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Thread: 4s & gender

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    Senior Member FunnyDigestion's Avatar
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    Question 4s & gender

    Or gender "roles", if you think life is like a performance.

    First question: isn't life like a performance??

    But, I think 5s are the least gender-particular Enneagram type. All 5s are kinda the same, in their behavior. 4s are more mysterious, usually they have some androgynous feature that's hard to put your finger on. Like women 4s usually have a cold, hardass element that seems out of place, while male 4s usually have a gentle, sympathetic element that seems out of place... even though ultimately male & female 4s are probably mostly the same.

    What do you think? Are 4s the most androgynous type?
    Last edited by FunnyDigestion; 11-12-2011 at 01:29 AM. Reason: ..
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    RETIRED CzeCze's Avatar
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    You're welcome



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    ps I just happened to stumble onto your thread because but in the future you can report post your OP and request the thread be moved.
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    Quote Originally Posted by FunnyDigestion View Post
    MOVE TO ENNEAGRAM FORUM

    Or gender "roles", if you think life is like a performance.

    First question: isn't life like a performance??

    But, I think 5s are the least gender-particular Enneagram type. All 5s are kinda the same, in their behavior. 4s are more mysterious, usually they have some androgynous feature that's hard to put your finger on. Like women 4s usually have a cold, hardass element that seems out of place, while male 4s usually have a gentle, sympathetic element that seems out of place... even though ultimately male & female 4s are probably mostly the same.

    What do you think? Are 4s the most androgynous type?
    I dunno. I think you were more correct with Fives. Because we're detached by nature, hence we tend not to gender-identify or fit into prescribed gender behavior.

    Fours, I typically scan as female regardless of true gender.
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    4s I see as more feminine and 5s more masculine.

    4s have the deep emotional expressiveness going on which I equate with "feminine" and 5s have the detached, aloof nature thing going on which I equate with being a bit more "masculine".

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    Senior Member FunnyDigestion's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jennifer View Post
    I dunno. I think you were more correct with Fives. Because we're detached by nature, hence we tend not to gender-identify or fit into prescribed gender behavior.

    Fours, I typically scan as female regardless of true gender.
    Lol... that's a good point, people in the chat always thought I was a girl for some reason... they say 4s are the creative type, & I tend to think creativity is related to femininity-- or maybe androgyny, since creative people regardless of gender tend to have higher sex drive.

    I always tell people I'm basically a girl deep down, & the only reason I can do anything is by acting... & if I weren't a good actor I probably would have been murdered by the real men a long time ago... but then something always happens to make me realize, "Wow, I'm really just a typical guy... damn".

    I wonder if it's the same for female 4s-- they feel cold, bitchy, more like men than women until something emotional happens & they're like, "Oh fuck I really am a woman.... shit"... perhaps. I think it's possible female 4s know more of the truth of life than any other people... perhaps.
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    Quote Originally Posted by FunnyDigestion View Post
    I always tell people I'm basically a girl deep down, & the only reason I can do anything is by acting... & if I weren't a good actor I probably would have been murdered by the real men a long time ago... but then something always happens to make me realize, "Wow, I'm really just a typical guy... damn".
    I didn't know you were a guy

    I wonder if it's the same for female 4s-- they feel cold, bitchy, more like men than women until something emotional happens & they're like, "Oh fuck I really am a woman.... shit"... perhaps. I think it's possible female 4s know more of the truth of life than any other people... perhaps.
    I'm a female 4 and normally I feel like a normal person, but occasionally I get overwhelmed by my emotions and I think "Oh crap I'm so weird and no one will ever understand me"
    4w5 sp/sx EII

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    Senior Member FunnyDigestion's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by 21% View Post
    I didn't know you were a guy


    I'm a female 4 and normally I feel like a normal person, but occasionally I get overwhelmed by my emotions and I think "Oh crap I'm so weird and no one will ever understand me"
    1- F U !!!!!! J/K

    2 - You're not that weird... I understand. Being alive is weird.
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    You have a choice! 21%'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by FunnyDigestion View Post
    2 - You're not that weird... I understand. Being alive is weird.
    The weird thing about this is... I actually like it that I'm weird and that no one will ever understand me
    4w5 sp/sx EII

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    Senior Member FunnyDigestion's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by 21% View Post
    The weird thing about this is... I actually like it that I'm weird and that no one will ever understand me
    To an extent, you're right.... but I find that even I can't understand myself, when I look back at how I was a few years previous... like when I read back on something I wrote when I was 21, 22, I think "WTF am I talking about"... so maybe understanding isn't that important-- or not as important as people like you & me tend to think.
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    Quote Originally Posted by FunnyDigestion View Post
    To an extent, you're right.... but I find that even I can't understand myself, when I look back at how I was a few years previous... like when I read back on something I wrote when I was 21, 22, I think "WTF am I talking about"... so maybe understanding isn't that important-- or not as important as people like you & me tend to think.
    When I read my old journal entries I just tend to crack up

    I feel that I long to be understood, but at the same time I feel scared that if I could ever be totally understood at all, that would mean I was 'normal' and 'fixable' after all, and I don't know if I want that... not sure if this would make sense to anyone
    4w5 sp/sx EII

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