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  1. #11

  2. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Typh0n View Post
    In my teens I behaved like a total ass. It annoyed the hell out of people, and now, Im well behaved for the most part, but I see these kids in the street or public transportation behaving like animals, and it annoyes the crap out of me. I think the problem has nothing to do with these kids inner motivations, its just that noone ever tells them theyre a nuisance, their parents, their teachers, the cops etc do nothing and thats the gist of the problem.
    I actually didn't realize I was so obnoxious until I had an enfp explain to me, "you are completely ruining the tranquility of this chatroom and its abrasive and obnoxious." After that I was like, "... oh... very well I'll stop then."

    Ok so I guess the gentleness they're describing is, the ability to control yourself and moderate when given the chance to use excessive force. I also wonder if this has sexual importance as well. The ability to hold myself back and control myself is sexier than showing no control whatsoever.

    In otherwords, the second I start yelling and screaming is the second I've lost.

    I've recently inverted my approach to teaching the boys. I used to micromanage and tell each kid directly that what they were doing was wrong and they need to sit down etc. I've now realized they are all constantly competing for my attention, so when I say "I like how guss is sitting" they all immediately go down and sit down next to guss.


    But I don't think this is relevant to being an 8. I think E8 has more to do with, "I could scream at you right now but I choose not to."

  3. #13
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    Think of a stallion cooperating with his rider, instead of obstinately refusing to be saddled at all. The amount of showing off, power, beauty and elegance coming off of them when they put their mind to doing the work is...



    Very different from their belligerence

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  4. #14
    nee andante bechimo's Avatar
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    Firstly, gauge by individual kid. Use MBTI. If they're STPs, they'll probably respond to your form of abuse.

  5. #15
    i love skylights's Avatar
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    Maybe the greatest manifestation of power is having the ability and the will not to use it.

  6. #16
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    ^

    ★ڿڰۣ✿ℒoѵℯ✿ڿڰۣ★





    "Harm none, do as ye will”

  7. #17
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    this thread is making me wanna barf

  8. #18
    Senior Member Entropic's Avatar
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    Learning to allow yourself to be vulnerable. It's that simple when it comes to type 8. The gentleness comes from that 8s deny their own sense of vulnerability, because deep down they feel very sensitive so they project this externally. This is innocence. The gentleness is shown when the 8 bothers to care about others because they see innocence that needs to be protected.

    I for example think this is well-represented as a theme in the first Alien film where Ellen Ripley has to take the cat with her despite it possibly risking her own survival. The cat's just innocent and it doesn't deserve to die. Life's so cruel, she can't let it happen.

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  9. #19
    Member CheshireCat's Avatar
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    I have an SJ and an SP, 5 and 6 years old. I've noticed, for the SP the best incentive for him is depravation. Taking away what he desires. In your case it is your attention/ approval. In school they use a behavior clip chart that seems of utmost importance to the kids >.> I've seen a boy crying because he had to move his clip from a green smiley face to a yellow one. How old are the kids you work with? .... My SJ is more often a non-issue... I found it helpful to read the descriptions of childhood patterns for MBTI types out of the book Please Understand me II.

    You could always offer some sort of reward for exceptional pupils... Kids tend to be.... always requiring a lot of direction/ redirection. Have you considered an assistant?

  10. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by CheshireCat View Post
    I have an SJ and an SP, 5 and 6 years old. I've noticed, for the SP the best incentive for him is depravation. Taking away what he desires.

    That is exactly how I was disciplined, and it drove me NUTS.

    I would agree that works like a charm.

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