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  1. #11
    brainheart
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shades of X View Post
    That's fucked up, good for you for letting her have it. I don't think it's a good example of enneagram differences, though, because a lot of people's first impulse in that situation would probably be the same thing, regardless of type.
    You can say that, but everyone in the elevator (including my husband) was completely shocked by my behavior.

  2. #12
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    *raises hand*

    I might be one.
    ★ڿڰۣ✿ℒoѵℯ✿ڿڰۣ★





    "Harm none, do as ye will”

  3. #13

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    Quote Originally Posted by Satine View Post
    *raises hand*

    I might be one.
    Welcome to the club! :]

  4. #14
    Whisky Old & Women Young Speed Gavroche's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by unsung View Post
    Marlon Brando and Heath Ledger (?)
    Marlon Brando is a 8w9 Sx/Sp.

    4w5 Sx/So
    Yukio Mishima http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IasOkulcDQk
    Alanis Morissette http://www.charlierose.com/view/interview/3943
    Anne Sexton http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L4VlcVfgFJk
    Guru Dutt http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jf7xUZGJtKU
    Dylan Thomas(voice only) http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=NIoXV-HXobo
    EsTP 6w7 Sx/Sp

    Chaotic Neutral

    E=60% S=55% T=70% P=80%

    "I don't believe in guilt, I only believe in living on impulses"

    "Stereotypes about personality and gender turn out to be fairly accurate: ... On the binary Myers-Briggs measure, the thinking-feeling breakdown is about 30/70 for women versus 60/40 for men." ~ Bryan Caplan

  5. #15
    So she did. small.wonder's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by brainheart View Post
    You can say that, but everyone in the elevator (including my husband) was completely shocked by my behavior.
    Haha, I just found this and had to comment because I've totally done similar things. Afterwards, everyone just stares at me or tries to change the subject! My Mom would always scold me quietly but incredulously with just my name. I'm definitely less a ticking time bomb than I used to be, but I still tend to speak up in those moments.
    Find my Enneagram writing here. Also, I'd love for you to take my six question Enneagram surveyEnneagram survey!✨

  6. #16
    Paranoid Android Video's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by small.wonder View Post
    Haha, I just found this and had to comment because I've totally done similar things. Afterwards, everyone just stares at me or tries to change the subject! My Mom would always scold me quietly but incredulously with just my name. I'm definitely less a ticking time bomb than I used to be, but I still tend to speak up in those moments.
    This pushes the thread topic, but I've been wanting to ask this directly for a while.

    I am not sx, and would speak up this way to a very close, small core of people, but not express such outside of it. But for the record, I believe it's better to say something and dislike my inhibition - thus, in a healthier state, I might get over it.

    The point is that someone can have a social/intimate split in what and when they express themselves, or not have one so much (the time bomb goes off when it goes off). Can struggling with such a split or not be part of instinctual variant differences, or is it more likely due to some other functional difference or wing? If it's not a variant thing, what could it be? Is it even possible to be a type 4 if one is shy of some contexts and not others in this way?
    4w3 6w5 1w2 sx/sp ISFP

    RLOAX (don't do it)
    Melancholic Hufflepuff
    A lonely island where only what is permitted to move moves, becomes an ideal. Jung

    Kiss Kiss [johari] Bang Bang [nohari]

  7. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nixie View Post
    This pushes the thread topic, but I've been wanting to ask this directly for a while.

    I am not sx, and would speak up this way to a very close, small core of people, but not express such outside of it. But for the record, I believe it's better to say something and dislike my inhibition - thus, in a healthier state, I might get over it.

    The point is that someone can have a social/intimate split in what and when they express themselves, or not have one so much (the time bomb goes off when it goes off). Can struggling with such a split or not be part of instinctual variant differences, or is it more likely due to some other functional difference or wing? If it's not a variant thing, what could it be? Is it even possible to be a type 4 if one is shy of some contexts and not others in this way?
    Generalised anxiety is a 6 trait, not a 4 trait. I would be suspicious of a 4 who complained about being generally shy (as opposed to socially, and any situations associated with a past trauma).

    I also find it hard to envision how some with an sx/so/sp stacking could be sufficiently withdrawn to exhibit core 4w5 traits, as opposed to a fix, and would assume that they have mistaken either their Enneatype or stacking. 5, like 4, is a withdrawn type, which kind of weighs against the probably of sp last. Your sx/so 4 (still a rare beast, lol) would be a 4w3 with a strong 7 or 8 fix.

