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  1. #1
    Senior Member Cloud of Thunder's Avatar
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    Default Relationship With Type 4?

    What's your relationship to Type 4 like? Do you know any Fours? Did you once think you were a Four? How does it feel to disintegrate to Four?
    The only way out is through. The faster you're in, the better.

  2. #2
    this is my winter song EJCC's Avatar
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    Never thought I was a four. Thought I had a four fix, for a bit, but three makes more sense.

    Besides that, I'll quote from my post on the disintegration thread:

    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    I'm trying to change my attitude towards fours. My gut reaction is colored by my experience disintegrating to four, which means that I constantly project onto them. "Would you people calm down?? No one cares about this as much as you do! Take a chill pill and get back to real life!" = my reaction to myself when I'm in that mood, as well as my internal reaction to emotional fours.

    It's almost exactly the same as my instinctive reaction to INFPs, because in both cases, I view their displays of emotion as "overreaction". It's frustrating, because it gets in the way of actually handling INFPs and fours appropriately when they get upset. (I've had an upset INFP 4 friend get even more upset when I didn't react emotionally enough to the same thing she was reacting to! Apparently she bitched me out behind my back for being "cold-hearted". )
    ~ g e t f e s t i v e ! ~


    EJCC: "The Big Questions in my life right now: 1) What am I willing to live with? 2) What do I have to live with? 3) What can I change for the better?"
    Coriolis: "Is that the ESTJ Serenity Prayer?"



    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
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    want to ask me something? go for it!

  3. #3
    Senior Member Cloud of Thunder's Avatar
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    Any other Ones out there?
    The only way out is through. The faster you're in, the better.

  4. #4
    reflecting pool Typh0n's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cloud of Thunder View Post
    Any other Ones out there?
    EJCC's respone wasnt good enough?

  5. #5
    Senior Member Cloud of Thunder's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Typh0n View Post
    EJCC's respone wasnt good enough?
    On the contrary, it was great. But surely there are other Ones on this forum?
    The only way out is through. The faster you're in, the better.

  6. #6
    So she did. small.wonder's Avatar
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    Oh, I would love to hear other 1 perspectives on this as well. I know a 1 who says very passive aggressive things to me almost every time we interact. I'm not sure what to make of it (we don't know one another very well) but it's taken me quite off guard every time.

    I'd love to know what's behind that though.
    @SD45T-2 Whatcha think?
    Find my Enneagram writing here. Also, I'd love for you to take my six question Enneagram surveyEnneagram survey!✨

  7. #7
    Sweet Ocean Cloud SD45T-2's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by small.wonder View Post
    Oh, I would love to hear other 1 perspectives on this as well. I know a 1 who says very passive aggressive things to me almost every time we interact. I'm not sure what to make of it (we don't know one another very well) but it's taken me quite off guard every time.

    I'd love to know what's behind that though.
    @SD45T-2 Whatcha think?
    I guess pent up resentment over ... something. I can't think of anyone I know IRL who is a 4.
    1w2-6w5-3w2 so/sp

    "I took one those personality tests. It came back negative." - Dan Mintz

  8. #8
    So she did. small.wonder's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SD45T-2 View Post
    I guess pent up resentment over ... something. I can't think of anyone I know IRL who is a 4.
    Thanks anyway! I agree that it's resentment but since we are just acquaintances its got to be something small. I have a feeling it's the fact that I kind of do, say, and am what I choose. Do you suppose that might make her mad because I'm not conforming to what she might see as right? We have the same spiritural and moral beleifs though so maybe it's cultural? An example: I found out recently that she's into vintage stuff too, but you'd never know because she never wears it (just likes it). Perhaps she doesn't feel like its "allowed" or "appropriate" to wear in our vastly jeans-wearing church community, and seeing that I wear whatever I want makes her mad? Or maybe she sees me as an exhibitionist!? Woah, that could be it (though truly I am not).

    Sorry, I often come to conclusions while talking or typing. Does that sound feasible to you?
    Find my Enneagram writing here. Also, I'd love for you to take my six question Enneagram surveyEnneagram survey!✨

  9. #9
    Sweet Ocean Cloud SD45T-2's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by small.wonder View Post
    Thanks anyway! I agree that it's resentment but since we are just acquaintances its got to be something small. I have a feeling it's the fact that I kind of do, say, and am what I choose. Do you suppose that might make her mad because I'm not conforming to what she might see as right? We have the same spiritural and moral beleifs though so maybe it's cultural? An example: I found out recently that she's into vintage stuff too, but you'd never know because she never wears it (just likes it). Perhaps she doesn't feel like its "allowed" or "appropriate" to wear in our vastly jeans-wearing church community, and seeing that I wear whatever I want makes her mad? Or maybe she sees me as an exhibitionist!? Woah, that could be it (though truly I am not).

    Sorry, I often come to conclusions while talking or typing. Does that sound feasible to you?
    I guess that could be it.
    1w2-6w5-3w2 so/sp

    "I took one those personality tests. It came back negative." - Dan Mintz

  10. #10
    this is my winter song EJCC's Avatar
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    You didn't ask me, but:
    Quote Originally Posted by small.wonder View Post
    Thanks anyway! I agree that it's resentment but since we are just acquaintances its got to be something small. I have a feeling it's the fact that I kind of do, say, and am what I choose. Do you suppose that might make her mad because I'm not conforming to what she might see as right? We have the same spiritural and moral beleifs though so maybe it's cultural? An example: I found out recently that she's into vintage stuff too, but you'd never know because she never wears it (just likes it). Perhaps she doesn't feel like its "allowed" or "appropriate" to wear in our vastly jeans-wearing church community, and seeing that I wear whatever I want makes her mad? Or maybe she sees me as an exhibitionist!? Woah, that could be it (though truly I am not).

    Sorry, I often come to conclusions while talking or typing. Does that sound feasible to you?
    That all seems feasible. I could see her being annoyed by the fact that perhaps, in her eyes, you break important rules of social conduct without realizing that what you're doing is "wrong". Though her behavior seems unnecessarily bitchy -- and not at all productive/constructive -- it could easily be motivated by that. Could be made worse if she's jealous, wishing she could also dress like that without being seen as deviant/strange/what have you.
    ~ g e t f e s t i v e ! ~


    EJCC: "The Big Questions in my life right now: 1) What am I willing to live with? 2) What do I have to live with? 3) What can I change for the better?"
    Coriolis: "Is that the ESTJ Serenity Prayer?"



    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
    1w2/7w6/3w4 so/sx (enneagram)
    want to ask me something? go for it!

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