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[Other/Multiple Enneatypes] 3w4 vs 4w3

yoyo

New member
Joined
Oct 28, 2010
Messages
9
MBTI Type
xNxP
What are the differences between them? I can't really decide which I am - what are the main characteristics of each when compared with each other?
 

Santosha

New member
Joined
Feb 1, 2011
Messages
1,516
MBTI Type
HUMR
Enneagram
6
Instinctual Variant
sx
What are the differences between them? I can't really decide which I am - what are the main characteristics of each when compared with each other?

What I've read, (and I have no idea of the validity to this because I can't decipher if I'm 4w3 or 7) is that a 4w3 has deep emotion at there core. In times of distress, the 4w3 will feel like they MUST resolve the emotional conflict before they can carry on with work, school, etc. Theyre functionability is strongly affected.

A 3w4 can much more easily push their feeling aside to complete the task at hand.

This is true in my case, assuming I'm 4w3. For instance, If I get into a terrible fight with my SO, I will consider calling off work until it's resolved. It's very difficult for me to go to work and focus on the task without resolving this emotional conflict. I think a 3w4 could easily push the bad emotions aside to complete what they need to.

I've also read that 3's value status, image, accomplishments more than 4's, who value sincerity & depth.
 

Thalassa

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May 3, 2009
Messages
25,183
MBTI Type
ISFP
Enneagram
6w7
Instinctual Variant
sx
Yes, for this reason I insist I'm 4w3 vs. 3w4...although I apparently can appear 3, I believe this is the 4w3 performer showing a public/private self...I have a hard time functioning if a serious (especially romantic) relationship is at odds. Like I can go to work, but my hands will be shaking and I'll cry in the bathroom, and I'll have the 3 ability in some situations to "maintain the facade" (apparently to the point of looking FJ to people who just met me, and convincing someone I'm perfectly fine, when I'm very upset) ...but when it comes down to it, I can be hysterical, like crying in the floor, or emailing someone or calling them until I get some kind of resolution.

This is why I don't believe I could be a real 3. Apparently their emotional control is so "real" to them that they can even divorce themselves from their feeling center, it goes beyond just being able to convince others like a 4w3 can be capable of doing.
 

skylights

i love
Joined
Jul 6, 2010
Messages
7,756
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
6w7
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
^ i am there with you.

strange though, how that element of 3ness would seem to preclude any FPs from ever being 3s.

i relate more to 3 core issues but with the presence of deep emotion.

personally i am torn 3w? / 4w3 / 7w6
 

Thalassa

Permabanned
Joined
May 3, 2009
Messages
25,183
MBTI Type
ISFP
Enneagram
6w7
Instinctual Variant
sx
well aside from the emo, I also don't consider myself a "human doing"...I show many 3 traits, including feeling compelled to make straight As in college, and it even appears I've burnt out from school and disintegrated to some lethargic 9-ish state (which apparently 3s do) but those two major components lead me to believe I am still 4w3.

My tritype is 4w3 > 6w7 > 8w9
 

Erskine L. Cole

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Joined
Feb 27, 2011
Messages
9
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
4w3
I can function in the sense of working and doing other busy activities in spite of feelings, and I can usually even hide these feelings if I need to, but I do not detach from feelings to do the thinking/acting bit, i.e., to "work" in our cultural idiom. Threes require detachment from the Heart Center in order to think and act effectively; the idea of feeling is uncomfortable for Threes who are trying to function.

Even if Threes are not depressed or faced with the danger of emotion at the level of crisis, they will still require this detachment from their Heart Center in order to use the amalgam of their Head and Gut Centers. They fear that if they allow themselves to go into feeling mode to any extent when they're working, the feeling will incapacitate them. They might be able to dramatize emotions when they're working, but they cannot let themselves engage in emotional feeling and work at the same time.

As a Four, if I'm overwhelmed by a feeling, which is rare (my Tritype and instinctual stack, in addition to my wing, make me less depressive and more resilient than many Fours have described themselves as being), I need to work through the feeling before I'm functional again. If I'm bothered but not quite thrown into crisis by a feeling, I may be able to conceal this disturbance and function anyway, but the feeling stays with me, often in the forefront of my mind.

In short, I cannot detach from feelings as Threes do. I can either stop working, suffer a decrease in the ability to work, or hide the feeling and work anyway. Threes, on the other hand, not only can detach but must detach in order to work.
 
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