pinkgraffiti
New member
- Joined
- Mar 20, 2011
- Messages
- 1,482
- MBTI Type
- ENFP
- Enneagram
- 748
- Instinctual Variant
- sx/so
Hi :hi:
I need help from you! I'm about to quit my job, because I have a really hard time with relating to my ENFJ 8w7 boss. I've looked around the interwebz for more info on 8w7's, but not a long is available.
Im talking about an unhealthy 8w7. I believe my boss is bipolar. She is very sweet and personal - always way more personal than any boss i've ever had (integration to 2?) - but may lash out at any moment, it's like she fundamentally is afraid of being betrayed (emotionally), so always needs confirmation that people are not trying to double cross her.
She's 45, her work is not going very well, and I'm her immediate inferior, so she takes it out on me. It's like having a mirror: she will accuse me of having all her flaws (which isn't correct). In a way, I understand her personality, and I feel empathy, because I think it's similar to mine: she doesn't like schedules and conformity, is very curious and intelligent, is always moving and interested in virtually everything. I even thought she was a 7w8, like me.
....Up to the moment she told me she has severe anger problems. And this is our big difference and the thing I cannot control: we argue often, but I participate in them because my ultimate goal is to have emotional stability and to not fight again. But her, it seems she actually likes fighting! So when we make up, I am happy that things will now change, but after a while she'll start fighting about something else!
I am incredibly exhausted of all the emotional weight she's putting on me. I don't know what to do: I've tried avoidance, I've tried confrontation, I've tried to be less personal, but it's impossible, because she goes through cycles of breaking your relationship and then trying to build it up again.
Help? Any 8w7's around?
I need help from you! I'm about to quit my job, because I have a really hard time with relating to my ENFJ 8w7 boss. I've looked around the interwebz for more info on 8w7's, but not a long is available.
Im talking about an unhealthy 8w7. I believe my boss is bipolar. She is very sweet and personal - always way more personal than any boss i've ever had (integration to 2?) - but may lash out at any moment, it's like she fundamentally is afraid of being betrayed (emotionally), so always needs confirmation that people are not trying to double cross her.
She's 45, her work is not going very well, and I'm her immediate inferior, so she takes it out on me. It's like having a mirror: she will accuse me of having all her flaws (which isn't correct). In a way, I understand her personality, and I feel empathy, because I think it's similar to mine: she doesn't like schedules and conformity, is very curious and intelligent, is always moving and interested in virtually everything. I even thought she was a 7w8, like me.
....Up to the moment she told me she has severe anger problems. And this is our big difference and the thing I cannot control: we argue often, but I participate in them because my ultimate goal is to have emotional stability and to not fight again. But her, it seems she actually likes fighting! So when we make up, I am happy that things will now change, but after a while she'll start fighting about something else!
I am incredibly exhausted of all the emotional weight she's putting on me. I don't know what to do: I've tried avoidance, I've tried confrontation, I've tried to be less personal, but it's impossible, because she goes through cycles of breaking your relationship and then trying to build it up again.
Help? Any 8w7's around?
