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  1. #21
    Senior Member Sanjuro's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Showbread View Post
    My 4 friend dislikes being a 4. She says it feels like a "useless type." Which, we try to assure her it is not.
    Can you elaborate on how you assure her of this??

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  2. #22
    climb on Showbread's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sanjuro View Post
    Can you elaborate on how you assure her of this??
    We just tell her that all the types are equal, and we need all types of people. Which, I suppose sounds pretty lame. She just doesn't have a whole lot of self-confidence to begin with. Any suggestions??
    Friends, waffles, work

    "The problem is, when you depend on a substitute for love, you can never get enough" - Louis Cozolino

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  3. #23
    Senior Member Sanjuro's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Showbread View Post
    We just tell her that all the types are equal, and we need all types of people. Which, I suppose sounds pretty lame. She just doesn't have a whole lot of self-confidence to begin with. Any suggestions??
    Yeah, that doesn't help someone who's convinced that they are irrelevant to the world and who undervalues their inherent qualities anyway.

    I don't really have any useful suggestions at the time, actually. That's why I asked you! To me, the type doesn't seem terribly good at being involved with others except in a highly tortured manner, and whose strengths revolve around being really ingrown. I gather that the most we can do to overcome that is paint really pretty pictures or something. (I am only speaking from personal experience. This may not apply to all 4s).

    I mean rationally speaking, it's obvious that everyone has value. Sure, we need all types of people, but philosophically speaking, how does that translate? How do 4s best use their innate qualities to benefit the world? I'll let you know when I come to my final conclusions!

    EDIT: Not to be overly down on 4s. I'm just raising the point.

  4. #24
    Honeyed Water thoughtlost's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Showbread View Post
    We just tell her that all the types are equal, and we need all types of people. Which, I suppose sounds pretty lame. She just doesn't have a whole lot of self-confidence to begin with. Any suggestions??
    Although I am not a four, I feel that I can offer not so usefull input since I can relate to your friend: No matter what you tell her, unless she truly sees the value in herself, no amount or kind of external input will make her feel like she is "worthy" human being. ...I bet that even if she gets all As on every exam, volunteers at a church or is even a pleasant person (in other people's eyes) it will still be very hard for her to see the value in her being.

    It kind of sounds counter-intuitive, but I found it helpful to be left alone when I was at my worst. People providing input and trying to make me feel better will only make it worse. As you already know, it's an intrapersonal ordeal ...so I don't know if there's really anything anyone can really do... Just be understanding (and emotionally distant) about what's going on.

    this is just my experience.

  5. #25
    Blind Guardian Haven's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by thoughtlost View Post
    Although I am not a four, I feel that I can offer not so usefull input since I can relate to your friend: No matter what you tell her, unless she truly sees the value in herself, no amount or kind of external input will make her feel like she is "worthy" human being. ...I bet that even if she gets all As on every exam, volunteers at a church or is even a pleasant person (in other people's eyes) it will still be very hard for her to see the value in her being.

    It kind of sounds counter-intuitive, but I found it helpful to be left alone when I was at my worst. People providing input and trying to make me feel better will only make it worse. As you already know, it's an intrapersonal ordeal ...so I don't know if there's really anything anyone can really do... Just be understanding (and emotionally distant) about what's going on.

    this is just my experience.
    Found another 2!
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  6. #26
    Honeyed Water thoughtlost's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Haven View Post
    Found another 2!
    lol, can I ask why? I've typed myself as a 6w7...

  7. #27
    Blind Guardian Haven's Avatar
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    it was just a hunch from that one post, I wasn't making an informed assessment or anything
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  8. #28
    climb on Showbread's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Haven View Post
    it was just a hunch from that one post, I wasn't making an informed assessment or anything
    And an optimistic one. Not that we don't love 6s. Haven, are we the only active 2s currently?
    Friends, waffles, work

    "The problem is, when you depend on a substitute for love, you can never get enough" - Louis Cozolino

    3w2 6w7 1w2
    *Gryffindor*


  9. #29
    Blind Guardian Haven's Avatar
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    define "active" and "currently"

    There's Giggly and Thursday

    2 is not a common type, 6s and 9s are much more so
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  10. #30
    brainheart
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    Quote Originally Posted by Showbread View Post
    Are there any other 2s in the forum? I feel like I'm drowning in 4s! Which, is not a bad thing. I quite like 4s... Why are there so few 2s about??
    I don't think there are that many fours on here, honestly. But to answer your question, fours tend to be some majorly self absorbed mofos so we dig the personality theories. Lots of navel gazing involved. Meanwhile, twos tend to avoid it when it would benefit them (integrate to four).

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