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[Type 4] E4's running circles around me.

Azure Flame

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So I'll have over 5 E4's hitting on me at once. Super flirty. The more I ignore the more they talk to me.

Then when I talk to one it runs away while the others flirt with me even harder. So I talk to those and then they run away and the originals come back.

This is why I'm still single.

I feel like a scuba diver trying to catch a fish with his hands as they circle him.

Am I doing something wrong? I feel like I'm doing something wrong.

I could date regular women... but those are just get so... boring?
 

chickpea

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Maybe they can sense that you're trying to get with 4 other girls at the same time.
 

Azure Flame

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if that were true wouldn't they have given up on me to begin with?
 

Standuble

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I would think that they let themselves get carried away in the passion for a time and then realised that a relationship with you would not solve any outstanding issues they have in their lives. If they do not feel that the relationship is authentic enough or it is not a panacea for whichever reason they feel broken then they will turn away from you. It's probably not that they're playing games; they were just delayed when trying to reach their destination.
 

Amargith

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Nope. We can be rather competitive :devil:

In all earnest though, I would run too. It's a way to let the guy give chase - and force him to make up his mind on what he wants, while giving yourself some more space to test and see if he is just grabbing you for convenience or actually wants it bad enough to abandon other girls and go for you :coffee:

I dont particularly care for being a convenience prize, I tend to look for the real thing. It tends to make me feel generic and interchangeable...the last thing a 4 wants to feel. As flirty as I may be with you - and boy, do I enjoy banter and flirting, as well as your company - and might even consider you for more, I aint about to give into you when youve got 5 other girls turning your head and being an opportunistic hunter. You're not serious about me, I'm not serious about you. Sorry.
 

Standuble

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My advice mate is to give up this type four chasing. You probably don't have what it takes. Couldn't you go for a seven or another eight? I am sure the constant infighting and struggle for control would be exciting in its own way. If not seek out an older four, after apathy sets in they would be more willing to accept a relationship because they have stopped caring about their dreams and what their heart wants.

So there may still be hope for you.
 

Standuble

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My advice mate is to give up this type four chasing. You probably don't have what it takes. Couldn't you go for a seven or another eight? I am sure the constant infighting and struggle for control would be exciting in its own way. If not seek out an older four, after apathy sets in they would be more willing to accept a relationship because they have stopped caring about their dreams and what their heart wants.

So there may still be hope for you.
 

small.wonder

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My first question is how do you know so many fours? Just because they are dramatic and anxty does not mean they are 4's. Heck, I only know one other than myself IRL. Plus, I'd never group-flirt the way you are describing either-- it's actually the false, bimbo-ish type of thing I despise.

I also think you still have an issue with not choosing mature/healthy people. I almost think that the "thing" that causes you to assume that these girls are type 4 is an immature trait, not a mature one. It's almost like you think, "this girl drives me crazy, so she's a four", when in reality she could just be a damaged, immature person of any type. So what is that "thing" that makes you think they are 4's?
 

OrangeAppled

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I think you type a bunch of e2 ENFJs as e4 INFJs (or just a wrong typing altogether). The integrate at 2 & may have stereotypical (albeit not necessarily true) 4ish personas going on (arty, dramatic, specialness complexes, etc).

Unless your idea of flirting is very different from mine. Or maybe they have a major 3 wing, but I've still never met a 4 like that. 4s are more melancholy, withdrawn, self-defeating - not aggressive & competitive flirts.
 

Azure Flame

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oh, they never know about each other, nor are they competitive. Its 1 on 1 with me. But from my point of view they're unwittingly competing. I think they pick up on when I lose focus on them and that's when they press closer.

um, yeah I'm meeting a lot of F'd up people. Usually they make the first move. Whenever I make the first move I don't encounter this issue.
 
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