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  1. #81
    violaine
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    I have never been envious. I am always happy for someone when they have something good happening in their life.

    I have only ever been jealous when I have good reason. i.e. When the person I am with is too flirtatious or has cheated on me. In that situation I find it very difficult to keep a lid on feeling jealous. I feel miserable when I'm like that, it takes a lot out of me. It doesn't inspire passion in me either if someone tries to make me jealous, it slowly kills my feelings for them.

  2. #82
    filling some space UnitOfPopulation's Avatar
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    I'm rarely envious or jealous, but having been in a bad situation with my job, I got envious of a young woman (perhaps 17), a salesperson in a shop.

    Her job seemed easy to do, stress free, not a worry with her life. Perhaps some, but insignificant. I just thought, no skills needed, just a fun attitude, and there you go. Felt depressed afterwards.

    I'm envious of my successful ex boss too, who got his business started at a young age due to help from his rich father.

    Jealousy, I'll give that a thought.

    No, none of that in years. Say, 20.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  3. #83
    & Badger, Ratty and Toad Mole's Avatar
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    They told us, "Make love not war".

    They told us love was free and we should make free love.

    But the serpent in the garden is jealousy.

  4. #84
    filling some space UnitOfPopulation's Avatar
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    Seeing I've answered this last year and remembered a moment of jealousy, I must be generally quick to forget
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  5. #85
    heart on fire
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    Quote Originally Posted by Victor View Post
    They told us, "Make love not war".

    They told us love was free and we should make free love.

    But the serpent in the garden is jealousy.
    That and herpes.

  6. #86
    Senior Member Oso Mocoso's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by heart View Post
    That and herpes.
    Thank you, heart, for going there.

  7. #87
    4x9 cascadeco's Avatar
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    I can certainly be jealous. I don't typically verbalize it or show it; usually just a passing feeling.

    Much of it is related to insecurities I have in myself - mostly physical - so I can be quite jealous at times of those who have characteristics that I find quite lacking in myself.

    And like most, I can be jealous in romantic settings.
    "...On and on and on and on he strode, far out over the sands, singing wildly to the sea, crying to greet the advent of the life that had cried to him." - James Joyce

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  8. #88
    `~~Philosoflying~~` SillySapienne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cascademn View Post
    I can certainly be jealous. I don't typically verbalize it or show it; usually just a passing feeling.

    Much of it is related to insecurities I have in myself - mostly physical - so I can be quite jealous at times of those who have characteristics that I find quite lacking in myself.
    Question: So do you find yourself feeling fleeting feelings of jealousy whenever some woman you deem to be highly, physically attractive, or more attractive than yourself crosses your optical path?

    I am more than quite sure this is normal, but I still have trouble understanding it, so if you would, could you explain this a bit more in detail?

    I, for example, would say, that regarding my physical appearance, I am quite cognizant of my nicer features as well as my more "problem areas", though I do think, that, overall, I am quite physically attractive, and I rarely, if ever, mentally dwell on my problem areas. Thank god!

    Note: My sister once gave me the best piece of advice, that being, never dwell too long in front of a mirror, you'll just end up picking yourself apart.

    Also, I never, ever, EVER, weigh myself. I have no idea how much I weigh, nor do I care, just as long as I feel good about myself and still fit into my clothes, I've accepted that being a woman means that my weight is going to fluctuate a bit sometimes, oh well. I don't think I need a scale to tell me definitively that I've gained a pound or two, when I probably know I have and, that, as mentioned before, this kind of fluctuation is normal.

    But, I do know this much, my family members, as well as all of my close friends have each told me at some point in our relationships that I am an anomaly/freak when it comes to jealousy, in that compared to most folks, I do not experience jealousy much, if at all, and they are right. Excluding romantic jealousy, I pretty much never, ever experience jealousy.

    I see physically beautiful women on a daily basis, women/girls who are objectively ten times prettier than I, and I just look at them with a sense of aesthetic appreciation, like I would to a beautiful wild-grown lupine.

    They're just real purrdy, you know?
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  9. #89
    Senior Member norepinephrine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CaptainChick View Post
    Excluding romantic jealousy, I pretty much never, ever experience jealousy.

    I see physically beautiful women on a daily basis, women/girls who are objectively ten times prettier than I, and I just look at them with a sense of aesthetic appreciation, like I would to a beautiful wild-grown lupine.

    They're just real purrdy, you know?
    Yes, I do know. Working on a campus, I would have to be insane if I allowed the physical beauty of co-eds phase me. And I enjoy mentally commenting on whatever feature draws my attention.

    The only ones I don't care for (and they are few) are those who look as though they are parading their looks for attention. Though even they may have reasons for doing so of which I am unaware.

    So long as I can draw a longer than casual glance from a male I pass on the sidewalk, I am perfectly content.

    After that passes, well... I still have my wits.

    When those are gone - well, I doubt I'll much care either way.

  10. #90
    Senior Member Erudur's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by pockets View Post
    More insidiously, I have a very intense feeling of guilt whenever I've been joking around with a male friend or something, and move away, and then realise this INTJ I have a thing with was near. I don't know if it's because I'm hyper-vigilant about inciting jealousy, or that I sub-consciously try to induce jealousy, and then feel guilty about my motives. I don't know if joking around with someone else normally causes jealousy but I don't seem to have that relaxed mutual entertaining thing going on with the INTJ (with us it's more like mutual snarky comments), so yeah.
    This was a really interesting thread. I'm glad it resurfaced. I am intrigued by this potential Fi correlation to a lower propensity for jealousy. I think I'm a higher Fi developed INTJ, and I don't think I experience jealousy much. When someone else seems to have the affections of somebody I'm attracted to, I think it creates in me more of an ache of longing than jealousy. Like erinavery said (though she seemed to be referencing stuff/attributes rather than romantic feelings), I don't really feel like I have any more right to someone's affections than the other person. I also don't let those feelings diminish my own feeling of self-worth.

    "I have a thing with" -- Sounds very undefined! I don't want to project, but if your INTJ is like me, he probably notices, but doesn't want to be jealous, so he doesn't respond with jealousy.

    Another interesting example of NFP and NTJ compatibility.

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