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Thread: Comforting 6s?

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    Question Comforting 6s?

    6s, how do you prefer to be treated/comforted when overwhelmed by negative emotion? When you make an emotion-related problem aware to another, what kind of response do you hope for? What is the worst thing someone can do when you are in distress?

    (Bonus question, if you're interested: how do you go about comforting others when you see them in distress?)

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    My dad is type 6, he's very hard working person, I rarely see him angry though, I tend to get along very well with my dad. Just don't provoke them, they likes when everyone is cheerful and obey the rules.

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    It just goes away. I don't seek comfort in anything, I don't believe. I just carry my shame like a weight until my strength assimilates it into part of me.

    The worst thing someone could probably do is insult my character. I have a deep seeded desire to be liked, and I think more importantly (yet less obtainable), respected. 'Cause I do my best to like and respect my fellow peers.

    I usually give them something that signifies value, or worth - maybe lunch or something. I'm not very good at emotional consolement.

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    So if you don't seek out comfort and keep things to yourself, how do you react when someone tries to offer comfort?

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    Quote Originally Posted by thistle View Post
    6s, how do you prefer to be treated/comforted when overwhelmed by negative emotion? When you make an emotion-related problem aware to another, what kind of response do you hope for? What is the worst thing someone can do when you are in distress?

    (Bonus question, if you're interested: how do you go about comforting others when you see them in distress?)
    I like for them to let me express my feelings and thoughts without imposing any negative judgments. Mostly, I want to be acknowledged and felt heard no matter how irrational I may be in the moment.

    On the bonus question: I tend to be alert to others who are in distress. I prod them into talking about what's bothering them and try to be encouraging.

    Please provide feedback on my Nohari and Johari Window by clicking here: Nohari/Johari

    Tri-type 639

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    Quote Originally Posted by thistle View Post
    So if you don't seek out comfort and keep things to yourself, how do you react when someone tries to offer comfort?

    It'd be contextual, but I'd presume most reactions would be along the lines of acting. I would act as if what were being done/said was consoling me, even though inside i would know my mind still has a lot of thinking to be done.

    Which actually makes me realize talking something out is the ultimate stress relief for my brain.

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    I don't really let on to other people when I need help, though ironically I do feel let down when other people can't pick up that I need a hand. I just appreciate being noticed, and if the offer is made, that's appreciated. I usually like to handle my own business.

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    It depends on what I'm stressed out about and who you are. If you're a casual friend or acquaintence, I want to be given space and left alone. If we are close, I like hugs, especially if I'm not so angry I want to spit nails, and in that case, also let me alone and then hug me when I calm down maybe.

    I really like when someone can reason with me in a broad-minded way. I don't mean reason with me like "this is silly, calm down" because the broad minded part is also important, like actually logically or socially explaining to me why it will be okay, because if I am in anxiety, it may be because I am afraid there is no way out.

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    Quote Originally Posted by highlander View Post
    I like for them to let me express my feelings and thoughts without imposing any negative judgments. Mostly, I want to be acknowledged and felt heard no matter how irrational I may be in the moment.

    On the bonus question: I tend to be alert to others who are in distress. I prod them into talking about what's bothering them and try to be encouraging.
    Yes I appreciate being allowed to vent without being judged. You can often your opinion later when I'm calm.

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    Quote Originally Posted by thistle
    6s, how do you prefer to be treated/comforted when overwhelmed by negative emotion?
    In general, I prefer others not to know. I try to seek quiet havens when I am emotionally overwhelmed and I generally only look to my closest confidante or two for support.

    When you make an emotion-related problem aware to another, what kind of response do you hope for?
    I would like for them to listen to me without judgment until I describe the whole problem, and then help me look at things in a way that eases my emotions. My boyfriend is a 9w1 and excellent at situation defusing, for instance. He is very good at framing issues in a clear and simple light and bringing my stress level way down.

    What is the worst thing someone can do when you are in distress?
    Insult my emotional state. I know it's bad already; it is useless information and only serves to make me feel worse about myself on top of whatever negativity I'm already feeling.

    (Bonus question, if you're interested: how do you go about comforting others when you see them in distress?)
    I generally try to approach them gently and in a non-intrusive manner, and ask them if and how I can help them. If I know them well enough to understand a more efficient way of helping them, I will expedite.

    Quote Originally Posted by Trunks View Post
    Just don't provoke them, they likes when everyone is cheerful and obey the rules.
    Personal clarification - as a 6, I don't really care if everyone follows the rules. It just pisses me off when people break the rules stupidly. I think that if one is going to break them, they ought to understand exactly what they're doing, why they're doing it, and how it's going to impact everyone else. If they're putting undue burden on others, then they shouldn't be breaking them until they figure out a way to alleviate that.

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