I'm a bottled up coke that's been shaken until dangerous. I have too much energy. I need to expend it. I NEED TO YELL AT PEOPLE. I NEED TO BLAST PENDULUM.
I go to work and all these motherfuckers are like, "we like to share our time with the children and learn with them" while I'm like, "I Push kids as hard as they can while still enjoying what they do!"
I like to harass people and tell them they're a fucking coke mongrel pen licker with their ass WEDGED IN A FURNACE.
I CAN'T YELL EVER. I'M SURROUNDED BY QUIET PEOPLE ALL THE TIME. WHY IS EVERYONE SO FUCKING QUIET? I FEEL LIKE I'M IN A FUCKING CAGE ALL THE TIME.
WHY DO I FEEL LIKE A BULLY WHEN I GET ENTHUSIASTIC? WHY DO PEOPLE DO WHAT I SAY AND ACT SUBMISSIVE? IT MAKES ME FEEL LIKE I'M THEIR FUCKING OVERLORD.
I'M NOT YOUR BOSS, I'M TRYING TO BE YOUR FRIEND
HYYTYAOIF:AIFHIPOHEWQINC:OWQMCLKDOA:IWD PBOAIHS POV@!))!(*_)!@*))(V@!)*(#*)U
Is there a psychological reason for this so I can better understand why I'm like this and setup my life in a way that is indicative of this? or am I just FUCKED?
I'm 25 years old and have no money. I work as a gymnastics instructor, where I THOUGHT my intensity would be great for the job, but even then I'm the loudest person in the room while they play classical music and practically whisper to each other. I feel like I'd be "destroying the calm atmosphere" which is what I do everywhere I fucking go and everyone has to remind me that. I hate Si. ISFP Girlfriend turns me into a quiet sheep when I'm around her. I love her to death but I'm scared I'll just make her shit herself or something.
Any advice? Can anyone relate?