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  1. #41
    The Memes Justify the End EcK's Avatar
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    Intriguing question.
    I'm not an 8. I'm a 7w8. I do have some of the 'hard edge' of an 8 I guess.
    I can be very stubborn. I also am very unhappy if I'm 'under' someone without good reasons (ie: if I'm learning from that person and really benefiting from the relationship).

    If someone is my manager 'just because' (years on the job, or any other reason I don't see as valid) then I will either feel completely dissengaged from my job or strive to get 'out' of this vertical relationships.

    I did that in a number of ways so far:
    - working hard and getting promoted several times in a record time.
    - pushing to get 'my own way' ie: I work like I want to work and 'pay' for it with increased output.
    - setting up my own business (a bit ironically I was conned out of it by a sociopathic e8 entj)
    - etc
    Expression of the post modern paradox : "For the love of god, religions are so full of shit"

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  2. #42
    failure to thrive AphroditeGoneAwry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ceecee View Post
    This is exactly why I seek out other 8's or people who I think could be 8's. They will be there all the way, 100% when they're needed. And people do need 8's to lean on and on the other side of the coin, 8's are going to protect the vulnerable. Not that this can't present issues in itself.

    Sometimes we see cough9'scough people who we feel may not be able to handle things as well as we can. So we step in. To help them. To save them pain. And what do we get for our trouble?

    Stop emasculating me!!!! I can handle it!!!

    Yeah? Then why are you trying to slit your wrists with that butter knife?

    I'm kidding. Kinda. But I love them anyway.
    I am there, 100% all the way, when I am needed.

    I don't think 8's have the corner on the reliability market.

    But I may be wrong.
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  3. #43
    mercenary SiegfriedSchtauffen's Avatar
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    What do you mean on "hard" and what is the opposite? Light? That would be boring for me . I think having 8 edges can be really good. Having ambitions and being able to effortlessly confront and defend yourself when necessary is actually golden in many areas of life.
    Health, Freedom, Fun.

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  4. #44
    Emperor/Dictator kyuuei's Avatar
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    In comparison to some lives... Though, to be fair, we do it to ourselves.
    Kantgirl: Just say "I'm feminine and I'll punch anyone who says otherwise!"
    Halla74: Think your way through the world. Feel your way through life.

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  5. #45
    my floof is luxury Wind Up Rex's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by kyuuei View Post
    In comparison to some lives... Though, to be fair, we do it to ourselves.
    I personally like to think we have more fun. I mean, be real, would you enjoy yourself as much if life wasn't just a little challenging? I get into the most trouble when things are too easy.

    I also think that resilience is something fundamental to the character of an 8. Experiences that would likely break other types are just kind of "an interesting thing that happened to us that one time". I don't think we know other way than slightly uphill. A bit against the grain. I honestly couldn't imagine my life any other way.
    And so long as you haven’t experienced this: to die and so to grow,
    you are only a troubled guest on the dark earth
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  6. #46
    Emperor/Dictator kyuuei's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wind Up Rex View Post
    I personally like to think we have more fun. I mean, be real, would you enjoy yourself as much if life wasn't just a little challenging? I get into the most trouble when things are too easy.

    I also think that resilience is something fundamental to the character of an 8. Experiences that would likely break other types are just kind of "an interesting thing that happened to us that one time". I don't think we know other way than slightly uphill. A bit against the grain. I honestly couldn't imagine my life any other way.
    Oh I whole heartedly agree. It bewilders me how people enjoy quiet routines and the daily grind. People ask me all the time if I actually like my position at work and it baffles me why people wouldn't take an extra $4 an hour to have more challenges and skill development.

    And I think it is because of resilience. There's something Dwarven about type 8s. We're built to be able to handle what we dish ourselves, because otherwise we'd just be awful implosive assholes.

    But there's a hint of loneliness there. Most people don't handle that well, so finding those able to support you is slim pickings. When the going gets tough, I find myself a little envious of those with a rock steady support group. I have a lifelong struggle of having a good support figure.
    Kantgirl: Just say "I'm feminine and I'll punch anyone who says otherwise!"
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  7. #47
    Triumph Hard's Avatar
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    I think living a "tough life" is indeed a hallmark of 8's, in particular when they seem to seek it out. Kyuuei and WUR explained it very well.

