20s. I do think it changed the way I developed. It helped me 'come to terms' with issues that probably would've taken much longer without it. I always carried with me a feeling of loneliness (though I think this is inherent to human nature not necessarily relating to type). I couldn't understand why that undercurrent was intense and ever present with me though. I know in hindsight that MBTI put together and made sense of some experiences that I had no previous explanation for. I started a search for other Intuitives. I think in some ways it increased that feeling of being alone. I realized by my late 20s that there were hardly any around me-and probably never would be. I think forums now give me an outlet to talk to other Ns and learn more about the Ss around me. I do not however try to force myself into ENFJ-like only behaviors. The MBTI is certainly not perfect and I have some 'P tendencies' that I usually enjoy! It did if anything however give me a feeling self-acceptance "typical ENFJ" or not and more tolerance of others as well. I imagine as I mature these things will gradually increase.
    "At points of clarity, I realize that my life on earth is meaningless, and that I am merely a pawn in a bigger game. A game I cannot possibly understand or have control of. Thankfully, before depression sets in, I drift back into my cloudy, bewildered daily routine." **Joel Patrick Warneke**

  7. #7
    Senior Member Littlelostnf's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lookin4theBestNU View Post
    I took the MBTI in my early 20s. I do think it changed the way I developed. It helped me 'come to terms' with issues that probably would've taken much longer without it. I always carried with me a feeling of loneliness (though I think this is inherent to human nature not necessarily relating to type). I couldn't understand why that undercurrent was intense and ever present with me though. I know in hindsight that MBTI put together and made sense of some experiences that I had no previous explanation for. I started a search for other Intuitives. I think in some ways it increased that feeling of being alone. I realized by my late 20s that there were hardly any around me-and probably never would be. I think forums now give me an outlet to talk to other Ns and learn more about the Ss around me. I do not however try to force myself into ENFJ-like only behaviors. The MBTI is certainly not perfect and I have some 'P tendencies' that I usually enjoy! It did if anything however give me a feeling self-acceptance "typical ENFJ" or not and more tolerance of others as well. I imagine as I mature these things will gradually increase.
    I have to say I agree with the increased feelings of being alone. But I was happy to be given some type of explanation as to why I felt that way. I am fortunate to have around me (and all but 3 cultivated after I learned about the MBTI) N friends. No other ENFJ's but plenty of ENFP's INFJ's and INFP's (one of my sisters included in that)

    Also coming to terms with things about myself. Definately helped me there also.
    for my life is slowed up by thought and the need to understand what I am living.

  8. #8
    Senior Member Littlelostnf's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rajah View Post
    I learned my type at 18. It still didn't help me avoid law school. In other words, knowing it still hasn't helped me avoid the pitfalls of being an INTP.
    Do you enjoy law school?
    for my life is slowed up by thought and the need to understand what I am living.

  9. #9
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    I first "discovered" MBTI when I was in my mid-20's.

    For me, it was an "A-Ha!" moment. Everything I had sort of figured out already, the patterns I had been trying to discern in the many people I had experienced in my life, suddenly fell into place. I sometimes wish I had discovered it earlier, since I had always possessed a great deal of self-doubt/mistrust, and it would have helped alleviate my sense of being an outsider to humanity. This would have been extremely beneficial during my adolescence, because I literally was alone in terms of "figuring out life" and had no wise adult to help me get a hold of things.

    My conflicts and differences were no longer necessarily because something was "wrong" with me or because I was an "alien" and unworthy to be part of the community -- I was actually just what i was supposed to be, along with everyone else in life.

    Like cafe said, it also freed me up to accept other people. They were not particularly trying to stymie or reject/hurt me, they were just being who they were. Understanding the foundational "life orientation" of different types of people helped me see things much more clearly and derive people's intentions/motivations more clearly, and even be more accepting of them *and* more helpful because I was seeing who they could be rather than expecting their "ideal self' to resemble *me*. Forgiveness came more easily.

    I think MBTI is useful in terms of taking what you already know about yourself to the next level. It offers the typical patterns of people who focus on certain functions, thus helping you see what a more efficient and idealized self might look like... giving you something to shoot for.
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

  10. #10
    Senior Member Littlelostnf's Avatar
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    I first "discovered" MBTI when I was in my mid-20's.

    For me, it was an "A-Ha!" moment. Everything I had sort of figured out already, the patterns I had been trying to discern in the many people I had experienced in my life, suddenly fell into place. I sometimes wish I had discovered it earlier, since I had always possessed a great deal of self-doubt/mistrust, and it would have helped alleviate my sense of being an outsider to humanity. This would have been extremely beneficial during my adolescence, because I literally was alone in terms of "figuring out life" and had no wise adult to help me get a hold of things.
    Fortunato mentions that knowing about MBTI earlier would have helped him during his adolescence. Anyone here feel differently? I'm wondering if those younger forum members can be or have been overly influenced by knowing their type. I'm just fleshing this out in my head so this is all just a process but...I'm wondering if it would simply be better to have parents know a childs type and be able to work with their adolescent with understanding then to have an adolescent know their type. Could it be that knowing could be detrimental to some extent...JUST ASKING.
    for my life is slowed up by thought and the need to understand what I am living.

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