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  1. #51
    Iron Maiden fidelia's Avatar
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    Where's all the 8 anger come from? Do they just respond differently to the same events because they are wired differently or is it that they attract/are drawn to stuff that angers them because of interaction style etc? Seems to be a pretty standard mode. Is it a way of ensuring that things get done?

    For me, I find that anger actually inhibits me from getting on with the solution to the problem. I find anger itself very distracting as I have to figure out where it is coming from, whether my feelings and response are reasonable, lasting/transient and then pick a course of action to deal with the anger before I can get on with the problem solving.

    However, I've noticed that some type 8s actually use it as a motivating factor to take action so they can feel better and it has a kind of propelling effect.

  2. #52
    Bunnies & Rainbow Socks Kayness's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by YWIR View Post
    I'm a very angry person. It just eats at me. I constantly feel like breaking something or someone, and when there is reason to make it worse, I get so angry that I start tearing up from rage. It's really annoying.
    I've had moments like that.
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  3. #53
    this is my winter song EJCC's Avatar
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    If anger is a scale between mildly annoyed and HULK SMASH, then I'm on that scale all the time. It's probably there, simmering, even when I don't notice it.

    I try not to let it out unless it's justified, because when I do let it out, I get a very negative and/or awkward reaction from people around: either they're too bewildered to act, or they think I'm overreacting and are judging me for it. Also, if you're in the middle of a crisis, venting will not help you, but channeling your anger into solving the problem probably will help you -- as long as you keep a leash on it and don't let it out of your sight.

    In other words...
    Quote Originally Posted by DiscoBiscuit View Post
    It's like an ocean of lava under a stone floor.

    Yea it keeps the house warm, but it could also destroy the neighborhood.
    ^ This.

    What's the line from X-Men: First Class? Something like, "True focus lies somewhere between rage and serenity"?

    Edit:
    Quote Originally Posted by fidelia View Post
    For me, I find that anger actually inhibits me from getting on with the solution to the problem. I find anger itself very distracting as I have to figure out where it is coming from, whether my feelings and response are reasonable, lasting/transient and then pick a course of action to deal with the anger before I can get on with the problem solving.
    Interesting. I actually relate more to the ENTJ Eights than I do to this, as a 1w2 (like you). Maybe it has something to do with MBTI? I've found that regardless of Enneagram, Te dominant/secondary people are much more accepting of anger than Fe dominant/secondary people are -- whereas the Te folks aren't as accepting of sadness as Fe folks. (If the emotion in question was sadness, I'd be doing literally the exact same thing you're describing: analyzing it and trying to figure out why it's there, so I can get rid of it -- and withdrawing into myself until the internal problem is solved.)
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  4. #54
    Senior Member ms.behaving's Avatar
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    My anger is like the "quiet game" where the important part is to keep from laughing.
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  5. #55
    Iron Maiden fidelia's Avatar
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    EJCC - That's a really interesting observation. It had never occurred to me before, but that seems bang on. I don't enjoy wallowing in sadness, but neither am I in a hurry to get it dealt with in the same way I am with anger. I would say that's the emotion that is more likely to be around all the time in some form. I'm not sure if all Fe dominant/aux people are like that, but I know my ENFJ mother is too.

  6. #56
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  7. #57
    Member Savitri's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    If anger is a scale between mildly annoyed and HULK SMASH, then I'm on that scale all the time. It's probably there, simmering, even when I don't notice it.

    I try not to let it out unless it's justified, because when I do let it out, I get a very negative and/or awkward reaction from people around: either they're too bewildered to act, or they think I'm overreacting and are judging me for it. Also, if you're in the middle of a crisis, venting will not help you, but channeling your anger into solving the problem probably will help you -- as long as you keep a leash on it and don't let it out of your sight.

    I hear that from type 1 Te-users a lot. Heck, I'm the same, anger beats wallowing in sadness. Sadness increases my anger and makes me focus. lol

    I want to ask, do some people perceive "mildly annoyed" as anger from your experience?
    LIE-Ni * SCOEI * Te/Fi * 1-7-3 The Systems Builder

  8. #58
    this is my winter song EJCC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fidelia View Post
    EJCC - That's a really interesting observation. It had never occurred to me before, but that seems bang on. I don't enjoy wallowing in sadness, but neither am I in a hurry to get it dealt with in the same way I am with anger. I would say that's the emotion that is more likely to be around all the time in some form. I'm not sure if all Fe dominant/aux people are like that, but I know my ENFJ mother is too.
    Huh. That's a little bit contrary to what my understanding of Ones had been.
    Do you think you're often angry/irritated, but just don't validate it like Te-using Ones do? Maybe in a sense, you repress it even more?
    Quote Originally Posted by DiscoBiscuit View Post
    Dammit I keep relating perfectly to everything you post!

    Maybe I need to revoke my 1 membership.
    Quote Originally Posted by Savitri View Post
    I hear that from type 1 Te-users a lot. Heck, I'm the same, anger beats wallowing in sadness. Sadness increases my anger and makes me focus. lol
    Sadness just makes me want to sit around and wallow in self-pity. But anger? Anger is the fire under my ass, when something needs to get done.
    I want to ask, do some people perceive "mildly annoyed" as anger from your experience?
    Sometimes I misinterpret my own anger as being annoyance, and other people end up reading my own anger better than I do. But yeah, I think sometimes they do react that way -- because when I'm mildly annoyed about something, I tend to flamboyantly complain about it as a conversation starter, comic relief, and a good story to tell. But if you didn't know me, you might think that I was easily angered by very small things, when, in truth, the angrier I am about something, the less likely I am to talk about it.

    Edit: My moments of expressing my anger are usually very short -- and I've noticed that after those outbursts, people around me (even friends!) watch me warily, because they didn't see the outburst coming initially, so they don't know when the next one will show up, if it will at all. (Maybe this is just with my NFJ friends; they're so used to being able to perfectly read people that when people throw them off, they get confused. )
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    EJCC: "The Big Questions in my life right now: 1) What am I willing to live with? 2) What do I have to live with? 3) What can I change for the better?"
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  9. #59
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    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    Dammit I keep relating perfectly to everything you post!
    I think that's kind of the way we are (gut centers). Our anger with the state of the world and others in it fuels our desire to make a better one.

  10. #60
    this is my winter song EJCC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DiscoBiscuit View Post
    I think that's kind of the way we are (gut centers). Our anger with the state of the world and others in it fuels our desire to make a better one.
    Indeed.

    +1
    ~ g e t f e s t i v e ! ~


    EJCC: "The Big Questions in my life right now: 1) What am I willing to live with? 2) What do I have to live with? 3) What can I change for the better?"
    Coriolis: "Is that the ESTJ Serenity Prayer?"



    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
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