    That said, there is a similar pattern that can emerge with 1's, 3's, and to a certain extent 6's. They will tend to seek out a "tough life" as well, but their reasons for doing so are different. With 8's though, it's born of a desire to have something to push against. Without that it feels like something is sorely missing, and it can lead to self-created problems. Further, it acts as a sort of subconscious affirmation that they can handle anything thrown at them, and keeps them "trained" to handle other stuff. I wouldn't be suprised if some take it on for the sake of protecting others, and those they are close with. The world is a rough place, and instead of waiting for it to come to you, you go to it and take it on head on.
    MBTI: ExxJ tetramer
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  8. #48
    Senior Member
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    No matter who you are, you will have a hard life in some way or another.
    4w5-9w1-5w4

  9. #49
    not to be trusted miss fortune's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wind Up Rex View Post
    I personally like to think we have more fun. I mean, be real, would you enjoy yourself as much if life wasn't just a little challenging? I get into the most trouble when things are too easy.

    I also think that resilience is something fundamental to the character of an 8. Experiences that would likely break other types are just kind of "an interesting thing that happened to us that one time". I don't think we know other way than slightly uphill. A bit against the grain. I honestly couldn't imagine my life any other way.
    I had a boss once describe me as having a lot on common with his border collie... great whenever things were going on and there were problems to fix and someone needed to jump into the middle of things to sort them out... but if bored because nothing was going wrong, I would create extra work for myself by tearing things up and putting them back together in a different manner or would get in fights with people. If there's nothing challenging happening I get pretty bored

    Quote Originally Posted by kyuuei View Post
    Oh I whole heartedly agree. It bewilders me how people enjoy quiet routines and the daily grind. People ask me all the time if I actually like my position at work and it baffles me why people wouldn't take an extra $4 an hour to have more challenges and skill development.

    And I think it is because of resilience. There's something Dwarven about type 8s. We're built to be able to handle what we dish ourselves, because otherwise we'd just be awful implosive assholes.

    But there's a hint of loneliness there. Most people don't handle that well, so finding those able to support you is slim pickings. When the going gets tough, I find myself a little envious of those with a rock steady support group. I have a lifelong struggle of having a good support figure.
    I think that the resilience thing is, in part, why I AM so protective of my people... I know that I can handle a lot more than they can, so I'll put myself in the way because something that may be devastating to them is a lot less so to me. I don't even get paid extra to work in the toughest department at work... it's a choice because there's always something happening there and there are always new things to learn... most people seem to want an uneventful day in which they go through the routines and then go home. I can't understand that... why spend 40 hours a week being bored?

    and even admitting that I need support or help is pretty impossible in most circumstances

    Quote Originally Posted by Hard View Post
    I think living a "tough life" is indeed a hallmark of 8's, in particular when they seem to seek it out. Kyuuei and WUR explained it very well.

    That said, there is a similar pattern that can emerge with 1's, 3's, and to a certain extent 6's. They will tend to seek out a "tough life" as well, but their reasons for doing so are different. With 8's though, it's born of a desire to have something to push against. Without that it feels like something is sorely missing, and it can lead to self-created problems. Further, it acts as a sort of subconscious affirmation that they can handle anything thrown at them, and keeps them "trained" to handle other stuff. I wouldn't be suprised if some take it on for the sake of protecting others, and those they are close with. The world is a rough place, and instead of waiting for it to come to you, you go to it and take it on head on.
    you left out an important thing... some people don't feel ALIVE unless they have something to overcome. without something to fix life feels pointless
    “Oh, we're always alright. You remember that. We happen to other people.” -Terry Pratchett

  10. #50
    Butterfly Amargith's Avatar
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    The beauty of an 8




    Personally, I do think that each enneagram type has that same type of drive (and protectiveness) - just in a different field - and consequently, can make life just as hard for themselves in pursuing it.

    It's just the sheer physicality with which an 8 does this that is so...

    It gives new meaning to the phrase 'moving heaven and earth'
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