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  1. #1

    Default Happiness for Enneagram Type 4 video!

    I just watched this video and it was amazing! He really described a type 4 in such a great way and I can totally relate to everything he's saying.

  2. #2
    Sugar Hiccup OrangeAppled's Avatar
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    Some interesting points.

    I admit I had a hard time getting through it because it emotional demonstrations were too cheesy & cliche. It made me cringe and I couldn't identify with that level of, er, shallow.
    Often a star was waiting for you to notice it. A wave rolled toward you out of the distant past, or as you walked under an open window, a violin yielded itself to your hearing. All this was mission. But could you accomplish it? (Rilke)

    INFP | 4w5 sp/sx | RLUEI - Primary Inquisitive | Tritype is tripe

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    Senior Member Tiltyred's Avatar
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    So, 4s are all bipolar?

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    It was alright.

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    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    I recognise it, but it's not complete. It just outlines my worst moments ,and those don't feel right - I KNOW that I'm deceiving myself when I get that way. His solution does work, but its incredibly hard to do when you're already down and wallowing in self-pity. You need someone to help you out and believe in you or you need to find the energy to get angry at being in that situation in the first place. It's one of the reasons I have a knee-jerk reaction to always try and see a situation for the potential and opportunities it offers, even when it sucks, coz I know it'll just drag me down and it's not going to help me one bit.

    And yes, his acting is a bit off at times
    ★ڿڰۣ✿ℒoѵℯ✿ڿڰۣ★





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  6. #6
    brainheart
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    Seems like an extrovert or an extroverted feeler. Overall, I'm going to say it's cool, but his way of dealing was different than mine. What helps me is to either a. detach and observe my feelings and in that detachment recognize that they are passing, that this has happened before and I will get through it again or b. go as deeply into my feelings as possible but express them through art. I think the second option works the best. It's tremendously cathartic and then I also have something to show for my pain.

    I don't think feelings are so either/or: happy vs sad, for example. When at my best I'm feeling the scope and complexity of all feelings, and they are often mixed. I feel like I could explode with all that feel, but in a good way. This is when I love my life the most, when I am honoring feelings for what they are, truly and completely. I also feel like this is my strength, what I can give to others- helping them to recognize the importance of the full range of feeling (not just good or happy), and how this is what makes us human.

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    Sugar Hiccup OrangeAppled's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by brainheart View Post
    Seems like an extrovert or an extroverted feeler. Overall, I'm going to say it's cool, but his way of dealing was different than mine. What helps me is to either a. detach and observe my feelings and in that detachment recognize that they are passing, that this has happened before and I will get through it again or b. go as deeply into my feelings as possible but express them through art. I think the second option works the best. It's tremendously cathartic and then I also have something to show for my pain.

    I don't think feelings are so either/or: happy vs sad, for example. When at my best I'm feeling the scope and complexity of all feelings, and they are often mixed. I feel like I could explode with all that feel, but in a good way. This is when I love my life the most, when I am honoring feelings for what they are, truly and completely. I also feel like this is my strength, what I can give to others- helping them to recognize the importance of the full range of feeling (not just good or happy), and how this is what makes us human.
    YES. Nuance of emotion is in such fine shades that there is no clear line between good & bad emotional feelings. I seem to experience more in terms of intensity, which is why "calm" (internally, I mean) can be something I don't particularly aim for, as it can register as bland or dead to me. I don't want to be upset or thrilled all the time either, but some kind of magical merging with reality, where I'm no longer alienated or disconnected. I agree that artistic/creative outlets are often the closest I can purposely create this for myself.

    The video does touch on how 4s aren't seeking internal peace, but intense feeling, and I suppose it just uses very black & white examples to illustrate that point.
    Often a star was waiting for you to notice it. A wave rolled toward you out of the distant past, or as you walked under an open window, a violin yielded itself to your hearing. All this was mission. But could you accomplish it? (Rilke)

    INFP | 4w5 sp/sx | RLUEI - Primary Inquisitive | Tritype is tripe

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    Senior Member pinkgraffiti's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by OrangeAppled View Post
    Some interesting points.

    I admit I had a hard time getting through it because it emotional demonstrations were too cheesy & cliche. It made me cringe and I couldn't identify with that level of, er, shallow.
    i showed it to my type4 girlfriend, she thought the same as you. but it is to be noted that he's a type 4, so no way he's talking without personal experience.

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    Senior Member IndyGhost's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tiltyred View Post
    So, 4s are all bipolar?
    ...probably.


    I'm having a hard time focusing on this guy and the video. Will anyone just sum it up for me?
    "I don't know a perfect person.
    I only know flawed people who are still worth loving."
    -John Green

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    Senior Member Sanjuro's Avatar
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    Lots of thoughts.

    - I thought his take was interesting, and that it comes from a co-4 reassures me.

    - I wish he would have included a word on feeling rejected, like an outsider, and unable to be a "normal" human; feeling revolting and disgusting and all, but I suspect this guy was a 4w3 so the issues may not apply there. Still, this is the crux of the issue for me.

    - I strongly identify with the "mission in life" phenomenon he describes more than I've identified with any other description of it--though I'd note that it doesn't have to be an artistic mission. I am very skillful with arts and aesthetics, but my own sense of destiny has revolved far more around exploring the world and its mysteries, traveling, building something great, and witnessing great (but unspecified) events in world history (for which the world news serves excellently).

    - I remember the "original connection", though it's only as an adult that I became fully aware of this as an issue. I'm glad he brought that in, though, and connected it that way.

    - I would have skipped the whole sobbing in the corner about how much my life sucks, though--no matter how bleak my despair, I've seldom been reduced to tears about my shitty life. Yes, I've pondered whether my useless life has been worth continuing, but that's been more of a general brooding than anything else. Moreover, it usually has to do with me being bored than actually having a shitty life. I kind of resent how his acting enforces the whole "all 4s are crybabies" thing, but that might just be me.

    - What bothered me more than the acting, though, is the question of Why is the backdrop a Palestinian headscarf? It seems an odd choice.

    OK, well I'm making this sound more critical than intended--I actually liked the video a lot, and it touched on the envy and longing in ways that most descriptions have not done for me. I give the OP thumbs up!

    As a side note, I wonder if he is 7-fixed? He's making it sound like 4s should integrate to 7 rather than 1, and I am wondering if a 7-fix is why he finds that "gratefulness" work is beneficial? I can understand why other 4s might resent being told this--it's like, Sure, just change the subject here.

    I have found, however, that it does help to use another fix--I've been at my best and most grateful undertaking entrepreneurial efforts, out struggling against the Real World, fighting for survival, and getting involved with community politics. These are the things that really have built self-esteem, and I don't think it's a coincidence that I have 8- and 6-fixes.

    EDIT: While on this subject, I might as well add that I have found it beneficial to develop qualities of my other wing as well.

    Just my thoughts.

    PS--yes, I've been told I'm bipolar by my family. I disagree--this is just my emotional flow, and I've never seen the problem with it.

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