  8. #18
    So she did. small.wonder's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kullervo View Post
    I also find it hard to envision how some with an sx/so/sp stacking could be sufficiently withdrawn to exhibit core 4w5 traits, as opposed to a fix, and would assume that they have mistaken either their Enneatype or stacking. 5, like 4, is a withdrawn type, which kind of weighs against the probably of sp last. Your sx/so 4 (still a rare beast, lol) would be a 4w3 with a strong 7 or 8 fix.
    I believe every core, tritype, instinctual variant combo exists. Anything less would illustrate a humanity that fits in a neat box, which is absolutely not the case. This is one of the reasons I value the Enneagram, it's exhaustive nature in allowing for the slight variety that very much exists from one personality to another. Even close matches to me, someone like @brainheart or @Animal as examples, are still varied slightly from me-- which makes sense. How could we not be slightly varied for having completely different sets of experience and exposure to people and events?

    To say the possibility of an Sx/So 4w5 of any tritype does not exist is foolish, as each aspect measures a different element of personality (not to mention all of the Enneagram scholars acknowledge the possible combination of any core/wing and instinctual variant, yes even a 4w5 Sx/So).
    Find my Enneagram writing here. Also, I'd love for you to take my six question Enneagram surveyEnneagram survey!✨
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  9. #19
    So she did. small.wonder's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nixie View Post
    This pushes the thread topic, but I've been wanting to ask this directly for a while.

    I am not sx, and would speak up this way to a very close, small core of people, but not express such outside of it. But for the record, I believe it's better to say something and dislike my inhibition - thus, in a healthier state, I might get over it.
    Yeah, I've done it with friends or family, but also in classrooms, restaurants, the middle of hallways, coffee shops-- wherever I've felt that way. I'll explain more further down.

    The point is that someone can have a social/intimate split in what and when they express themselves, or not have one so much (the time bomb goes off when it goes off). Can struggling with such a split or not be part of instinctual variant differences, or is it more likely due to some other functional difference or wing? If it's not a variant thing, what could it be? Is it even possible to be a type 4 if one is shy of some contexts and not others in this way?
    I may be totally missing what you are asking, so feel free to clarify if I miss the mark. I think struggling with that "social/intimate split" (as you put it) is the definition of Sx-last. My emotional/intellectual expression as an Sx-first 4w5 has an almost involuntary way of manifesting when it wants to-- in the moment, it doesn't really consider others or my own shame (which is why Sx 4 is called "shameless" at times). Self control is a discipline I've had to invest in the healthier I've become, to channel that energy and use it for good.

    But back to the topic at hand: your hesitation to speak up about something that bothers you in social settings is completely characteristic of 4 minus Sx, which equals unbuffered shame. 4 is full of shame, which I suspect is what keeps you from speaking in those moments. It has everything to do with instinctual variants. As Sp/So you are the 4 that is long suffering to a point but sometimes suffers vocally. You feel an obligation to bite your tongue, put your head down and just deal with it-- you suffer stoically and attemp to pull yourself up by your boot straps. Your So auxiliary would still color that picture with longing for greater social connection and vocally bemoaning it's lack at times. Sx=a draw to and comfort with intensity, and in some ways being overly intense (and "making others suffer" in the case of Sx 4). Some 4 (can't remember who) on the forum attributed Sx-first folks to junkies-- intensity junkies, which is why I trigger and speak up in situations in which I am provoked. I can't not engage with intensity...or it's a struggle anyway.

    I have to clarify one thing, I do think its normal to be comfortable with some situations and not others. Especially for us as 4's, intimate interaction is so much more comfortable and filling than the greater social sea-- I would dare say that no 4 would prefer the shallow interaction of a crowd to a group of a few close friends (and find more comfort and freedom there). My comfort with intensity and responding to it does not equal comfort with the social sphere. I'm still quite a loaner there, aside from those I know well-- the one on one is where I'm most alive and myself. I think that's part of it too. These public conflicts I've gotten into are always with an individual (I'm not engaging a crowd). I can be in a room full of people but still tunnel vision an intense exchange with a single person (positive or negative).

    Does that shed any light? Anyone else, feel free to chime in.
    Find my Enneagram writing here. Also, I'd love for you to take my six question Enneagram surveyEnneagram survey!✨

  10. #20
    Paranoid Android Video's Avatar
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    Thanks! I feel compelled to spoiler my reply because it runs more personal about sx-last than I'm comfortable occupying the full page space with in an sx/so thread, though it may be of relevance as a comparison to sx.



    On sx/so 4w5, I don't have examples but can imagine the type and believe that any variant on a core is possible. However, I do suspect some variants will show up more often than others in types with traits that they reinforce. So, while an sp-last 4w5 is possible, I don't expect there to be as many of them as the other variants among 4w5s. However, sx-first in general may be more frequent in 4s than it would be among other cores.
    4w3 6w5 1w2 sx/sp ISFP

    RLOAX (don't do it)
    Melancholic Hufflepuff
    A lonely island where only what is permitted to move moves, becomes an ideal. Jung

    Kiss Kiss [johari] Bang Bang [nohari]

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