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Thread: 7w6 retardation

  1. #51
    Member NKC's Avatar
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    @Magic Qwan

    yes. I'll read it through more, I can already see which ones is a maybe and which ones are a no go.
    There'd be no method if there were no madness ...

  2. #52
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chanaynay View Post
    I agree with those saying 6. You seem way too reactive to be a 7. Instincts-wise all I can say right now is sx-dom, leaning towards sx/so.



    This also points away from 7.

    To be completely honest, I'm not quite sure what happened in this thread or when you joined the forum but sorry if you've been having a rough time here so far. It's a very interesting place to be, I can guarantee that, and over time you can find some really awesome people here.
    Thank you. I was originally typed 6w7 but must admit I relate to the 7 core more so. However I'm aware I'm contrary in many ways. And I'm not sure why and just want to understand myself better so, I'm not opposed to anything at this point. I'll just say what is and what's not. Meaning what is relatable in reality and what's not.
    There'd be no method if there were no madness ...

  3. #53
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    Quote Originally Posted by NKC View Post
    Thank you. I was originally typed 6w7 but must admit I relate to the 7 core more so. However I'm aware I'm contrary in many ways. And I'm not sure why and just want to understand myself better so, I'm not opposed to anything at this point. I'll just say what is and what's not. Meaning what is relatable in reality and what's not.
    What part of core 7 do you relate to?
    7w6 - 2w3 - 8w7 sx/so


  4. #54
    Senior Member Sanjuro's Avatar
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    Guys...I'm speaking as a neutral 3rd party who so far likes everyone on this forum. It seemed to me that there were indeed some touchy responses to the OP, responses which seemed rather out of place as a response to someone seeking information and using her own words. I'm mentioning that as an observation, not a criticism--I am not surprised by NKC's responses.

    @NKC

    I don't know what you are, and I don't presume to know. I'm coming to the strong conclusion that how one writes on a forum and how one interacts IRL are two different things. I myself have been told I can't possibly be Ne/Si because my posts are "too well thought-out" or whatever. I've been told I can't possibly be Ti/Fe because I have "too much conviction" in my words. Well, whatever. I, for one, am not going to judge you based on your writing style.

    I will give you some food for thought, though.

    - First, your MBTI. Do be aware that the test itself is lame, and many people begin to see flaws in it after having studied the cognitive functions (myself included). I always test as ISTP. Every time. Even on the professionally administered official test (twice). And the scores are fairly unambiguous. So, do be aware that it is highly fallible, and be open to coming to your own understanding.

    - Second, the cognitive functions. It helps to consult the work of Jung (which you may have already done). I didn't identify with Fi at first; most of what's discussed online makes it sound like these morally inflexible sorts who resort to emo at the drop of a hat. I was sure I was Ti/Fe; it really helped to read established authors on these matters.

    - Third, the descriptions of the MBTI types. DO NOT GO BY THEM. My own family thinks the ISTP profile fits me "perfectly", yet I was never too sure about that. Actually none of them fit me (except for one that I am certainly not). My true type is somewhere in the xNFP range, and be damned if I'm putting that under my avatar. You'll get the wrong idea about me for sure. The first time I read INFP profiles, I was like, LOL, not me!! So, the profiles don't tell all; keep that in mind.

    - Fourth, your enneatype. Based on what I've seen so far the 6/7 range seems to be accurate, but keep it open to being another type. I don't know about "reactivity" making you a 6 for sure. Your posts do seem "reactive", but keep in mind 7s are surrounded by reactive types (6 and 8) and there are a number of other things in your personality that could conceivably make you respond as you have. If you were a 748, for instance, you'd have a lot of reactive strategies as well. Sevens are also quite capable of emotional honesty and aren't always the pie-in-the-sky avoidant people that they have the reputation of being.

    - Last, it's possible to be borderline in your enneagram type. I was between 4 and 5 for a really long time. What helped me was to study the triads:
    • reactive, competency, positive outlook
    • frustration, rejection, attachment
    • withdrawn, assertive, compliant


    If you look into those, it might shed some light on it. As a 6, you should be reactive, attachment, compliant. As a 7, you should identify much more with positive, frustration, assertive. You may have already seen this on PerC, but here you go:
    http://personalitycafe.com/enneagram...am-triads.html

    If you still have lingering doubts, it might help to make a list of the recurrent issues and important things you've seen about yourself throughout your life, write about how you experience each of them, and then read it over as if you were another person. I find that to be a far better indication of type than how you respond to various questionnaires on other websites (I tend to get typed 6w7, which just sounds bizarre to a 4w5). I'll even read it over if you're comfortable sharing.

  5. #55
    Step into my office. Luv Deluxe's Avatar
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    @NKC - I happily accept the possibility of any MBTI matching up with any point on the Enneagram, and speaking as one who identifies as both a 7 and INFJ, I might have some useful insight here.

