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  1. #1
    Senior Member Abbey's Avatar
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    Default 8s: Please Don't Have Children

    My father is an 8 and I know there is a lot of things that make up a person and I do love him, but he is not a very good father. Aside from not understanding me at all, (he's an ENTJ, I'm an INFP) he is very controlling.

    Obviously, do whatever you want, have children if you please, but I just hope that if one potential or current parent reads this and decides to not try to control their child and/or spouse, I have done their family some good.

    Further, as eights, what do you desire to control? Being a four and having many four friends, we all have our purpose, so I thought maybe eights all have their thing they desire to control.

  2. #2
    Senior Member AzulEyes's Avatar
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    My ENTJ 8 friend is an awesome Dad. Grant it- his kids are little. But I see him always being a great dad. Probably depends on the individual. Wanting to control some things in life doesn't always equate to wanting to control your kids- though in your case apparently it did. (Sorry for that.)
    It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are. ~e.e. cummings

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    Likes Aurora James liked this post

  3. #3
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    i think my ex (type 8) bf will be an awesome dad.

    i'm sorry you've had that experience tho...can't stand being controlled like that either but really just about all etypes will screw their children up in some way or another. we all have our stuffs ya know?
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  4. #4
    Senior Member Sanjuro's Avatar
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    LOL, wow.

    I could post a very similar post about 9s, though. I'm sure my mom could post about 1s. I think it's more about individual parents, and the short-comings of all types.

    Or maybe only gut types. (LOL, I jest. I wouldn't want me for a parent, either, and I'm a 4).

  5. #5
    ndovjtjcaqidthi
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    Any type can be unhealthy.

  6. #6
    Senior Member PimpinMcBoltage's Avatar
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    8s will be having children whether you want it or not. If they want it or not.
    Phelgmatic-Jewish-Communist-Islamic-Transethnic-Asexual-National Socialist

  7. #7
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    You don't raise 8 children. We raise you... TO THE GROUND

  8. #8
    Senior Member cafe's Avatar
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    I bet they put on better birthday parties than I do. God, I hated doing birthday parties. Now I can use my 9w1 passive-aggressive superpowers and tell them they can have a party if they clean the house and they are usually too lazy to clean the house, so I don't have to do a party.
    “There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs.”
    ~ John Rogers

  9. #9
    nee andante bechimo's Avatar
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    Here's what my ENTP son said to me recently, paraphrased:

    Mom, all my life you've never really forced me to do anything but I have to thank you for forcing me to learn how to swim.

    *cues hugs and tears all around*

    The only reason why he was forced to do this, was because it was a safety issue.

    Not all 8s are controlling parents. But it really helps to have a son who's mature and responsible enough to make good, solid decisions on his own. Had he been otherwise, it's possible I might have been more controlling but as soon as he was capable, he was given simple choices so he never felt that he didn't have sufficient control in his life. It also helped to hone his ability to make responsible decisions since explanations were given for choices.

    Parenting is a synergy and guidance, not a wardship. If you consider ENTJs, we have no interest in micromanaging anyone, even our own children. Here are the tools, here's the end-goal, GO!

  10. #10
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    I can't see myself being controlling. I can see myself being neglectful, however.

    I'm kind of thinking about kicking my kid out of the house at an early age and teaching him to not take things for granted.

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