What's your relationship to Type 1 like? There's some love/hate there.
Admiration & a fear of having my individuality blotted out in order to function "properly".
And that's directed at both the 1 within myself & 1s outside myself.
Do you know any Ones?
Oh yeah. I have varying opinions of them, depending on the individual in question.
They can be frustrated by me, and I may find them uptight. But I can also admire their integrity & their genuine motivation for "doing what is right". And with some 7 in there, they can be fun, happy people (the lower functioning ones can seem so pious in their unhappiness).
Did you once think you were a One? Absolutely not. Don't relate to the profile, do relate to certain attitudes, but they manifest in my personality differently.
How does it feel to integrate to One? Concern over "losing myself" - having to edit myself to the point of losing all passion, creativity & individuality. Ashamed of the inner goody-good that is uptight & moralistic, because it signals a kind of dry, dullness that triggers insecurity over "significance".
"Charlotte sometimes dreams a wall around herself. But it's always with love - So much love it looks like everything else. Charlotte Sometimes - So far away, glass sealed and pretty." - The Cure
I've come to like my integration point of 1. I think a healthy 4 is quite a beautiful thing because our 1-ness has a deep root in knowing, living and accepting the flaws, scars and pain of 4. We've experienced deep agony and darkness, and so make judgments with that in mind. It's like the ultimate loving truth. Since 4's are pretty cuttingly honest with themselves, I believe we are also not susceptible to the self righteous blindness that 1s are.
This however, is exactly why I do have issues with 1s sometimes-- their legalism, strictness and black and white vision does not have the same back-story and roots that I do as a healthy 4. There's nothing to temper/bring them down to earth or give them perspective for the underdog. I do know individual 1s that I respect and like, but those individuals have tempered their serious 1-ness with a healthy dose of fun loving 7.
I never thought I was a 1, but do score high-ish in that realm when I test. When I integrate to 1 I can be harshly judgmental, but usually in an objective way. I don't like rules that make sense to be broken. If they are without good cause, I can have a pretty visceral reaction. I think my integration to 1 also shows up in my ability to discern well, though my 4 tendency to check myself is really what makes that possible. 1s are quick to discern but tend to value Being Right over Truth (in my opinion). My 4 roots cause me to value Truth above all else, even if it makes me wrong.
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What's your relationship to Type 1 like?
No particular relationship. The low points annoy the hell out of me, but healthy One is my highest ideal. (Most of this is based on theory rather than experience).
Do you know any Ones?
I think my grandmother was a soc-1w2, very healthy and a lot of fun to hang around with. I took shelter with another 1 for a couple months once when I left my parents' house. She was mostly cool and really sociable, but harbored a lot of resentment about things I honestly thought were quite piddly--not sweeping the crumbs into the garbage for instance (the sort of thing in life I'm hardly aware of). I still like them both, though.
Did you once think you were a One?
I never did. I considered it for about 5 minutes since I can be quite perfectionistic, am prone to frustration, and apparently hold rigorous standards that other people are far more aware of than I am...but I simply lack those motivations and don't identify much with core 1 issues.
I did type as being 1-fixed when I was typed at 6 in order to account for that connection. But it's simply not the way I tend to handle my anger and it's not my overall outlook on life.
How does it feel to integrate to One?
More productive--you're actually taking action to complete your ideal rather than just wallow in thought and fantasy. At 1, I pride myself on being able to be super objective, fair, and rational when dealing with crises or other life situations.
In my case, integration can also involve "self improvement"--which is actually much harder for me, because that generally entails me "fixing" something inherent in me that I feel should not be violated (becoming more "sociable" when I'm clearly cut out for being a loner skulking in a cloud of gloom on the margins of society, for instance). This can feel like "selling out"--every time I've had to do this, it's been intensely sad, painful, and repulsive, but ultimately has led to enormous personal growth and a broader perspective on myself and life. I always wind up being glad I changed something.
The low side of 1, though, is just criticality and judgement, using moralistic arguments about what people "should" do to cover up the fact that I'm feeling envious and deprived of everything they have. Cut someone down to size. We're equals now. (I feel like the DoD/DoI theory goes both ways).
I used to be affiliated with a girl who typed herself as a type 1 INFJ (though she was probably wrong on both cases) and not only were her causes narrow minded and black-and-white but she had a stick up her ass which was pretty much protruding from her neck. Her understanding struck me as primitive and after I got sick of her attempts to eclipse my autonomy and freedom (and her neediness) I cut her out of my life. Didn't need any of it.
I am open to the prospect however of integrating to One. Unfortunately from what I've seen (and how I am) I think the only One I could ever truly respect would be me.
As a 6w5, I have encountered two different 1w9's in my work-life. In one instance, I discovered that I truly enjoy the relationship. This first 1w9 seems enlightened and respectful of varying viewpoints and opinions. The other 1w9 has a tougher time with ideas that are different than his own. This second 1w9 appears to be less happy and more stressed. He may struggle with depression, as 1's sometimes may internalize anger to the detriment of their health. I truly enjoy the company of the first 1w9 and I intentionally avoid contact with the latter. Hope this helps.
What's your relationship to Type 1 like? Do you know any Ones? Did you once think you were a One? How does it feel to integrate to One?
1/2- They are both fascinating and repulsive by turns. Fascinating because there is that sense of the immovable object of confidence that is so often elusive... Repulsive because of the same... the concern that one will become boring/staid, etc. (Even though most 1's I meet are not boring at all. I think it is more of the abstract prethinking of one's.)
4- Strange... like coming home and finding all the decorations are white... and the walls are white... and the floor is white... but there is a fragrance in the air suggesting that flowers had recently been in the room only moments before arrival.