    INFJ and 7 together is a strange personality. It's conflicting in places and typically doesn't make sense to those who have not had to intimately consider the possibility for themselves. Having said that, I am going to challenge your type - and not because you've combined them as you have.

    Although you insist that you are not, you do seem (or at least initially, did seem) rather sensitive to others' questioning of this pairing. Yes, it's not what you asked for, but it could play an important role in sussing out what type you actually are, Enneagram and otherwise. Your reactions were a little quick and accusatory, but what gets me the most was your level of surprise.

    As far as I'm concerned, it's a foregone conclusion that there will be many people who look at a type 7 INFJ and declare that such a thing can't exist. Some of them will not take you seriously, unfortunately. It's hard not to be painfully aware of the fact that this is such an oddball personality. Consequently, your reactions seemed a bit hasty and insecure to me, without forethought or broader perception.

    (I feel quite secure in my own self-typing, but I could consider another MBTI type if someone were able to logically convince me that it was a better fit. So far, nobody has done this, and I have developed a rather persuasive system for explaining the bizarre juxtaposition of my cognitive functions and preferences with the fears and drives of a type 7.)

    Additionally, you don't write like an INFJ. Your words meander without any apparent sense of calculation. Writers typically know how to use their linguistic tools, and I consider communication an art. I write, and I write often, because I love doing it. I have general visions of whatever it is I'm intending to say, and I then craft that statement carefully when I wish for my words to have an impact. My perspective is subjective, of course, but I have a hard time with the concept of an INFJ who writes the way that you have and then finds herself caught off guard when others challenge it. Not saying that it couldn't happen! It's just highly unusual.

    I'm also getting a lot of Fi, very little Fe. Fe would probably not toss the word "retarded" around and then go, "Hey, fuck you guys if you wanna call bullshit, but please don't be offended, but really, why are you guys so pissed off, jeez." Not when dealing with first impressions, anyway.

    (This isn't to say that I don't have a lot of "fuck you" in my own personality. I do. I have tons of it; however, I generally know when and where to apply it for best results.)

    I've also noticed that you seem pretty hung up on your past. I'd like to know how you feel about the future, where your focus is, and how you perceive time.

    I could more easily swallow the 7 pill, but I'm not one hundred percent convinced there, either. You seem quite reactive, maybe even accidentally steering yourself into conflict - but I've often done this myself (my sexual variant may be to blame), and a heavy 6-wing might contribute to your push/pull energy.

    Type 7 isn't just about having a sunny disposition, either. Remember, the Enneagram is about coping mechanisms, what we fear and what we want out of life. Why are you such a fun-loving, pleasant person? Do you do it for yourself? Do you do it for the people around you? What's your main goal when you try to keep things light and fluffy and feel-good?

    7s seek external distraction because their inner worlds terrify them. While it is (probably significantly) less common, this does not mean that 7s cannot be introverts. I'm not an extreme introvert, but I'm introverted nonetheless; people and crowds do not bother me, but I find that I don't really need them for energy and will eventually tire of them. (I don't really need anything for energy, actually, I have some insane internal surplus that probably borders on clinical, but that's going off-topic.)

    I still reach out to my environment or interact with it in other ways, though. For example, if I'm not working, I will write a lot, plan my next trip, check airfare, try the new restaurant across the street, take photographs and spend hours editing them for my latest project du jour, do research on my newest hobby, play NHL 14 until my thumbs bleed - anything, really, as long as I'm not experiencing any kind of stasis. Boredom is the root of all evil, and provides ample opportunity for those internal anxieties to confront me. (Fortunately, my internal wellspring of creativity is so great that I rarely ever experience boredom.)

    Anecdote/example time: I was feeling a little unhappy earlier this week, and I ended up (twice) at a dance club, getting drunk and losing myself in those awesomely beautiful strobe lights. The second time, after I'd sobered up, I walked to my car and drove first to the grocery store and then home. On the way, I spontaneously burst into tears. Dance club = me running from unhappiness, drive home = just enough time to think about my actual volume of happiness. I always purge those gross emotions quickly, rebounding to feel great again within hours, but it's there, and it's one of the biggest driving factors in my whole existence.

    Having said all of that, I'm not a healthy 7. Not unhealthy either, just average, floating around mid-range, doing things average 7s do. It's entirely possible that your especially bubbly disposition could be related to a higher tier of health (and/or higher levels of extroversion). I don't know you personally, of course, so all of my opinions here are meant to gently suggest new possibilities and get you to ask questions that, perhaps, you haven't considered before - or disclosed to us.

    Ultimately, I cannot and will not say what type you are, NKC, because only you can decide that - no matter what anybody tells you. I'm only sharing the little things I've noticed, so take them with a grain/block/semi-load of salt. If new opinions are what you're after, well...maybe you can get to the small details if you refocus on the big picture first. More information is needed, I think.

    I hope I haven't stepped on your toes, but this is something you might want to think about if you're seriously invested in figuring yourself out in the name of personal development. (If you'd like to know a secret, I actually put more stock in the Enneagram at this point than I do MBTI.)

    Anyway, it's late, and if I go to sleep now I'll still get two hours before I have to start my day. It's going to be another Red Bull breakfast, I think.

    Oh, and welcome to the forum.

    EDIT: @Sanjuro has some very good points as well - great post.
    AMERICAN TRASH
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    ~ Gryffindor on the streets, Slytherin in the sheets ~

  6. #56
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sanjuro View Post
    If you still have lingering doubts, it might help to make a list of the recurrent issues and important things you've seen about yourself throughout your life, write about how you experience each of them, and then read it over as if you were another person. I find that to be a far better indication of type than how you respond to various questionnaires on other websites (I tend to get typed 6w7, which just sounds bizarre to a 4w5). I'll even read it over if you're comfortable sharing.
    Thank you so much for your honest feedback

    I do believe 6/7 is accurate however they mingle. I will have to do more research on my own in order to figure out the rest of my tripod. There is a purpose in my mind that initiates my inquiry. After reviewing and taking the quiz PM'd to me last night, I believe I prefer your suggestion. Not that the person was inaccurate that his quiz was a good inventory. Rather, some of the questions don't necessarily fit. I use the forums online as a sort of wall to bounce my thoughts off of so I don't drown my in real life friends with my intensity, lol! I prefer to keep very quiet about my problems, struggles and so on, that reside in my head. I tend to always be that person people confide in, and I'm viewed as this strong person (which I'm not saying I am not) however, I too fall in in between the cracks of reason in my head and I tend to struggle to get out. Forums have been a sweet spot to replace the tedious application of books to figure things out. make sense?

    Anyhow, the reactivness. I tend to always see things from all angles and take everything within context. One reason why I tend to tease people super hung up on grammar. I suppose I figure, if you read the sentence within context, there should be no question as to which "they're", "their" or "there" the author was referring to. lol! With that being said, (with a fresh cup of coffee in hand and not at the end of a long weekend), everything within context. I'm a single parent of a disabled child which is no secret to anyone on PerC, which I am very active and have been for over a year. I've never had my type interrogated, let alone questioned (minus the initial introduction to the forum). I have several common infj stereotypes which I saw as "walls" that I broke within my head, prior to becoming active online. And as is typical of my type, I wanted to counsel everyone initially because I had been there and done that, and wanted to spare everyone the arduous tasks of learning those lessons. Of course I've later realized that is not how the world works, not everyone thinks like me and so on. Inevitably deepening my understanding to the following: advice is a tricky thing to deliver because, while many are smart enough to learn by other people's mistakes, it's as if the actual experience acts as a catalyst for assimilation for what we already know. examples would be those cliche's we're often told as children. yeah yeah yeah, I know I know we murmur .. only to years later fuck up and remember the lesson we already knew.

    Patterns throughout my life? that list I have no qualms about sharing. I haven't any idea how or why but I superceeded fear a long time ago and take advantage of my strength in vulnerability (which is such a fucked up thing. it's when we fear opening up and being honest that renders us vulnerable. once you open up to vulnerability, you realize it matters not and then you're no longer vulnerable) how fucked up is that! lol! Sorry. focusing :p

    so patterns would most definitely be my preoccupation with whatever it is that makes us human. I am insatiably curious about people. I like to take in as much as possible and I organize and play with everything in my head. (very much like tetris) lol! loved that game!!! I know, I'm the lamest person alive. I actually LIKE to organize. I have also had the pattern in my life to make quick judgments and clump things into categories and I must admit, my best friend in real life is VERY much INFP. and has really (after a blow up every now and then, lol!) she has helped me balance out so much. And I her. I tend to constantly force her to THINK about feelings, and feel them less. She has in turn encouraged me to feel more or rather, try to not be so rigid. Despite the inclination to always want to know everything, and where I'm going etc. (I hate surprises) I DO very much LOVE variety and gathering data of what's different and trying to fit it into the system in my head so I can be smarter or do things more proficiently. of course, efficiency isn't necessarily my strong suit. :/

