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  1. #1
    Senior Member Chloe's Avatar
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    Lightbulb Threes and problem with being overly ambitious?!

    Do you guys have this problem?

    I just took college entrance exams, and out of 1800 people who applied I was first with 851 points, 2nd was 817, then all under 800.
    My initial plan was to have 920 points so I pretty much failed Not to mention that one part of tests (851 is all together,6-7 tests) I was only among top 15% which really disturbed me

    In some other scenarios if I did worse I wouldnt even open a thread because I would just try to forget the whole failure thing and focus on next chance to proe myself.

    Thing is, I know this isnt very normal. I get absolutely frustrated when I cant feel best in something I've put my mind into. :/


    Other issue is that I have periods of huge ambitions combined with periods of totally being flat about success because it is too much work and there are more imp things; which is very bad combination IMO because you cant set your priorities

    and i absolutely manage to destroy most of things i have achieved in period of when i dont care or am too lazy

    Also, I am afraid of that day -hope it never happens- when I will figure out that I cant achieve at all what I planned and I will end up just average. Since i am getting older i am more aware of that scenario bc my career so far was disasterous because of i was changing my mind 100 times and didnt invest in 1 thing enough.
    If someone asked me couple years ago about success I would be absolutely sure I will make it, dont know is this typically 3 to have too much self/confidence sometimes, but I am able to black out all negative scenarios and just see how "i can do it"; it is powerful drive but obviously it is often far from reality; I am more and more aware that failure is very likely.

  2. #2
    Senior Member Nomenclature's Avatar
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    Oh my god.

    I recently got my new ACT scores back the other day. 32 composite out of 36, which is top 1%. I achieved my goal of 30 composite and 34 in any subject. The first time, I got 29 composite (top 6%) and 33 in science. Imagine how excited I was for a 3 point increase.

    There are few situations worse than having nothing to show for working my ass off, but I'm young and I don't think I'll run out of options any time soon. Not accepted into my dream college? Psh, sign up for an easier college and transfer after getting a degree and serving a year on the Peace Corps. Commited? Dedicated? Fuck, yes.

    I myself couldn't set my priorities for a while-- I'm good at pretty much everything I try, and I'm scattered as fuck. But this year, I realized that there really is nothing else that makes me tick the way physics does (except maybe sexology, but... :p), not to mention I can start working in a lab right away after graduating. I could work for NASA. I could work for the U.S. Navy. I could work for the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation. It's so versatile and has so much potential (certainly more than the other majors I was considering). I think that works for me.

    Other people call it ADHD. I just call it having heavily polarized motivation and excitement.
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  3. #3
    Senior Member Chloe's Avatar
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    haha.. "I could work for NASA. I could work for... etc." - I know this thinking pattern but I wonder how much it is distorted 3s way of thinking and not reality. This is what I was thinking when saying that 3s can be too self confident. Which is not completely bad - until you end up o your ass and figure you saw it all how u wanted to see it and not how it IS.

  4. #4
    Senior Member Nomenclature's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chloé View Post
    haha.. "I could work for NASA. I could work for... etc." - I know this thinking pattern but I wonder how much it is distorted 3s way of thinking and not reality. This is what I was thinking when saying that 3s can be too self confident. Which is not completely bad - until you end up o your ass and figure you saw it all how u wanted to see it and not how it IS.
    A couple research teams at my high school from this graduating year did get awards from the US Navy (one of the projects was something with snail slime as a medical adhesive) and I have connections with people who work in labs, sooooo... I have grounds to believe that it's doable from a pragmatic standpoint. I can name other cases in which I was fucked from the start but all too stubborn though.
    ISTP 3w2 SX/SO

  5. #5
    Senior Member Chloe's Avatar
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    so you say "failure is not an option" ?

    anyway, of course you can get the job, but you can be bad at it, or something, there are always millions of possibilities to fail...

  6. #6
    You have a choice! 21%'s Avatar
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    I have a feeling that you will identify hugely with your enneagram type when you are young, but as you grow up, you learn to become more balanced and accepting (including accepting yourself), and you sort of 'step' out of the box. I think healthy threes will slowly learn NOT be so success-driven once you get a bit older.

    I'm in my late twenties, and I remember that I felt soooo 4 when I when I was at uni. Now I feel like I'm 'settling down' in my personality and I like myself better this way
    4w5 sp/sx EII

  7. #7
    Certified Sausage Smoker Elfboy's Avatar
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    I don't think it's so much that 3s are too ambitious as much as ambitious about the wrong things. wanting to make $1,000,000 a year retire by age 45 is useful ambition; wanting to get 100% in every class you take is not
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  8. #8
    Senior Member Chloe's Avatar
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    Actually, I wanted to get 100% because first person gets scholarship - so it is. But still, I put too much into it

  9. #9
    The Eighth Colour Octarine's Avatar
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    Ambition without passion is impotent. When you are passionate about something, you are far less likely to be motivated by factors such as a fear of failure. But sustained passion requires commitment.

  10. #10
    Senior Member Chloe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Catbert View Post
    Ambition without passion is impotent..
    you described my problem in few words so well; i am crazy ambitious but have no susstained passion.

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