User Tag List

First 16242526272836 Last

Results 251 to 260 of 683

  1. #251
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    May 2010
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    748 sx/sp
    Posts
    4,705

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Arcana View Post
    What about social 7s? so/sx, especially?

    Also, is it ever a good idea to tell a panicking 7w6 that everything will be all right? Or is that just a lazy shortcut that will do them more harm than good? How does one respond constructively to a hyperreactive 6-wing?

    If 6 just momentarily flipped-out I think it's okay to remind the 7 that everything will be ok. If you're noticing a pattern though...

    Because 7s are so often blind to their own issues/pain...over-reaction that occurs quite frequently may be a sign there's something they are unknowingly side-stepping that needs to be addressed. Here to say "everything will be fine" may merely be redundant as that is where they are headed anyway. The reaction is a frustration in a way to not feeling everything's going to be fine and they may need that feeling. IOW, they will return to positive outlook all on their own without your encouragement...

    I think in these instances it may, in fact, be more helpful to keep them sober if that makes sense.
    لا تستطيع كسر المكسور

  2. #252
    untitled Chanaynay's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2012
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    7w6 sx/so
    Posts
    5,145

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Arcana View Post
    Also, is it ever a good idea to tell a panicking 7w6 that everything will be all right? Or is that just a lazy shortcut that will do them more harm than good? How does one respond constructively to a hyperreactive 6-wing?
    oooh i just saw this. O: *chimes in as designated type you're wondering about*

    Quote Originally Posted by Starry View Post
    If 6 just momentarily flipped-out I think it's okay to remind the 7 that everything will be ok.
    yes, especially as i've come of age and my 6 wing has started to become more prominent compared to my younger self where i was just e7ing it up all the time. sometimes i'll have stress and anxiousness sitting in my mind and i have to unload my thoughts to a friend and when they say "oh i'm sure that will be fine" or "yeah everything will work out" it does provide me reassurance because it reinforces to me that it's not just me e7 self hoping that things will work out but that it's also likely by external parameters that things will work out.

    i can't truly speak for your friend, but if we are the same enneagram/instinctual variant then i can say it's likely that whenever we approach you with a problem we're always looking for a positive response. if it's something you have experience with, i want a rationalization about WHY things will work out. if it's something you don't know about, i want reassurance that from a third party POV that things should seem fine. if i get an "i don't know" response - that's only going to make me even more anxious. and if you think that things are going to make a negative turn, then you should also be prepared to offer some kind of advice on how to fix the situation rather than just let it sit with me. that will make me anxious too and i'll inevitably seek out someone else's advice.

    If you're noticing a pattern though...

    Because 7s are so often blind to their own issues/pain...over-reaction that occurs quite frequently may be a sign there's something they are unknowingly side-stepping that needs to be addressed. Here to say "everything will be fine" may merely be redundant as that is where they are headed anyway. The reaction is a frustration in a way to not feeling everything's going to be fine and they may need that feeling. IOW, they will return to positive outlook all on their own without your encouragement...

    I think in these instances it may, in fact, be more helpful to keep them sober if that makes sense.
    but yeah. the whole "everything will be fine" thing e7 can think of anyway. if it's a reoccurring theme i'm coming to someone about, my internal response to "everything will be fine" is "i know that, but do you have anything else to say that i haven't already thought of?" in that scenario, i need someone to throw me a curve ball.
    7w6 - 2w3 - 8w7 sx/so

    Likes senza tema, five sounds, Starry liked this post

  3. #253

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Starry View Post
    If 6 just momentarily flipped-out I think it's okay to remind the 7 that everything will be ok. If you're noticing a pattern though...

    Because 7s are so often blind to their own issues/pain...over-reaction that occurs quite frequently may be a sign there's something they are unknowingly side-stepping that needs to be addressed. Here to say "everything will be fine" may merely be redundant as that is where they are headed anyway. The reaction is a frustration in a way to not feeling everything's going to be fine and they may need that feeling. IOW, they will return to positive outlook all on their own without your encouragement...

