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[Type 5] Sexual Fives, Let's talk

B

brainheart

Guest
Hey there.

Sexual Five seems a lot like a four to me, and this is where I get all stinkin' confused. Have you been confused, as in thought you were a four?

I like to think I'm a Four (understanding myself seems to be paramount in my life), but my deal is I exhibit very sexual five-like behaviors. For example, intimacy for me means sharing confidences. Having a relationship where I can talk openly about things I don't talk about with anyone else... wow, does it give me a rush. This usually happens long-distance, either via internet or phone or texting. That lack of actual physical interaction makes me feel far more comfortable about opening up. Also, often the physical interaction seems superfluous, like why do we have to be physically present when talking is so special? Or even that the physical interaction would change things, taint them.

Other people seem to perceive this as goofy, like a relationship isn't 'real' unless you are engaged in reality together. I counter that some of the most 'real' relationships I've had have been like this. And when this sort of relationship ends, it devastates me, because I no longer have someone to share my innermost thoughts and feelings with.

I have person to person relationships as well- my husband, my children, a couple of friends. These are all very special to me and I value them highly. But I'm not open with them in the same way. With them I feel relatively stable and secure, but I also hide a lot. To share everything seems potentially hazardous, and I want these relationships to last forever.

That's the appeal of a forum like this to me. I feel the need to share what's within, but I don't want to deal with the repercussions of sharing within my real life.

How is it for you?
 
Last edited:

Speed Gavroche

Whisky Old & Women Young
Joined
Oct 20, 2008
Messages
5,152
MBTI Type
EsTP
Enneagram
6w7
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
Hey there.

Sexual Five seems a lot like a four to me, and this is where I get all stinkin' confused. Have you been confused, as in thought you were a four?

Sexual 5w4s are fourish and likely to be mistyped as four, but other than that, Sx people are likely to be mistyped as a general rule.


Other people seem to perceive this as goofy, like a relationship isn't 'real' unless you are engaged in reality together.


Yes, I think like this myself. You are not in a relationships if you can't actually touch the person.

Here are severals examples of Sexuals 5s:

[youtube=Mw8KJ29qph0]Jim Morrison 5w4 Sx/Sp[/youtube]
[youtube=xEerEAerD48]Björk 5w4 Sx/Sp[/youtube]
[youtube=Wqzn9F0GI1o]Kurt Cobain 5w4 Sx/Sp[/youtube]
[youtube=BWOKtktYfP0]Thom Yorke 5w4 Sx/Sp[/youtube]

[youtube=iREKEWdjAUU]John Lennon 5w4 Sx/So[/youtube]
[youtube=8msBBzkJn_E]Patti Smith 5w4 Sx/So[/youtube]

[youtube=OnA1N3cunOM]Jodie Foster 5w6 Sx/Sp[/youtube]

[youtube=1m_OXH7n0Rw]Leon Trotsky 5w6 Sx/So[/youtube]
[youtube=ez4rbj1AZGg]Howard Hughes 5w6 Sx/So[/youtube]
[youtube=vQdrcPYSG28]Stan Lee 5w6 Sx/So[/youtube]
[youtube=jaf0O2JTDkE]Gregory House 5w6 Sx/So[/youtube]
[youtube=dplb8D3Rhdw]Mystery 5w6 Sx/So[/youtube][/
 
B

brainheart

Guest
Thanks for the videos. Got any for 4w5s?

What do you mean, sexual variants are usually mistyped?
 

Thunderbringer

New member
Joined
Jul 6, 2010
Messages
274
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
6w7
Thanks for the videos. Got any for 4w5s?

What do you mean, sexual variants are usually mistyped?

From my experience, a lot of people do seem to mistype the sexual 5w4s as 4s. Kurt Cobain and Bjork are perfect examples of people I've seen typed as 4s repeatedly. If you notice, the 5w4s tend to be very awkward in their interviews compared to the 5w6s so many equate strange and odd into being a 4.
 
B

brainheart

Guest
From my experience, a lot of people do seem to mistype the sexual 5w4s as 4s. Kurt Cobain and Bjork are perfect examples of people I've seen typed as 4s repeatedly. If you notice, the 5w4s tend to be very awkward in their interviews compared to the 5w6s so many equate strange and odd into being a 4.

I don't think that people equate strange and odd with four, necessarily. I think people often consider Cobain and Bjork to be four because their music is very emotional- it hits them on an emotional level, and they strike them as people who like to delve deeply into their emotions. There is a romanticism to them.
 

Spamtar

Ghost Monkey Soul
Joined
Sep 1, 2009
Messages
4,468
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5w4
I love a girl with a big fat pair of brains
 

InvisibleJim

Permabanned
Joined
Nov 19, 2009
Messages
2,387
I tend to be more confused for either 8 or 6. Sx loves to be 'on task' then 'off task' based upon interest; in addition one can chase the most interesting or the brightest light and easily discard any superfluous motivations. This can seem very 8 when taking charge because it is exactly how they are described, whereas it can also swing to appear like the defensive 6. But then as a 5w6, that is to be expected.
 

JoSunshine

That's my name biotch!
Joined
Dec 17, 2009
Messages
659
MBTI Type
eNfj
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2
I just ended a relationship with someone who behaves much in the way the OP describes. He wanted to text and IM with me all day everyday and would only open up over IM. He didn't seem to place much importance on actually spending time together or physical contact and would clam up when talking in person. It felt very cold and distant to me, but I think anything other than what you describe would be extremely uncomfortable to him.
 
B

brainheart

Guest
I just ended a relationship with someone who behaves much in the way the OP describes. He wanted to text and IM with me all day everyday and would only open up over IM. He didn't seem to place much importance on actually spending time together or physical contact and would clam up when talking in person. It felt very cold and distant to me, but I think anything other than what you describe would be extremely uncomfortable to him.

