Originally Posted by Hard
Originally Posted by EJCC
I should have expounded on the basis of the question; Riso and Hudson’s enneagram podcast (the enneagram one description is approximately 5 minutes) stated this regarding the childhood of an E1:
As children, ones were good boys and good girls who learned to discipline and restrain themselves and postpone rewards until their work was done. They often disliked or distrusted authority figures who they usually saw as unjust or arbitrary or indifferent. As a result, young ones decided to take the issue of reward and punishment onto themselves. Their own consciences would be their guide, they were praised and rewarded for being adult and rational at an early age and may not have had a very happy or carefree childhood.
Which is interesting as I would say it somewhat corresponds to your childhoods.
I was curious if our perceptions of each other (E1, E9) were what I assumed (which it is). I’ve always respected ones for their self-discipline, rational decision-making and grounded nature. But, you’re right, ones do play the bad cop to the nines' good cop. I’ve seen ones make imperative decisions despite how undesirability to the populace, repeatedly, and stand by them. It’s a quality I’ve admired and desired but never tried to develop since I lack the tenacity and certitude. The irony is what I admire about ones is also what I dislike about them; I tend to keep E1s at a distance (IRL) because I’m usually in the average levels of the enneagram and we clash often due to their obstinacy and my passivity and detachment.
E9's are known for not wanting or having solid opinions; I have an opinion on pretty much everything and go out of my way to find one. They like keeping things open and free; I need things nailed down and locked in.
It's that difference that can create a problem. I suspect a lot of 9's would be put off by me. Some for "intensity" (though I don't consider myself that intense of a person, just a strong presence), but mostly for doing they kinds of things they don't want... The thing that drives me nuts the most is their sheer ambivalence to almost everything... In general 9's will either irritate me, bore me to death, and in rare cases anger me if their fence sitting infringes upon me by forcing inaction.
When I was an admin on the INFJforums one of my fellow admins was a 9w1... It was impossible
for anyone to get mad at her or hate her. Can't say the same for myself.
Accurate. You know us well, there's really no type more stubborn than a disgruntled, dispassionate nine.
but then again, if a 9 is in a place where I'd need to give them advice, they'd probably ignore it.