    I think in these instances it may, in fact, be more helpful to keep them sober if that makes sense.
    Yeah ... my issue is mainly this .... I have a certain, very specific type that I am absurdly attracted to. Namely, the contemplative, tortured flavor of 4-fixed 7w6. I have come to accept by now that for some reason, I will keep gravitating towards these kinds of men so I'm not even going to fight it anymore.

    Anyway ... my 7w6s have all been deceptively self-aware. They seemed to have a pretty good idea of their strengths and their flaws, they even embraced and flaunted their flaws in some ways. And they were hyper aware of misfortune and opportunities for misfortune, to the extent that they would look like 6s or 4s or 1s ... anything but the cheerful, happy go lucky, high energy 7 stereotype.

    The thing is ... they have been genuinely unlucky. But unlucky is not exactly the right word ... rather, they've courted misfortune by treating their bodies like shit (I've only fallen for the intuitive 7s so far, I don't know what the sensors are like), just blithely ignoring all kinds of things until it's too late to fix them, assessing their abilities over-optimistically and rashly jumping into things based on those assessments, only to realize later that everything sucks ... shit like that. So they develop this perception of themselves as people who are beating back impossible odds, who are constantly being dumped on by fate, who are trapped by their circumstances, etc. And then, they start really truly succumbing to their 6 wing and coming up with all kinds of complicated and extremely unlikely nightmare, worst case scenarios ... What if this happens? What if that goes wrong? What if I never succeed? What if I'm never fulfilled? I'm stupid and dumb and can't do anything right. MY LIFE IS GOING TO SUCK FOREVER.

    But even while they're going through all this negative self-talk ... they still won't take any real steps to fix it. They have agile minds. They are good with excuses ... so good that they convince both themselves and others time and time again. 7s are master hoodwinkers, especially because they believe in their own stories so often. And, like you said, they focus on relatively minor pains and flaws to avoid examining and working on the real thing.

    As for my role? Even while I recognize the traps they are setting for themselves and for me ... I can't but sympathize with them and their plight, however self-inflicted it might be. I hate to see people I love in any kind of discomfort. Everything in me yearns to swoop in and flush it out and love them so much that it washes away their pain (and hope not-so-secretly that they do the same for me .... which doesn't go down so well either ...)

    Anyway, I still haven't come to any conclusion about whether that's a good thing or a bad thing. On the one hand, I can't and shouldn't keep saving them from themselves or they will continue to go through life without any inkling of real consequences. On the other hand, how can I sit back when they're hurting? It is really really hard.

    4s and 7s are bad for each other.
    Last edited by senza tema; 12-01-2014 at 08:21 PM.
    Likes The Wailing Specter, Starry liked this post

  4. #254
    The Dark Lord The Wailing Specter's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2013
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    6w7 sp/so
    Socionics
    ENFP Ne
    Posts
    3,179

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Luv Deluxe View Post
    Okay, yeah. I remember talking about this in a thread some time ago - can't remember whose thread it was, but the general consensus there among many of the posters seemed to be that one shouldn't seriously consider themselves an sx-dom without the symptoms of being a hopeless romantic or being literally sexually driven in some disproportionate sense. I kept insisting that the instinct could take or leave actual relationships with people, depending on how it manifests; it's mostly about that energy, that moth-to-the-flame attraction to pretty much anything that captivates the person, sexual or not.

    I get a little bummed out when I see the sexual instinct described as the "one-on-one" instinct, because I think it reinforces the idea that we are focusing all of our energy on mating in a very concrete sense. It frames the instinct around people, not the everything that it can be.

    It was just the word "virginal" that threw me; I don't see myself that way, but that's me, and it's probably independent of my instinct. One could be an sx-dom 7 and be quite sexual with their chosen people, but I don't think it's...required, and to assume that it is creates a sort of false stereotype. I think we're on the same page.

    I once read an article that described the sx/sp stacking as "the Hungry Ghost," which I liked in spite of its depressing implications. It does have the potential to be a darker, more conflicted stacking, I think. The "hunger" described there meshes nicely with the Seven vice, but conjures a slightly different image. One that still works, but seems less like a nymphomaniac running from club to club with reckless abandon.



