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  1. #11
    i love skylights's Avatar
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    Jul 2010
    MBTI
    INFP
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    6w7 so/sx
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    EII Ne
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    6w7 629 sx/so ENFP

    My self-doubt manifests as questioning my ability to make good decisions for myself. It's rooted in fear that I will make a bad decision that will have long-lasting negative effects in my life. Inside, I feel like I don't have any grounding, like I'm torn one way and then the other, and like I'm awash in a sea of information without any good direction posts. Outside, I express ambiguity, and I lean one way and then the other without ever committing. I procrastinate until either a choice is made for me or the opportunity is gone.

    Self-doubt is not trusting myself to be competent at creating a good life for myself. "Self" is the part of me that idealizes and thinks that it knows what will make me happy, but is not always right! Leaning on my Fi sense of what is important and meaningful, as well as what I am drawn to, is usually the best way for me to make a decision. I also have to just take a leap of faith and trust that I can make the best of whatever I choose.

  2. #12
    Member Asterism's Avatar
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    Jul 2012
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    4w5 sx/sp
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    Type 4w5 sp/sx, Ni-dominant. The jury is still out on which one.

    How do you experience self-doubt?

    A crippling sense of defectiveness and inferiority.

    What causes it?

    Sometimes it comes out of nowhere, but often when I examine the progress and results of my life, or what I've done so far, and find it lacking. There's an idealized self-generated image of me that I'm always striving to become, and falling short of that is the usual trigger for self-doubt.

    What do you feel inside? What do you do or show on the outside?

    Intense self-hatred, followed by a feeling of hollowness or emptiness, and like I'm blurring around the edges. On the outside, I'll either be intensely moody (more than usual) or I'll show nothing. Flattened affect and, so I've been told, a "drifting" quality. It's like I try to disappear, and I've noticed it's during these periods that my interpersonal relationships become most tumultuous, as I look for reasons to nigh-literally vanish from my friends' lives.

    What is self-doubt to you?

    When I feel incapable of doing or being what I want due to some kind of core deficiency that isn't easily fixed (or can't be fixed) or compensated for. It's something I've always struggled with.

    What is "self" to you?

    Merely what defines me, apart from others and our contexts. What stays the same even when everything else changes.

    I think that I have a rather unstable identity, but I've always maintained a consistent awareness of "self." At the core of my being, there is something fixed and unyielding. Unfortunately, I have a lot of problems manifesting that in reality (hence the unstable identity; I'm defining that as the sum of self that I present to others) and I often feel fake and contrived and "forced," since it's so difficult to show something so abstract on the outside and present it in a way that the message is clear. I vasillate between wanting others to get the message and coding it so that they don't because I've yet to deem them worthy of knowing me that intimately.

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