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  1. #1
    Certified Sausage Smoker Elfboy's Avatar
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    Default Core Beliefs of 4s According to Beatrice Chestnut

    - "I am lacking some essential qualities of goodness, and so I will inevitably be rejected and abandoned by others."
    - "Since I lost the love of someone I loved and needed in the past it must mean there's something fundamentally wrong with me."
    - "Others have what I want, but I can't get it because there's something wrong with me."
    - "What I want eludes me, and what I can have seems somehow boring or lacking something essential. What is here and how is mundane and boring; what I desire most is ideal and at a distance."
    - "If someone does love me or want to be with me, there must be something wrong with them."
    - "My intensity makes me special."
    - "What I want most is love, but I won't be able to what I want because (experience has proven) I am not lovable."
    - "I lack some basic attributes that wold allow others to really love me. But if I could find the ideal person who realizes how special I am, then maybe I could really experience what I long for."
    - "I'm special, but others don't recognize it."
    - "No one understands me. I am destined to be misunderstood."
    - "I will never be able to fit in because I'm unique (or special or deficient). I feel as if I don't belong.
    - "I expect that eventually, most people will abandon me."
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  2. #2
    Level 8 Propaganda Bot SpankyMcFly's Avatar
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    I want to say ego came first and the enneagram type developed as a consequence of the ego in order to feed it...
    "The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents... Some day the piecing together of dissociated knowledge will open up such terrifying vistas of reality, and of our frightful position therein, that we shall either go mad from the revelation or flee from the light into the peace and safety of a new Dark Age. " - H.P. Lovecraft
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  3. #3

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    hmmmmm

  4. #4
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  5. #5
    Sugar Hiccup OrangeAppled's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elfboy View Post
    - "I am lacking some essential qualities of goodness, and so I will inevitably be rejected and abandoned by others."
    - "Since I lost the love of someone I loved and needed in the past it must mean there's something fundamentally wrong with me."
    - "Others have what I want, but I can't get it because there's something wrong with me."
    - "What I want eludes me, and what I can have seems somehow boring or lacking something essential. What is here and how is mundane and boring; what I desire most is ideal and at a distance."
    - "If someone does love me or want to be with me, there must be something wrong with them."
    - "My intensity makes me special."
    - "What I want most is love, but I won't be able to what I want because (experience has proven) I am not lovable."
    - "I lack some basic attributes that wold allow others to really love me. But if I could find the ideal person who realizes how special I am, then maybe I could really experience what I long for."
    - "I'm special, but others don't recognize it."
    - "No one understands me. I am destined to be misunderstood."
    - "I will never be able to fit in because I'm unique (or special
    or deficient). I feel as if I don't belong.
    - "I expect that eventually, most people will abandon me."
    Yeah most of this works for me.
    The bolded is off.... I don't think I'm special and that others don't recognize it. Actually, I can feel frustrated that others will fail to relate to me. I naively continue to think that people will "get" it and when they don't, I am disheartened. I never expect misunderstanding, no matter how much it occurs.
    I don't feel I can fit in, true, but it's not because I think I am special. Sometimes I think I'm deficient - well, often. But my perspective is also that others are willing to repress themselves to fit some mold, and perhaps they are happy that way. But I cannot stomach that or be happy that way. Others are special too, but they'll betray themselves for security. I suppose I may feel some deficiency like selfishness or stubbornness or inability to be content the way others are, and this is what keeps me from conforming as needed to fit in.

    I don't think most people will abandon me, but I do think I wont ever be important enough for most of them to remember me or to make me a priority or to highly value me as a friend. I don't expect betrayal or deliberate abandonment, it's more like being forgotten.
    Often a star was waiting for you to notice it. A wave rolled toward you out of the distant past, or as you walked under an open window, a violin yielded itself to your hearing. All this was mission. But could you accomplish it? (Rilke)

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    Likes chickpea, thoughtlost, xXMariahXx liked this post

  6. #6

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    What I want most is not love, at least I've never felt this way and that's why I can't relate to these core beliefs... maybe I am not a 4 after all

  7. #7
    Senior Member senza tema's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by OrangeAppled View Post

    I don't think most people will abandon me, but I do think I wont ever be important enough for most of them to remember me or to make me a priority or to highly value me as a friend. I don't expect betrayal or deliberate abandonment, it's more like being forgotten.
    Yes, yes, yes. This, so much.

  8. #8
    Honeyed Water thoughtlost's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by OrangeAppled View Post
    Yeah most of this works for me.
    The bolded is off.... I don't think I'm special and that others don't recognize it. Actually, I can feel frustrated that others will fail to relate to me. I naively continue to think that people will "get" it and when they don't, I am disheartened. I never expect misunderstanding, no matter how much it occurs.
    I don't feel I can fit in, true, but it's not because I think I am special. Sometimes I think I'm deficient - well, often. But my perspective is also that others are willing to repress themselves to fit some mold, and perhaps they are happy that way. But I cannot stomach that or be happy that way. Others are special too, but they'll betray themselves for security. I suppose I may feel some deficiency like selfishness or stubbornness or inability to be content the way others are, and this is what keeps me from conforming as needed to fit in.

    I don't think most people will abandon me, but I do think I wont ever be important enough for most of them to remember me or to make me a priority or to highly value me as a friend. I don't expect betrayal or deliberate abandonment, it's more like being forgotten.
    I am not even a 4, yet I relate this 1000000000% lol xDDD
    You are so arbitrary.

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