    YES! This. A thousand times, this.
    Hungry ghost…
    Enneagram: 6w7 (phobic) > 2w1 > 9w1
    Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
    Holland Code: AIS
    Date of Birth: March 15, 1996
    Gender: Male
    Political Stance: Libertarian Liberal (Arizona School/Strong BHL)
    ATHEIST UNITARIAN UNIVERSALIST HUMANIST
    and
    SCIENCE ENTHUSIAST


    I say this as a reminder to myself, but this goes for everyone:

    You can achieve anything you set your mind to, and you are limited only by how dedicated you are to succeed!

    -Magic Qwan
    Likes Starry liked this post

  5. #255
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    May 2010
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    748 sx/sp
    Posts
    4,705

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Chanaynay View Post
    According to Naranjo, they're the goody-two-shoes who want to be admired for being socially perfect or something like that.

    According to Maitri, they're more about sacrificing their independence for social ideals and responsibilities to their social surroundings. I think Riso and Hudson said something similar.

    Theorists have different ideas about social 7s (and other subtypes like sexual 2s). That's why I prefer to keep the core enneagram type and the instinctual variant independent from each other. I resonate most with 7 and so/sx. Trying to mix them usually leads to confusion. It can work and is useful to consider but idk about me. But Starry also still thinks I'm sx/so I think. But now that I've stuck with 728 I recall her saying she'd consider so/sx. I wonder where she still stands with that.

    Trying to answer all of these awesome posts in order.

    I do see an attachment to a "good" image with 7 so in spite of how good or "not good" they may in fact be. I also suspect 7 so are more likely to be 3 fixed ExTPs but I don't know that for certain. I think because you are balanced though...it may be possible for you to actually be so dominant...but relate to 7 sx. Again, it's difficult with you. I am confident in your MBTI, core e-type and now tritype...but that balanced variant is challenging as I see both...practical and extravagant in you.
    لا تستطيع كسر المكسور
    Likes The Wailing Specter liked this post

  6. #256
    The Dark Lord The Wailing Specter's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2013
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    6w7 sp/so
    Socionics
    ENFP Ne
    Posts
    3,179

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Arcana View Post
    Yeah ... my issue is mainly this .... I have a certain, very specific type that I am absurdly attracted to. Namely, the contemplative, tortured flavor of 4-fixed 7w6. I have come to accept by now that for some reason, I will keep gravitating towards these kinds of men so I'm not even going to fight it anymore.

    Anyway ... my 7w6s have all been deceptively self-aware. They seemed to have a pretty good idea of their strengths and their flaws, they even embraced and flaunted their flaws in some ways. And they were hyper aware of misfortune and opportunities for misfortune, to the extent that they would look like 6s or 4s or 1s ... anything but the cheerful, happy go lucky, high energy 7 stereotype.

    The thing is ... they have been genuinely unlucky. But unlucky is not exactly the right word ... rather, they've courted misfortune by treating their bodies like shit (I've only fallen for the intuitive 7s so far, I don't know what the sensors are like), just blithely ignoring all kinds of things until it's too late to fix them, assessing their abilities over-optimistically and rashly jumping into things based on those assessments, only to realize later that everything sucks ... shit like that. So they develop this perception of themselves as people who are beating back impossible odds, who are constantly being dumped on by fate, who are trapped by their circumstances, etc. And then, they start really truly succumbing to their 6 wing and coming up with all kinds of complicated and extremely unlikely nightmare, worst case scenarios ... What if this happens? What if that goes wrong? What if I never succeed? What if I'm never fulfilled? I'm stupid and dumb and can't do anything right. MY LIFE IS GOING TO SUCK FOREVER.

    But even while they're going through all this negative self-talk ... they still won't take any real steps to fix it. They have agile minds. They are good with excuses ... so good that they convince both themselves and others time and time again. 7s are master hoodwinkers, especially because they believe in their own stories so often. And, like you said, they focus on relatively minor pains and flaws to avoid examining and working on the real thing.