I like time together, but I don't usually want to talk. A little time together also goes a long way for me. And when we're together I'd rather do non-talking things, connect on that level (in a romantic relationship). But yeah, I don't necessarily like people looking at me when I'm talking about personal stuff. It makes me feel very awkward.
 

Totenkindly

@.~*virinaĉo*~.@
Joined
Apr 19, 2007
Messages
50,187
MBTI Type
BELF
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594
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
I don't think that people equate strange and odd with four, necessarily. I think people often consider Cobain and Bjork to be four because their music is very emotional- it hits them on an emotional level, and they strike them as people who like to delve deeply into their emotions. There is a romanticism to them.

They're evokers. It doesn't necessarily mean they're emotionally driven people per se, but they know how to trigger an aesthetic/emotional response.
 

Spamtar

Ghost Monkey Soul
Joined
Sep 1, 2009
Messages
4,468
MBTI Type
INTP
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5w4
Well, that's helpful. Yes thank you. Although two brains... hmm

reality_two_brains.jpg


Yeah it sometimes makes me feel like a kid in a candy store
 

Ochoa

Permabanned
Joined
May 10, 2010
Messages
1
Jim Morrison = 4w3 sp/sx
Bjork = 9w1 sx. I don't know why people mistype her as a five. I know about a dozen sx5w4s who are adamant she's not their type. I guess it's wishful thinking.
Kurt Cobain = 5w4 sp/sx
Thom Yorke = 5w4 sp/sx
John Lennon and Patti Smith look right.
Jodie Foster and Mystery are 3s.
Howard Hughes = sx/sp
 
B

brainheart

Guest
Jim Morrison = 4w3 sp/sx
Bjork = 9w1 sx. I don't know why people mistype her as a five. I know about a dozen sx5w4s who are adamant she's not their type. I guess it's wishful thinking.
Kurt Cobain = 5w4 sp/sx
Thom Yorke = 5w4 sp/sx
John Lennon and Patti Smith look right.
Jodie Foster and Mystery are 3s.
Howard Hughes = sx/sp

Yeah, Bjork has a Lucky Charms vibe to her that I don't exactly relate to. That said, I don't know how anyone can be so confident of other people's types.
 

The_World_As_Will

New member
Joined
May 18, 2010
Messages
415
heh, if John and Patti are accurate representations of 5w4 sx/so, than idk if I am one, I mean I totally 'get' them, and relate to them but i haven't a clue if I give off the same vibes as they do, maybe it's due to a difference in tritype but the original 'core' type is the same?. Here's a video I made in the video type thread, what do you guys think? sx/so right or not? or maybe just a different expression of sx/so? though a poster did notice this apparent sx/so-ness idk, thoughts are appreciated.
 

The_World_As_Will

New member
Joined
May 18, 2010
Messages
415
[youtube=ilYnB9u72yg]5 sx[/youtube]

"You were playing a secret agent?"


:D that's awesome, in a creepy sort of stalker way lol, I tend to do that at times.. randomly following people it's fun! lol though the selecting people bit gets a bit too much. But observing peoples interactions and sort listening to their conversations to find out more about them is great, maybe slightly neurotic though
 

Rail Tracer

Freaking Ratchet
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Jun 29, 2010
Messages
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sx/so
Thanks for the videos. Got any for 4w5s?

What do you mean, sexual variants are usually mistyped?

Depending on what type you are, sexual types tend to be mistyped because they can very easily look like other types. Just like the concept of merging that "applies" with sexual types.

Like my example, a 9w1 SX/SO can look more like a main type 1 instead of a main type 9.
 

INTPness

New member
Joined
Jan 22, 2009
Messages
2,157
MBTI Type
INTP
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5w4
While I definitely relate to the OP, I think there are still differences between the INTP version and the INFP version of 5w4 sx.

Similarity: I definitely enjoy communications through writing. It allows me time to think clearly about what I want to say. In person, it is sometimes harder to formulate the right words quickly, or even to say them in the right tone. Also, in person, my batteries are sometimes drained, which may make me appear that I don't want to talk.

Difference: I really do want to talk deeply and bond in person (with the right people, people who want the same thing). You mentioned not wanting to reveal a lot of things to your own husband - that seems so foreign to me. I would absolutely want to be able to tell my wife anything. And I'd want her to be able to tell me anything. Face to face. In person. If we couldn't be open, I would feel like we shouldn't be together - like we should be with someone else instead of each other. I would feel a void in trust - because my intuition would tell me (reveal to me) that she was "holding something back" - keeping a part of herself hidden from me, while I was revealing all of myself. I think this is a difference between Fe and Fi. Fi wants to keep it internal. Fe wants to talk about it openly.

Similarity: Because I prefer the written word, I can definitely create meaningful bonds and friendships very easily through writing. I can come to care very deeply about you and have tremendous respect for you solely through writing, but ----->

Difference: Although I can get close to you and even come to care very deeply about you through writing, my logical, NT side says, "I can't fall in love with you or determine that I'm going to be exclusive with you unless I've been able to see you, touch you, experience you - over time." Many hours spent together. To see how we interact, to see who you are as a person - which could quite easily be different than how you have "written". Logic simply says, "you gotta meet this person before you have a full-blown relationship with them." Get close, bond, and talk about deep stuff through writing? Sure!

Sell the farm, quit the job, and get closer to my pen-pal than I would my own wife (if I had one)? No way. And I don't care how awkward we might be together - if we're going to have anythng together, I want to eat dinner with you, laugh with you, look at you, work through our awkwardness together, have good conversations in person, etc. Anything other than that would only feel like I'm "half way" with you. Like going to the Super Bowl and leaving at half time.
 
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