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  1. #1
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    Default Eights: What Enneagram type do you know you are head over heels attracted to?

    I know regardless of what people say there is one answer to this. I know my whole life I have always walked around saying I only want a man with a temper. It wasn't until I got older that I realized this was an Enneagram 8. I have this amazing chemistry with them. I feel like when we meet, I have met my match; the missing part of me is complete. So I am wondering if this makes me Eight-ish or Nine-ish, maybe even One-ish? I know there is one answer to this question because it's such a mutual chemistry. Which type do you feel this with?

    I know in the compatibility charts, it seems like the Eight and Nine have a good chemistry the way it is described, but that doesn't quite make sense to me, because I would feel like Eights would see them as less passionate. At the same time, I felt like when I am around these Eights, I feel like I bring the softer side of things, yet strength, but the softer side of me may just be because I am an INFJ. I dated this ESTP Eight and we were a match made in Heaven, he was like the doer, protective, provider, and I brought the ideas, imagination, and nurturing to everything, plus I felt strong with him. In some ways I felt like I taught him confidence and strength though, I could tell he admired it in me.

    What is this chemistry I am describing?

    I know there are other types that an Eight would like, but I am talking about this feeling of them being my absolute, exact other half. Like we were puzzle pieces who found each other.

    There are other types that I could sort of like, but I would never have this full-blown chemistry unless Eight is somewhere in their type. I feel like we are the ultimate power couple together.

  2. #2
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    4's and 2's. Sometimes 5's.

  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by DJ Arendee View Post
    4's and 2's. Sometimes 5's.
    How do you feel about Nines? When you think of a power type you want in your SO's personality, which power type is it? Or do you not think about that category?

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by Newbyagain View Post
    How do you feel about Nines? When you think of a power type you want in your SO's personality, which power type is it? Or do you not think about that category?
    9's are cursed with an inability to introspect or explain why they like things, and often times don't know why they're still dating you when feelings have run dry. As an Sx dom, I want to be able to predict and understand my partner on a very deep level, and this is made difficult with the E9's lack of introspection.

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by DJ Arendee View Post
    9's are cursed with an inability to introspect or explain why they like things, and often times don't know why they're still dating you when feelings have run dry. As an Sx dom, I want to be able to predict and understand my partner on a very deep level, and this is made difficult with the E9's lack of introspection.
    Thanks for explaining that. The compatibility chart for types on that big named website makes it sounds like Eights and Nines have a strong chemistry, but I can't say I'm sold. I thought because it seems like Nines are just not as responsive as an Eight would like, but maybe Eights tune in on the quiet strength of Nines in ways that most other types can't... I don't know. Do you think maybe that is Five in you that wants that introspection?

    Here is the chart I was talking about. Can you tell me if you relate to this explanation or the author has painted an honest picture of it? It makes it sound like there is a strong chemistry, but I'm still questioning it.

  6. #6
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    give me someone colder and less emotional ANY day as opposed to someone who's going to go all dramatic on me... ugh, I really won't deal with drama anymore

    I'm happy with my 6/1 and have been for around 5 years or so... it's like coming home to PEACE after being out in the world and being myself. There's something that's way underestimated about how nice that feels
    “Oh, we're always alright. You remember that. We happen to other people.” -Terry Pratchett

  7. #7
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    I don't think its my inner 5, I think its my Sx.

    When I ask someone, "why do you like that kind of music" and they say "Idunno" it doesn't help conversation very much.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by DJ Arendee View Post
    I don't think its my inner 5, I think its my Sx.

    When I ask someone, "why do you like that kind of music" and they say "Idunno" it doesn't help conversation very much.
    I see what you were saying. I suspected that's what you meant. Don't you have some youtube videos? Would you mind if I looked at them to get a better idea of you? And yes, I know where you are coming from. I don't feel like I can connect with someone who responds with "sure," " I don't know," "we'll see." I like for someone to say "let's go for a ride," and "I know where you are coming from."

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by whatever View Post
    give me someone colder and less emotional ANY day as opposed to someone who's going to go all dramatic on me... ugh, I really won't deal with drama anymore

    I'm happy with my 6/1 and have been for around 5 years or so... it's like coming home to PEACE after being out in the world and being myself. There's something that's way underestimated about how nice that feels

    That's interesting to hear that. I almost dated a Six, but I couldn't follow through with it. I felt like he had a lot for me, but mostly I wouldn't be able to grow much from him. I don't think I could have fallen head over heals, intense love.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Newbyagain View Post
    I see what you were saying. I suspected that's what you meant. Don't you have some youtube videos? Would you mind if I looked at them to get a better idea of you? And yes, I know where you are coming from. I don't feel like I can connect with someone who responds with "sure," " I don't know," "we'll see." I like for someone to say "let's go for a ride," and "I know where you are coming from."
    check out EJArendee on youtube.

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