    As for my role? Even while I recognize the traps they are setting for themselves and for me ... I can't but sympathize with them and their plight, however self-inflicted it might be. I hate to see people I love in any kind of discomfort. Everything in me yearns to swoop in and flush it out and love them so much that it washes away their pain (and hope not-so-secretly that they do the same for me .... which doesn't go down so well either ...)

    Anyway, I still haven't come to any conclusion about whether that's a good thing or a bad thing. On the one hand, I can't and shouldn't keep saving them from themselves or they will continue to go through life without any inkling of real consequences. On the other hand, how can I sit back when they're hurting? It is really really hard.

    4s and 7s are bad for each other.
    Talking about me?
    Enneagram: 6w7 (phobic) > 2w1 > 9w1
    Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
    Holland Code: AIS
    Date of Birth: March 15, 1996
    Gender: Male
    Political Stance: Libertarian Liberal (Arizona School/Strong BHL)
    ATHEIST UNITARIAN UNIVERSALIST HUMANIST
    and
    SCIENCE ENTHUSIAST


    I say this as a reminder to myself, but this goes for everyone:

    You can achieve anything you set your mind to, and you are limited only by how dedicated you are to succeed!

    -Magic Qwan
    Likes senza tema, Starry liked this post

  7. #257
    Senior Member cm81's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2014
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    714 sx/sp
    Socionics
    infj Ni
    Posts
    322

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Starry View Post
    This is really, really good cm. Do you know your wing yet? (if you have already said forgive me as I've been distracted here lately.) I would also be interested in how you decided on sx/sp.

    For 7w6 sx/sp are the most introverted and potentially troubled which is why I've wondered if Magic Qwan is in fact one as well (although I would advise he never list his type as sx/sp during his tenure here because it would be challenged as much if not more than INFJ 7 - people misunderstand sexual dominance in general long before combining it with e7. Sexual 7s are probably the most "virginal" of all the points.)

    I'm trying to figure out how you got to where you are without making a negative connection to e5. I'm going to need to to comment more in this thread so as to help me get to where you are.
    Therein lies an occasionally raging battle; scrupulous probity vs inexhaustible desire. It's easy to imagine catching fire, like tectonics crashing constantly beneath the surface, the schism isn't always visible. The careening power of Ni is my greatest asset.

    I went and took the tri type tests...

    7w8 2w3 9w8

    After exams next week, I'd like to delve more into this, especially with regards to the integration and disintegration....

    In the meantime, I must pull my head out of my soul(all these narcissistic rabbit holes) and put a leash on my heart(again (to chase the dream)). I will hug the earth.

    [SOUNDCLOUD]https://soundcloud.com/aselephantsare/as-elephants-are-kingdom-2[/SOUNDCLOUD]
    "The true genius shudders at incompleteness, preferring silence to everything that it should be." Edgar Allen Poe

    "There's a magic inside,
    Just waiting to burst out.
    There world is a goldmine-
    That will melt tomorrow."M83
    Likes Starry liked this post

  8. #258
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    May 2010
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    748 sx/sp
    Posts
    4,705

    Default

    I wanted to quickly say here that I'm loving all the posts in this thread and apologize because I have like 5,000 things I want to say in response to each one and so instead I'm completely distracted by all kinds of other crap(?)

    I am determined to say all I want to say but in the meantime...

    I just appreciate every one of you so much.
    لا تستطيع كسر المكسور
    Likes cm81, senza tema, corpseparty liked this post

  9. #259

    Default

    I have inquired about Enneagram before on this site, and the stacking, but never found an answer that resonated with me. I know I am definitely 7w8, but am unsure about what the other 2 combinations mean, in terms of what that means about my personality.

    Intrigued by the discussion in this thread, and following the example of the post above, I took the Enneagram tritype test.

    Here are my results:

    Your trifix is 7w8, 1w2, 3w4.

    In enneagram theory, you have one type for how you relate to the world (either 8, 9, or 1), one type for how you think (5, 6, 7) and one type for how you see yourself (2, 3, 4.) Your tri-fix contains one number from each of these triads. They are listed in the order of how strongly they present in your personality.