    honestly. the enng curiosity is more in tune with relationship. I see many other INFJ's struggle with things I've surpassed and yet, I still struggle in a way too and I'm not so sure why if I've "outgrown" those mind sets or tendencies. Like, having relationships in your head :p Passivity is something I abhor now, I've gained enough self awareness to see the absolute terrible effect it can have on relationship. It's not easy to this day because I do cherish a sense of harmony. I HATE conflict. It's incredibly draining and if I wasn't prepared for it it's even worse! I get all sorts of frazzled as was apparent on this thread. The enng focus is the fact that I seem to always be asserting my independence and crave having guidance, like a mentor. Someone to look up to. I'm pretty much sapiosexual and this is a problem. I'm in my early thirties now and not to be too TMI but I'd like to lay down the "prude" card. not that I am within a relationship. just that it is always ALL or nothing with me. and I can't seem to get into "casual" relationships. yet, despite people's interests in me, I never really get hooked. when I do get hooked it's generally with someone unavailable in one way or another, or a dead person like James Joyce :p Hemmingway was SUPER cute too though, lol!! ... anyways, I think what the hell is my problem!!! I also HATE being "needy" and I fight that. so even if I miss someone super bad, it takes all my inner courage to force myself just to say "I miss you". when I'm loving someone I want to dote on them copiously. Always being there for them, be crazy loyal yet still speaking my mind, but it's just gross. It just seems needy to me and I tend to not fall for guys that are like that TOO much back. Yes, I want affection back! but if it's too much I feel crowded and overwhelmed. I'll get incredibly aggitated if I don't get my alone time. Interestingly enough, forum activity is sometimes when I'm energized, and sometimes forum activity is during my recharge (collect information) alone time. does that make sense?

    I just would really like a better understanding of myself and thought that if I new my full enng with insticts I might be more able to move forward and actually have a good relationship in reality, rather than fantasizing about it. which nauseates me admitting it but that's the whole point. If I do dating I pretty much put myself out there and it's more or less an experiment at the end of the day because of how people react to me. I always look for that easy going type but more times than not, (maybe it's the age range I'm in) I get overly anxious, excited or needy people. I don't like large parties or bars (bars I can do if I know someone already and we go every so often) but I have NO desire to find my future partner at a bar. I mean, come on. If you don't want your future partner to be an alcoholic, don't meet him at a bar. If you don't want your future partner to be a skanky hoe, maybe you shouldn't date the stripper sitting on everyone's lap for money. and so there you go. I'm a total asshole. I realize that NOT all people fit into these categories and I DO one on one, give everyone the benefit of the doubt (to a default quite often!). I've been told time and time again, that I should not have so much faith in people. but it very much feels like, if I don't have faith in people at all, I just can't do it. the thought makes me terrified and I'm not so sure why.

    So there you go. The tornado in my head has order where I stand, where it's spinning. Just that most are only privy to the outskirts where it's chaotic. and I'm always freaking people out at one point or another by being "too intense". I hate that. I love who I am, I think I'm super awesome and everything. Just that I wish I could just wash myself out just enough so I can more easily relate to people and date like a normal human being for Christs sake! :P

    So lame. I can't help but to brutally make fun of myself and laugh. It takes the edge off. lol!
    There'd be no method if there were no madness ...

  7. #57
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    YIKES! TL;DR

    Yuck. :p
    There'd be no method if there were no madness ...

  8. #58
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    @AntiheroComplex

    thank you for the input. I appreciate it. all things within context.
    I am not at all outspoken in real life. this handwriting analysis has been very intriguing.

    I suppose I wasn't sure how to react to the flack I received.
    It was a first time experience for me to be honest.
    There'd be no method if there were no madness ...

  9. #59
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    @AntiheroComplex

    I'm not hung up on my past. I'm hung up on problem solving my problem. I tend to always be moving, next.next.next. Next lesson, next chapter. I do struggle staying in the now sometimes. I'm always wanting to prepare and create something in the future. And I'm always preoccupying myself with creative little writing projects etc. while I'm trying to figure things out. My apologies if this feels rushed. I posted a tl;dr and I'm not able to be online here very long. I'll answer other question I might have missed later.
    There'd be no method if there were no madness ...

  10. #60
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    Hello, @NKC.

    I do agree with Sanjuro that one's persona and type can be very different, but these are the only "clues" those of us online have to help you, so that's what I'll go with. For what it's worth, I get the overall impression of high energy, fast thought from you. Someone mentioned Arclight... but he was more defensive from the get-go and less bouncy. You're more forthcoming and fluctuating. I'm a 6-7 type too... and your thought patterns strike me as not unlike my own - lots of planning and addressing problems, a little messy, a little tangential, a little cyclic. I too take on many different writing styles and have a hard time dealing with change.

    You asked about your instinct variant... I am still learning that... but what you've said about independence, and wanting to merge but then holding yourself back sounds sp-induced... but I would really like to hear more about what you're talking about in relationships, if you would be willing to share.

    Quote Originally Posted by NKC
    I just am curious as to what other influences fuck with my main frame when I'm emotionally involved with someone. It's like a residue that I can't get rid of. and 7w6 isn't really explaining it. I don't think personal experiences render me broken. I just think maybe some motivations that I'm not aware of ?
    Can you explain this in more detail? Like the process of what happens, your feelings, etc.?

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