Jealousy and Envy

[SillySapienne]

To be honest, I do associate jealousy and envy as more of a J thing than that of a P thing.

This might be due to the fact that most/all Ps I know are not the jealous-type, that being said, jealousy and envy are ingrained human emotions/qualities, but I think some of us are more inclined than others to get/feel jealous or envious.

Quick hippie note: It is really nice to truly appreciate who you are, and what you have.

Appreciation, aka, jealousy and envy's kryptonite

 

[Rangler]

To be honest, I do associate jealousy and envy as more of a J thing than that of a P thing.

This might be due to the fact that most/all Ps I know are not the jealous-type, that being said, jealousy and envy are ingrained human emotions/qualities, but I think some of us are more inclined than other to get/feel jealous or envious.

Quick hippie note: It is really nice to truly appreciate who you are, and what you have.

Appreciation, aka, jealousy and envy's kryptonite

I totally agree with that. It's not sooo hippy. Haha.

It could well be a J thing. I certainly know that if my ego were really let loose, I would primarily be motivated by jealousy and envy. Being goal-oriented and driven can be put to negative uses.

I find that for me, the simple act of giving corrects my focus.

 

[digesthisickness]

hmm, i don't know how right you are, CC, but i thought i'd add my two cents as far as being a P and jealousy/envy.

i'm so not either one that it actually pisses people off sometimes.

like there's something wrong with me because of it.

 

[Erudur]

On the P/J thing, I haven't really examined this subject in my own world of observation. But I'm not much given to jealousy or envy, nor to I sense it much from a couple other INTJ friends.

I have a pretty wounded INFP brother who seems to struggle with it -- usually in comparison to the success of others.

I am very much not a zero sum thinking person. It seems clear to me that success is contagious -- bringing others out of poverty (monetary, self-image, friendships) will reap even more of the same.

I ran across this anecdote that relates...I liked it:

"...When I was shopping this past Christmas season and went into a store that turned out not to have what I was looking for, I asked them if they knew where I might get the item. Their reply was a lame “no.” I knew they just did not want to send me to a competitor. I went to the competitor, and they turned out not to have it either. However, not only did they make some recommendations, but they phoned their competitors for me. Next time, I will certainly go to that store first. By thinking of their customer and even their competitor, they won my trust and probably my future business. It is always right to do the right thing. Jealousy will always hurt the one who has it the most."

 

[Voxx]

Nope, one can feel jealous without feeling envious.



JEALOUSY definition | Dictionary.com

ENVY definition | Dictionary.com

Tell me what the difference between the two is.

This is taken from the second link (scroll down to see it):

Synonyms:
1. enviousness. Envy and jealousy are very close in meaning. Envy denotes a longing to possess something awarded to or achieved by another: to feel envy when a friend inherits a fortune. Jealousy, on the other hand, denotes a feeling of resentment that another has gained something that one more rightfully deserves: to feel jealousy when a coworker receives a promotion.

As you can see the definition for the term 'jealousy' in this case is very awkward: "Jealousy...denotes a feeling of resentment that another has gained something that one more rightfully deserves..." Basically, in this context it seems as if the definition basically translates into: "jealousy occurs when you feel resentment towards another person who has gained what they rightfully deserve", but it can also translate into:
"jealousy occurs when you feel resentment towards another person who has acquired something that you think that you personally deserve more than they do because you rightfully earned it and they didn’t (or because you think that you are generally better than they are).”

Catch my drift?

In that case, jealousy occurs when someone else gets something that you think that you deserve more than they do because you think that you are either the superior or you earned what they have and they didn’t (i. e. a promotion). Envy on the other hand, (and this is based entirely on my interpretation) occurs when you want something that someone else has but you do not think that you deserve it any more than they do (i. e. eye color).

Hypothetical situation: someone you are romantically interested in falls for someone less attractive and intelligent than you; this makes you jealous. Likewise, someone you are romantically interested in falls for someone better looking and more intelligent than you; you feel envious

 

[cascadeco]

In that case, jealousy occurs when someone else gets something that you think that you deserve more than they do because you think that you are either the superior or you earned what they have and they didn’t (i. e. a promotion). Envy on the other hand, (and this is based entirely on my interpretation) occurs when you want something that someone else has but you do not think that you deserve it any more than they do (i. e. eye color).

Interesting.

I guess I tend to use the words interchangeably, and don't concern myself much with which one is appropriate. ha!

Given these definitions, it's envy I tend to experience. Jealousy, not so much.

 

[spirilis]

Interesting.

I guess I tend to use the words interchangeably, and don't concern myself much with which one is appropriate. ha!

Given these definitions, it's envy I tend to experience. Jealousy, not so much.

same here. Jealousy is a bit tasteless to me so I get over it pretty fast, but envy I experience, although usually hide.

 

[kiddykat]

I think some of us are more inclined than others to get/feel jealous or envious.

I think lack of jealousy relates to having a strong sense of insight & contentness within ourselves? If we feel happy from within, the more likely, we engage in pro-social behavior.

The more authentic we are, the more we seek to maintain a sense of inner calm. By being true to ourselves, we see the greys/similarities in our common experiences so that life's easier to breath.. Hence, we approach life in a more jovial sense?

There are also those who are more nonchalant about things; they feel as though they have nothing for others to be jealous about. I admire people for who they are, not what they are. When they're truly happy, then I'm happy.. I enjoy the topic. Always questioned the same, even as a kid.. When others hurt, I hurt. Something, I can't help but to analyze/intuit, non-verbally, even as an adult!

 

[Lasting_Pain]

I honestly am not jealous or envy of no one because that promotes weakness, but I do respect people who have qualities or traits that I do not possess.

 

[tibby]

I used to be jealous to my sister 'cause I had to use her old (broken and ugly) stuff.

 

[Morpeko]

I'm jealous and envious of everyone. It seems like everyone got dealt a better hand than I have. Even the people with objectively worse lives, I can't help but look at them and wish I were them in some way. It's never in a material way, but people seem to always have more than I do socially, emotionally, and mentally.

I'm often envious of things that I don't even want, just because I can't have them. I don't want to be in a relationship, but I look at others who happily (or even unhappily) have them with bitterness and disgust.

 

[RadicalDoubt]

Jealousy and envy are somewhat new emotions to me and seem to be aroused by my own personal insecurities or begin exist as a replacement emotion for attraction. I tend to get very envious of those who are able to perform life better than myself (ie. have a natural ability to do all the "normal" human things without in depth thought or an energy drain such as being able to communicate with others, being able to have relationships with others, etc). I also get very envious when others are able to succeed and maintain skillsets and hobbies that I once had but had to drop due to my anxiety. Most of this tends to result in heavy rumination, as I typically don't act on my envious tendencies externally. There is some more mild envy when it comes to academia of course, but that's not as impactful for me normally.