    Your core type (your strongest type) is Type 7 with an 8 wing: Type Seven individuals are energetic, engaging, and playful. They have a love for life and can easily jump from one exciting topic to the next. The Type Seven thought process is a bit scattered, but that’s because they are easily interested in many different things. This is why Type Seven is often called The Enthusiast. When in a growth state, Type Sevens become focused like Type Fives. When they’re stressed, they become a perfectionist like a Type One. The enthusiastic nature of the Type Seven combines with the aggressive nature of the Type Eight, making 7w8 one of the most assertive types in the Enneagram.

    Your second type (your next strongest type) is Type 1 with a 2 wing: Type One individuals have a very finely tuned sense of right and wrong, and they chart the course of their lives by following a righteous path. This doesn’t have to be religious… it can be any set of principles that the Type One finds ethical. Ones are perfectionists, often setting high standards for themselves and others. Type One may very well be the noblest type in the Enneagram. When a Type One is in a state of growth, they become excited and joyous like a Type Seven. When a Type One is stressed, they become emotional and overwhelmed like an unhealthy Type Four. You are a Type One with a Two wing, which means that the righteous traits of a Type One combine with the helpful nature of a Type Two. This makes you naturally inclined to advocate on behalf of other people, and the welfare of others is probably an important part of your worldview.

    Your third type (the least-used of the three) is Type 3 with a 4 wing: Type Three individuals are self-assured, confident, and driven for success. Type Threes have a great deal of energy that propels them to excel at their chosen field, and this is why the type is often called The Achiever. Although Threes may not always like it, they’re often looked up to. Type Threes, more than any other type, are the most likely to be a workaholic. When in a state of growth, Threes become more cooperative and trusting of others, like a Type Six. When stressed, Threes become withdrawn like a Type Nine. You are a Type Three with a Four wing, which means that your energetic nature is tempered by a Four tendency to withdraw, which gives you a sense of calm that others often lack.

    Some words that describe you: principled, moralistic, perfectionist, self-critical, ambitious, driven, adaptable, energetic, enthusiastic, energetic, spontaneous, fun.
    It's a very cursory description, that seems very high-level, and feels a bit like confirmation bias, because there are bits and pieces that I can say, "yes, me!" but I feel like others, who are very different than me in personality, can say the same, too.


    Also, does the above help point to a specific stacking? I have debated with myself between sp/sx (doesn't seem to *quite* hit the mark) and the sx/sp (some descriptions of this, seem really off, but I did come across different degrees of sp's influence on sx, so sx/sp (weak) vs. sx/sp (moderate) vs sx/sp (strong) - and in this even further breaking down, some resonance is found).

    Any wisdom from others (esp. knowledgeable 7s) is appreciated.

  10. #260
    Tier 1 Member LunaLuminosity's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    MBTI
    ENTP
    Enneagram
    7w6 so/sp
    Socionics
    ILE
    Posts
    2,485

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Starry View Post
    “Life will break you. Nobody can protect you from that. And living alone won't either, for solitude will also break you with its yearning. You have to love. You have to feel. It is the reason you are here on earth. You are here to risk your heart. You are here to be swallowed up. And when it happens that you are broken, or betrayed, or left, or hurt, or death brushes near, let yourself sit by an apple tree and listen to the apples falling all around you in heaps, wasting their sweetness.

    Tell yourself you tasted as many as you could.”

    -Louise Erdrich




    The type 7 who actually likes this stuff is mistyped, extremely developed, or completely bonkers.

Similar Threads

  1. Possible types based on Wisdom of the Enneagram tests
    By Grublet in forum What's my Type?
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 07-03-2015, 09:37 AM
  2. [Enneagram] The Wisdom of the Enneagram (Riso and Hudson)
    By highlander in forum Typology and Psychology Book Reviews
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 03-18-2014, 09:11 AM
  3. The Wisdom Of Foolishness
    By highlander in forum The Bonfire
    Replies: 15
    Last Post: 04-15-2010, 12:00 AM
  4. The Wisdom of Hate Crimes <split>
    By Lateralus in forum Politics, History, and Current Events
    Replies: 41
    Last Post: 01-26-2009, 10:54 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts